Men Dating In Our 40's

And I'm an independent person, too. Many people have asked incredulously why I work when my boyfriend earns enough to support us both very comfortably. I've always wanted to work and have a career and my own financial security. I lean heavily on my boyfriend at the moment because he's senior staff and I'm only junior staff at my work, but I'm still committing my savings to the house fund and my salary to pay off the mortgage, and my plan is to buy a house of my own when I can afford it. My boyfriend wouldn't have been interested in a girl that didn't want her own career and have her own financial goals, just as I wouldn't have been interested in a man that wanted to take care of all that for me. I don't need human company and I secretly relish being on my own, but that doesn't mean I don't appreciate good company or enjoy cuddles and having someone to share things with and offer support. There's needing a relationship and then there's enjoying a relationship.

probe1957

It might sound pretty "nasty," but it's true.  Don't you think?  I mean, if all I wanted out of a relationship was sex, I could go to a prostitute and do so for a lot less money than a wife costs and PROBABLY have a lot better sex.

 

I think this is one of the biggest differences between men and women......paying for sex......

ron2

FourIsCompany

Your blank isn't made of gold

 

Mine's not gold-plated but it glows in the dark, a side effect of doing electrical work on energized circuits.

A couple of things.

It's good to have a list but I see these kind of lists as a means of weeding people out, rather than finding them. When you find someone to be with, lists are simply there in case you run out of toilet paper.

I'm weak in the knees when it comes to women. After my first wife passed away, I said I'd never marry again. I met my second wife in 1993 and we've been married since 2000. So, I can't imagine my life without being with a woman. Even if I don't get all the sex I want all the time. Accidently sounding sensitive but you've got to have something to talk about or do the other 23 hours and 50 minutes if the day.

I think the guy that published that list is just wearing his hurt on his sleeve.

 

 

Ron, your you-know-what doesn't have to be gold plated if your heart is.    

But, you may want to put it in the charger a bit longer.  Ten minutes isn't all that long.   

 

Humor aside, I think you nailed it.  The list came from a man who has been recently hurt.  Talk to him in ten years and his perspective may change.  But, I agree with Kate & Gina that lists are fine.  After all, it's his preference who he wants to date.   But, I hope he never finds a few extra pounds around his own middle - he may make it onto some really compliant good looking, skinny sex kitten's "do not date" list.  Too bad.
 

snownose

I think this is one of the biggest differences between men and women......paying for sex......

Men pay FOR sex.  Women pay WITH sex.  ;)

Billy what's the joke they have about that? Men don't pay the woman to stay...they pay the woman to LEAVE....lmbo.

"Ron, your you-know-what doesn't have to be gold plated if your heart is.    

But, you may want to put it in the charger a bit longer.  Ten minutes isn't all that long."

Anne:  ROFLMAO!

Humor aside, I think you nailed it.  The list came from a man who has been recently hurt.  Talk to him in ten years and his perspective may change.  But, I agree with Kate & Gina that lists are fine.  After all, it's his preference who he wants to date.   But, I hope he never finds a few extra pounds around his own middle - he may make it onto some really compliant good looking, skinny sex kitten's "do not date" list.  Too bad.

 i have to point out my husband's best friend Danny.... this man has a similar list and he hasnt had a date in TWENTY YEARS!!

She's too fat,

She's too short,

She isnt blond!

She's too tall, cant have a girl as tall as i am!

She ordered too much food AND ate it all!!

Her boobs arent big enough....

She talks too much,

She doesnt talk enough,

She was divorced,

I saw HER with a guy...

so basically if she isnt Anna Kournikova with the IQ of a pickle.. and still virgin... he doesnt want her. hence the reason why he hasnt had a date in twenty years.. oh.. and he's shy.. Danny came up with his list when his girlfriend "cheated" on him... and it wasnt a proper cheat. she flirted with another guy to make Danny jealous, to see if he cared enough to to even GET jealous and eventually marry her(her ultimate goal with him)... nope. he just dumped her.... in his mind their living arrangements were perfect. they were living in the same house, paying bills together, he was playing dad to her kids... why get married?

and yes Danny is quite a bitter person.. he's a nice to be around, would do anything for a friend, but he has a way of sucking the happiness out of a room just by walking in. seems like he's always got a black cloud following him around.
 

