Do any of you have a "Dog Rule List"?

We have six large dogs and many are afraid of them so my crew generally goes outside when folks come over.  I may or may not let a few in at a time, depending on the comfort level of  my guests and the excitablity level of my dogs.

1.  If Shadow doesn't know you, observe strange dog protocol. Stand at least two feet away from him, relaxed and don't try to immediately engage him, and let him smell you. He is not a biter but he is aloof and shy. Don't just assume you can swoop in for a pat on the head. When he is curious, you can lower your hand below is head and let him sniff you.
 
2. If you hit him, I may hit you even harder. And you won't like that.
 
3. Do not ever let him out of a contained area without a leash. And don't assume all animals are friends with each other. We can meet under controlled circumstances where dogs have equal access or both or on leash.

I'm right *with* 99.99999% of everything said above (since my dogs eat 'real' food I just say "please don't give them anything I haven't HANDED you to give them")
 However, beyond that I just wanted to say this -- if you live in a whole house-ful of people all pretty much ignoring your wishes for what you want done with this dog while you're gone, in honesty, a list of rules 'posted' probably is going to be ignored and laughed at.
 
Now -- if it's a list of reminders ... that's great.  If it's a list of "If he begs at the table please just IGNORE him and he **will** go away, then you can call him to you after you get up and give him one of _____ for doing well." (i.e., suggestions of what they *can* do that falls within your "rules" -- but let's call them guidelines or helpful hints??
 
If you are still living at home because of finances ... setting 'rules' is probably not gonna work.  It sounds "holier than thou" and it's probably going to promote resentment while they pretty much do whatever they want and then just don't tell you about it?? (depending on your family, that is)>
 
How about suggestions for accomplishing what you need done in your absence?
 
How about a family meeting (maybe MAKE dinner for everyone and put some effort into doing THAT so when you *ask* them to do something they might listen with respect?)
 
In other words, when you ask people to change how they regularly deal with a dog they *live* with it's kind of a big deal.  I'm not saying you're wrong -- you're not.  But people don't like to be told they don't do things right .... particularly when it's what they've always done.  Education has to occur somewhere.
 
If you've got a puppy you're trying to train, gettng the family on board with what end result you want is a smart thing. 
 
If they are absolutely not going to be helpful -- then just plain keep the pup crated.  And if THEN the family says "why do you crate him ALL the time -- that's mean when we're home" you can then say "Well, I just didn't want to make a big deal of it, but it is *really* important to me that he no _______, _____________ and ______________ and rather than get upset with you I just figured preventing him from being a problem was the next best solution."
 
Am I making sense? 
 
Having a 'list' of what you want, need and expect is a good idea.  But as I'm looking at these lists (and a LOT of us, me included, get pretty danged militant about what we do and do *not* want done with/for/to our dogs) it just made me think that a family that still thinks "spanking" a dog is appropriate ... a 'list' of no nos probably isn't going to make a hoot and a hill of beans 'difference' and it may just palin spark more resentment and a worse scenario.
 
I was intending to be helpful, not critical here.

These are rules for those that come into my house. Mainly clueless family members that love my dog to death, but think differently about dog ownership than I do.

I have a door bolter of a dog SINCE most people do not know better to tell her to "wait".
So...NUMBER ONE RULE IN MY HOUSE IS:
1.)If you come into my house, that front door BETTER be ALL THE WAY closed before you open the baby gate door to come in. If this rule is broken, it may result in me kicking your butt. If my dog gets out; you're dead.

2.) DO NOT, and I REPEAT, DO NOT play ball with my dog. She will NOT leave you alone if you do and she'll stalk you in circles like a shark. She's the pit bull version of the golden retriever from the movie "Spanglish".

3.) DO NOT feed my dog ANYTHING that you do not hear the words "that's alright for Ella" to. IF MY dog gets a french fry, it's because I give it to her.

4.) DO NOT touch her ball, period. This won't get you bitten, but it will cause Ella to go into a playtime frenzy where all her manners will be shot down. She's a bully and she's strong. Touch her ball, and you'll find this out. My mom has left with bruises the size of her head on her tummy because she was teasing Ella with her ball.

5.) Don't ask if you can bring your pets into my home. NO. You CANNOT. My mom has asked me if she can bring her dog over before. I wonder what part of "My dog will SERIOUSLY hurt your dog, physically, then emotionally and mentally for the rest of his life" she doesn't understand?

6.) Do not touch my dog in a mean way and DO NOT use militant disciplinary action on her because she walks into a door before you. This will result in you being kicked out of my house and never invited back. And that's if I don't kill you.

7.) NO YOU CANNOT TAKE MY DOG FOR A WALK. Not without me. I trust maaaaybe 2 people besides me to take my dog outside of my house.

