Queation for those that go out to dance clubs.....

This happens to me a lot, and i'm not a huge fan of it. I usually just say something like, "I'm gonna go find my other friend that's here!" or say that i have to go to the bathroom, get a drink, etc...then look busy if he finds you later. Maybe that's the immature way to deal with it, haha, but it works!

Oh that's creepy!!  I am really good at avoiding people.  This will probably make me sound like an awful person, but I actually avoid even innocent situations where a friend is trying to introduce a new guy friend of theirs to me.  If i see them coming, looking like they will talk to me, I will purposely turn around and pretend I am doing something intently the other way and they will pass me over.  I can't meet new people lol

So I guess if you see them heading toward you, make yourself look busy, or turn around and pretend you don't hear them lol

I usually tell the guy “Hey, ease up a little. I’m just here to dance & have a good time with friends. I’m not looking for anything else, & I’m sure that my bf/dh/so wouldn’t be thrilled with your behavior.”

Wasn't it Guns N' Roses that said "Welcome to the Jungle".   Now it has been many years but I used to know women that thrived on this game every Friday and Saturday night.  They would see how much money they could get the guy to shell out before he woke up and realized that nothing was going to happen.

BEVOLASVEGAS

I usually tell the guy “Hey, ease up a little. I’m just here to dance & have a good time with friends. I’m not looking for anything else, & I’m sure that my bf/dh/so wouldn’t be thrilled with your behavior.”

Something along these lines, or turn your back on them "End of dance time now buddy" hehe or just take off.

I am a shocker and enjoy making men like this pay for their actions, often they get a very snarky remark or even if they touch me a slap, on the hand that is touching me. But I often seem to attractive negative sexual attention from cause I have tattoos, weird coloured hair and normally dressed to reveal but not too much so I have been told by men that I look like an easy target but I have news for them I am there for a good time not a short time hehe.

sillysally

 This weekend I went to a work convention in Indianapolis.  During the day is the convention/trade show, and at night there is usually a *lot* of partying.  We went to this one bar/dance club that was awesome and we had a lot of fun.  The only thing is that there was this guy that came up to us at some point in the night and danced with my friend and I--which was fine--I figure I'm there to dance and I don't mind the dancing part of it.  After a bit though I became uncomfortable when he started touching my butt in various ways and kept saying things to me that I will not repeat here (not mean, just creepy).  I tried to deal with this by moving out of his reach and he would just follow me.  Finally my friend and I were able to shake him. 

I'm not a very confrontational person and I don't got out to this kind of place very much.  I actually cannot remember the last time I was out before this and before Friday night I can't remember the last time I had more than a couple drinks at a time (yes, I was rather hung over the next day).  Is there a firm, yet not extremely bitchy way to defuse a situation like that without causing a scene?

 

 

If it were me, I'd have just frowned at him, shook my head and then after a beat smile and carry on dancing.  Then if he did it again I'd stop dancing and walk away, find another spot to dance in.  I would HOPE that would get the message across. 

Makes me think of a something I read somewhere; "He was like a puppy sniffing round her skirts... and did she care if a puppy bit her with his little teeth?"

Well yeah actually, sometimes it hurts and/or it's annoying.  But men and dogs can be so alike in some ways....

Usually a quick "I don't think my boyfriend would approve" gets them to quit.

Running away does not work - they follow. You have to be firm - you don't like what they are doing.

My dancing style doesn't lend itself to that sort of thing. I am too fast and to into it to even notice things like...men. LOL. I am always with my SO but I do break off and mingle on my own a lot of the time. I usually keep dancing, close my eyes and they can't keep up...problem solved. If they CAN keep up then I want to dance with them, and they usually know a dance is about the music and nothing else, if they can move with me...they are there to move...not to score.

If there is a guy who is all up on me...I give them the hand...complete with wedding ring.

This happened alot to me and my friends when we would go to the clubs. I either said that I have a boyfriend, even if I didnt and the guy was ugly or sleazy looking or I would grab a friend and go off to the bathroom or far far away from the person.

 Good idea.  Is it bad luck to get a ring for that hand if you're NOT married/engaged?  It's great for getting rid of people.  Just after I was married a guy tapped me on the shoulder and said "my friend wants to talk to you"  I turned round, drinks in hand, and the guy caught sight of the wedding ring, kind of touched the corresponding finger on his hand smile and kind of gestured "never mind, it doesnt matter!".  No confrontation, no unpleasantness, just, "ooh, she's nice.... oh she's married. Oh well."

Depends on how old the guy is and how drunk he is. If he's young and/or drunk, you just gotta be firm. If he's not drunk and not a complete social retard, you could get away with being more subtle.

If it were me, I'd get confrontational. I once shoved a guy across the dance floor with all my strength. Everyone around me cheered and he was peeved at being made to look like a fool, but he watched himself after that. 

You could always step back suddenly onto his foot or swing a closed hand into you-know-whats, or whirl around with a reverse roundhouse to the head, ala a Hugh Grant movie or something. I mean, make it look like Keystone Kops but hit selected targets that should diminish his interest for at least a while. That 's if you're trying to be subtle.

If subtlety is not necessary, knock him out. Some guys, you can nail on the gonads and it just makes them mad, so you usually need to combo that one with something else. The advantage of stepping on a foot is that it creates such pain and confusion that interest in other things is temporarily suspended.

Or, accept the  inevitability that he is going to one day encounter a woman who has a brother, husband, BF, concerned friend, whatever, about my size and strength and speed but without the sense of humor and patience. Their method won't offer him the chance to reconsider. They'll just start breaking bones until he quits.

I haven't been to a dance club for many years, but apparently, they've changed quite a bit. I don't have advice, but a few comments.

ron2

Or, accept the  inevitability that he is going to one day encounter a woman who has a brother, husband, BF, concerned friend, whatever, about my size and strength and speed but without the sense of humor and patience. Their method won't offer him the chance to reconsider. They'll just start breaking bones until he quits.

This actually happened to me once. A guy grabbed me and my BF and his brothers confronted him. When we left for the evening, the guy and his "gang" were waiting outside and a full-on street fight ensued. Ugh! The opposing team ended up in jail but there was blood all around. An ugly scene for sure.

I'm with corvus and ron2. The guy would be sorry he grabbed me, uninvited, and would think twice or three times before doing it to another girl in the future.

 Last time that happened, I grabbed a finger and not-so-gently bent it backwards.  He got the picture and ceased and desisted.