It may be over (Bullymom)

 Well, you need to find out if he actually wants one. It sounds as though you don't so don't jump to conclusions. Sit down and talk to him and stop beating yourself up! The sooner you know what he's thinking the better off you'll be. Not knowing is worse than knowing imo.

*big hugs* and take things one step at a time. 

He told me that if "I" don't change, then he wants me to leave.  I don't know what's wrong with me and my doctor is absolutely no help.  What about Madison??  I don't want to give up on DH but I think he has already given up.  He is out of town until Saturday.  I cannot stop crying and I'm sure that Madison is going to start asking questions. 

You might have a bit of depression...have you considered talking with a therpist about how you're feeling? Oftentimes it's nice to have it out with someone who's not involved or on anyone's side so to speak.

ETA: if he wants you to change and you also do it will require time. The question is...are you both willing to take that time? Itwon't happen overnight...nor without you both taking an active role.

I have been on Paxil since Madison was born.  I don't think it's working anymore. 

the solution isn't always a pill...in fact a pill without therapy behind is IMO pretty useless. You need to learn how to deal with your feelings and cope. Pills don't really touch that. That's just one person's opinion tho.

Maybe the dosage needs to be changed.  My friend was on some medication (don't know the name) and she has to have them play w/ the dosages every now and then.

ETA: If you want to work on it, talk to him and see if he will as well.  If so, maybe some type of counseling could help?  His job might have some kind of employee help line.  They are confidiential and can help you find a qualified therapist in your area and usually covers a few (3 I think is what ours does) sessions. 

I'm always an advocate for trying to work things out and even more so when there are children involved. It sounds like there are some issues that each of you have though and if you don't work them out in some way, then there will continue to be problems. Just a thought, but your need for sleep may be a sign of depression. My suggestion is to try to find a counselor. If you have to go alone at first, then do that. If possible, try to see if he'll go with you. If you both love each other, it's worth fighting to save your marriage.

Bullymom

I have been on Paxil since Madison was born.  I don't think it's working anymore. 

Paxil had terrible effects on a friend of mine...she started taking them after her mom passed away....she was tired all the time, no interest in a decent sex life.....she said she felt like a zombie......

I've heard that too, snownose...plenty of choices for depression medication wise...IMO a therapist to listen and perhaps new medication if necessary could go a long way.

snownose

she was tired all the time, no interest in a decent sex life.....she said she felt like a zombie......

That's exactly how I feel.  I feel like I haven't slept in years and sex...  Well, it seems like a chore to me.  I know that's terrible and I don't want to be like that.  Not to mention I have very low self esteem.  I am over weight and I am working on changing that but even when I was thin, I was still not good enough for him.  I love him very much but he is expecting an over night change.  I guess I need to go talk to my doctor.

snownose

Bullymom

I have been on Paxil since Madison was born.  I don't think it's working anymore. 

Paxil had terrible effects on a friend of mine...she started taking them after her mom passed away....she was tired all the time, no interest in a decent sex life.....she said she felt like a zombie......

This happened to me too. I was on Paxil for a few months for depression, and it made me want to sleep ALL the time. It also made me feel very numb to everything. I had no emotions at all. Sure I wasn't crying anymore, but I wasn't doing much of anything else either. I was diagnosed with Major Depression and the only thing that helped me was seeing a Therapist. It's a constant thing that needs to be worked on though, but it might help you. Good luck ((hugs))

Bullymom

snownose

she was tired all the time, no interest in a decent sex life.....she said she felt like a zombie......

 

That's exactly how I feel.  I feel like I haven't slept in years and sex...  Well, it seems like a chore to me.  I know that's terrible and I don't want to be like that.  Not to mention I have very low self esteem.  I am over weight and I am working on changing that but even when I was thin, I was still not good enough for him.  I love him very much but he is expecting an over night change.  I guess I need to go talk to my doctor.

She got a different anti-depressant....and she feels much better.....

You really need to explain how you feel, the sex part is very important....Paxil is a known medication to rob one of one's desire to have sex....your doctor has to know this....it shouldn't feel like a chore....but, I am sure it does when one doesn't have any urges due to medication....

I would talk to the Dr and find a therapist.  My understanding is that the best combination is the *right* drug AND therapy.  That means you might have to try half a dozen drugs before you find the right one.  I do think therapy would help b/c it sounds like you are looking for an outside perspective and you deserve more encouragement, a pill can't do either of those. Maybe there is a family therapist that can see you both and you can talk about Madison?

Good advice from Gina and Snownose.  It could be that Paxil just isn't right for you, and there's probably more than one physical condition that can cause your symptoms besides thyroid problems ... so a really good, thorough physical work-up might not be a bad idea. And ... this is just MO, but I think when things aren't going well in a marriage it's rarely only one person that needs to make changes.

Joyce