8.) Eat carefully and DO NOT DROP YOUR FOOD ON THE FLOOR. If you drop your food on the floor, pick it up IMMEDIATELY. See rule # 3. This one is mainly for my children because they open easter eggs and drop jelly beans on the floor. Ella's good with "leave it" but if they miss it and it stays on the floor, ella will pick it up and eat it later. This is a recent thing for her. She never used to eat stuff that didn't belong to her and she won't unless it's on the kitchen floor.

These are rules for those that come into my house. Mainly clueless family members that love my dog to death, but think differently about dog ownership than I do.

I have a door bolter of a dog SINCE most people do not know better to tell her to "wait".
So...NUMBER ONE RULE IN MY HOUSE IS:
1.)If you come into my house, that front door BETTER be ALL THE WAY closed before you open the baby gate door to come in. If this rule is broken, it may result in me kicking your butt. If my dog gets out; you're dead.

2.) DO NOT, and I REPEAT, DO NOT play ball with my dog. She will NOT leave you alone if you do and she'll stalk you in circles like a shark. She's the pit bull version of the golden retriever from the movie "Spanglish".

3.) DO NOT feed my dog ANYTHING that you do not hear the words "that's alright for Ella" to. IF MY dog gets a french fry, it's because I give it to her.

4.) DO NOT touch her ball, period. This won't get you bitten, but it will cause Ella to go into a playtime frenzy where all her manners will be shot down. She's a bully and she's strong. Touch her ball, and you'll find this out. My mom has left with bruises the size of her head on her tummy because she was teasing Ella with her ball.

5.) Don't ask if you can bring your pets into my home. NO. You CANNOT. My mom has asked me if she can bring her dog over before. I wonder what part of "My dog will SERIOUSLY hurt your dog, physically, then emotionally and mentally for the rest of his life" she doesn't understand?

6.) Do not touch my dog in a mean way and DO NOT use militant disciplinary action on her because she walks into a door before you. This will result in you being kicked out of my house and never invited back. And that's if I don't kill you.

7.) NO YOU CANNOT TAKE MY DOG FOR A WALK. Not without me. I trust maaaaybe 2 people besides me to take my dog outside of my house.

8.) Eat carefully and DO NOT DROP YOUR FOOD ON THE FLOOR. If you drop your food on the floor, pick it up IMMEDIATELY. See rule # 3. This one is mainly for my children because they open easter eggs and drop jelly beans on the floor. Ella's good with "leave it" but if they miss it and it stays on the floor, ella will pick it up and eat it later. This is a recent thing for her. She never used to eat stuff that didn't belong to her and she won't unless it's on the kitchen floor.

#1. Shut the door immediately behind you. Sammy bolts.
#2. DO NOT tell my dogs to SHUT UP when they  bark, it makes them bark more. Ignore instead.
#3. NO BABY TALK
#4. No getting them excited by saying "Hi" in a high voice.
#5. No ball playing with all three.

1) If you are a stranger, don't be offended if Onyx doens't like you. Be happy that Crusher does. Calling her, whispering to her, playing peekaboo with her, will not work. If you sit still and pretend you don't care if she likes you she will usually come around.

2) If you invite Crusher into your lap, be prepared to pay the consequenses. He weighs 90 pounds and hates it when he touches the couch. That means he must be completely in your lap. Are you prepared for that?

3) Open and close the door in an orderly fashion. My dogs won't bolt at the first sign of daylight, but they cannot resist a long open door. And if you let Crusher out, don't chase him. There is only one way to get him to come back and that is to walk to the park, leash him and come home. So you had better be prepared to stick around with my kids for a bit.

4) If you want to feed my dogs, I am pretty liberal, but ask first. Also just assume that they will no longer let you play video games for the duration of your stay. You will have commited yourself to handfeeding my dogs popcorn. You may even have to do it the next time you come.

5) No wrestling with my dogs. Either of them. I have small children and that is asking for problems. So none, zero, zilch. Also you are not alpha here, Crusher comes before you not the other way around. If you try to pin him down and he bites you, consider yourself warned. Next time punishment will come from me.

6) If you are terrified of dogs and I really like you, I may make allowances for you. If you make a scene and yell at me to put my dogs outside or in their crates, you know where the door is. Just see rule #3 and the fifth sentance in rule #5.

7) I have huskies. Part of my furniture is husky hair. Deal with it. They live here, you don't.

there are a few here that i didn't add to my list.. i guess i don't really have that many guests so they're things i forget, but there is ONE big one that ron2 mentioned that i totally forgot-
 
DO NOT allow your leashed dogs to approach my dogs through the fence.  they can meet under controlled circumstances somewhere else, preferrably somewhere that leashes are not needed.  nose to nose sniffing at the end of the leash is a BIG no-no.
 
also, and this is a rule that i cannot get my husband to understand, so i have to enforce it in nefarious ways- NO DOG PARK IF THERE ARE MORE THAN 2 OTHER DOGS IN THERE.  walk on by, and don't look back.  it's just not worth it.  if you are in the park alone, and a bunch of people come in, leash up and leave.  doesn't matter who they are, what kind of dogs, or how well behaved my dogs may be at the time.  since i cannot control nor predict the level of training or behavior quirks of strange dogs, i am not willing to gamble... it will always be my fault.  no matter what.