 

spiritdogs

But, you may want to put it in the charger a bit longer.  Ten minutes isn't all that long.

 

I've been hit by 120 V enough times that it just feels like a nerve tic. I have to check with my meter to make sure that was actual electricity. 277 V, OTOH, gets my attention. And a static charge on the case of a 12,000 V neon transformer hurts and the hurt stays with you for a while. I did that on an extension ladder 20 feet up. Fortunately, I have learned to let my arm react and not my whole body.

probe1957

snownose

I think this is one of the biggest differences between men and women......paying for sex......

Men pay FOR sex.  Women pay WITH sex.  ;)

One time when I was married to my ex-jerk, I mean ex-husband I went to donate blood.  They asked me "Have you ever, even once, had sex with someone for money or who has had sex with someone else for money?"

I looked at her and said "Do last week's groceries count?"

Unfortunately that didn't go over well.  (*I* thot it was funny)

My mother told me once when I was a teenager and I commented about someone who was whining because "my husband always expects ME to give in" and I said something about it not being fair.

My mother (who is not the warmest, fuzziest, lady on the planet but who occasionally nails something darned accurately) said "If you are looking for 'fair' don't get married.  Anyone who tells you marriage is a 50/50 proposition is LYING TO YOU.  Thru their teeth.  Like a rug!!  In marriage BOTH of you will give in to the other about 85% of the time."

The teenaged math wizard in me was befuddled.

She said "I'm serious ... but you have to remember -- you EACH will **think** you're giving in way more than the other one will perceive you ARE giving in.  You'll give in lots of times just because it works out better that way, or you understand something or it has to be that way.  OCCASIONALLY you will give in simply to appease him and he'll recognize it and know it.  OCCASIONALLY he will give in to you simply to appease you and YOU will recognize it and know it.  But if you try keeping score you both lose."

She was right ... but it only works that way if it IS a real marriage and you're both treating each other like human beings.  But a lot of folks have been married for 25 years and are still trying to keep score.  that sux.

Cassidys Mom

Okay, here’s my version of the craigslist guy’s posting:

I’m looking for a dependent woman to date because I like having all the power - women are inferior to men and they should just get used to that idea. But not too dependent, because I’m only looking for some casual sex and don’t really want to make any kind of investment in a relationship, either emotional, or financial. You want somebody to love you, get a dog. And you’d better be able to support yourself because I sure won’t. You want something nice, buy it yourself.

Even though I’m no prize, a 40+ year old divorced guy with kids, that doesn’t mean I can’t expect that YOU’LL be young, slim, and attractive. No fat chicks, and no mom with kids living at home. I won’t date a women who puts her kids first because I want a woman who is available whenever it’s convenient for me, and besides, you won’t ever come first with me anyway.

And speaking of sex, you’d better put out, in any way I want and whenever I want, or I’ll find someone else who will. It better be okay with you if I go out to bars to get drunk and pick up chicks, but I won’t date the kind of women who goes to bars, because they’re too stupid to know that’s what we’re there for.

Yeah, women will be lining up for this guy, lol! 

 

 

Yep, this guy is quite a prize.

 
I met DH when I was 17.  I am now 46, and have been married 26 years in a few weeks.  DH is dependent on ME--not financially, but emotionally.  He is extremely shy and prefers that I do all of our calls, make appointments, etc. If it were up to him, he would do everything by computer! LOL I have always been an independent type. Do NOT tell me not to do something; I will do it out of spite.  Say, "I'd rather you didn't..." and I will sit down and talk it over with you.

I worked in the most exclusive town in Oregon for years I have met this guy--he thinks because he's got $$$, he's God's gift to women.  Bleah--nothing could further from the truth.

As for sex, this guy couldn't keep up with me if he TRIED.  However, Since I am overweight (and married!), he'll never know what he's missing! 

BTW, Ron, are we related? Your sense of humor and way with words seem to be just like mine.