1) There is only one person in the world who is allowed to feed my dogs without asking. She knows who she is. Everyone else, keep your food, treats, cookies, Beggin Strips, crayons, paintballs, and beverages to yourself. Violation of this rule may result in emergency veterinary care, which YOU will be paying for.

2) Under no circumstances should any door (including crate doors) be opened without expressed permission. I have dogs who will tear into each other with zero notice. Again, YOU will be paying for the emergency veterinary care.

3) Your children may not touch my dogs. Sorry. I don't care that they "want" to come out. They are not used to children, and I will not make them uncomfortable in their own home. They are put up for their, and your child's, safety.

4) If I give a dog a command, it is expected to be followed, immediately. Do NOT say "it's ok, she can stay!" and HOLD ONTO my dog when I tell her to get off. It is NOT ok. She does care to be restrained.

5) They're not too thin. I do not want to hear it. Get out of my house.

Callie - you made perfect sense to me! A list would make me the laughing stock of my entire family and circle of friends (and would be ignored anyway so instead, I get to repeat myself constantly[].) At least the rules that are ignored are not life-threatening (like jumping up or feeding meat table scraps)....
My Grandparents were brought up with being very physical with dogs so I did have to make sure that everyone knew I (and I ALONE) was in charge of training. I also made sure that I took care of everything (feeding, exercise etc...) before going anywhere so that all Dodger would do in my abscense is sleep (and eat table scraps[8|]). I always left a treatball for them to give him if he did ever get bored and start annoying them (I also had no social life so I could be home as much as possible when Dodger was an untrained puppers)... Management is what needed to happen for us - a list wouldn't have made any difference.

Wow, so many of you have great lists. I really need to make one. Calliecritturs .. in answer to your question -- I only live with 2 other people; my parents. The thing is though, my sisters and their kids or my aunt and my cousin visit a lot. .. I'm talking at least 3-4 times per week, we are a very close family. The only reason I want the rules is so that when I'm not home to control what the younger kids are doing, the parents and/or my parents can follow the list. [] 
I just figured out today though my mom's way of dealing with Chico's biting habit was tapping him in the mouth. [:@] I don't exactly know why he started it and why it's getting worse (probably because of that) but I just put him down and ignore him when he play bites or really bites me.. is that a bad or good thing? I'm not 100% sure on what to do with him when he does that, or when he "attacks" Pedro.
Also, I was wondering why a few of you have 'NO baby talk' on your lists? ..because it encourages them to get hyper or excited? I talk to my dogs like that a lot of the time, lol. [&:] Oops.

My family all know how to treat Trudy. Like any other member of the family. Treat her like a little child, children and dogs both need to be watched and cared for.

I only have one dog and he doesn't bark or beg or try to run out the front door ... so I don't really have any rules.  Nobody else but me is much inclined to take him for a walk, although DGS will offer to do it every once in awhile. I can't imagine that he has ever  been spanked or yelled at - certainly not since I've had him - and I can't imagine anyone ever wanting to. He's very mellow and doesn't get hyper over anything except a flashlight.
 
Joyce

I#%92m pretty laid back about rules at my house, but I do have a few.
 
1. My dogs do not eat “people” food. If you give them “people” food, they get diarrhea, and if they get diarrhea, I will call you in the middle of the night or every time I have to take them out. Just to thank you.
2. My dogs are not allowed on my furniture. PERIOD! I have leather furniture & I really like the way it looks without dog hair on it & holes in it. It seems to work really well for me, so don#%92t encourage them to jump up with you.
3. Please do not try to wrestle with my dogs. Even if you are only playing with one of them, the rest are going to join in & something is going to be broke. I am always in hopes that it#%92s something on you & not something that belongs to me.
4. Bevo is a bit OCD. Please don#%92t bother his bed. If you wrinkle it, he will obsessively straighten it until his nose bleeds if I am not around to stop him.
5. The dogs aren#%92t allowed in the kitchen or dining room, so don#%92t call for them to enter. They are fully aware of the difference in their hardwood floors & my tile floors.
6. If you are scared of my dogs, you had better work really hard to impress me. If I am not impressed, you will not be invited back, because, honestly, my dogs are harmless.
 
I think those cover it.

1 - Do not hit my dog if he does something you don't like. It doesn't work. In fact, he'll probably just be more compelled to bother you. (I have a friend who is constantly smacking him. She does it to her own ten month old baby, too, it drives me nuts)

2 - Please please please don't just stand there with the door open. He usually doesn't bolt, but sometimes he does.

3 - Don't feed him at the table and then get angry when he hangs around by your feet.

4 - Don't give him your chicken wings when you're done with them!

5 - Don't ever say, "Oh, it's fine!" when I give him a command. I don't give commands if it's "fine".