Im so sad...i dunno what to do

And I know you probably know this...but getting a dog "for one member" of the family rarely ever works out. It MUST be an agreement with all adults and young people in the home, and it must be at the right time. If either of those two issues don't jibe then trouble will present. The dog will always be a bone of contention or used as a wedge by either party

 
Absolutely!  I realize this doesn't help your situation at present, but that advice will help in a future dog or anything brought into your family.  In fact, most rescues and shelters want the entire family present before signing over a dog.  Everyone must be in agreeance or they won't adopt out.  Also, most good ones require all family members and any other pets to meet prior to adopting out.  Many people, myself included, are susceptible to impulse adopting!  Heck, I'd be bringing home dogs all the time but my husband doesn't want that.  It would destroy our marriage if I went ahead and did this and then had peeing, pooping and barking issues. 
 
I agree with crating and being extremely diligent with housebreaking.  Your husband may come around or he may not.  I wouldn't ever advecate for someone to lie to their spouse though.  Just digging you in deeper and causing more issues.  Good luck because Tink is a sweet pup!

ORIGINAL: Tinks_mom

I know Robert and he wouldnt care if i told him all of those things...hes not a bad guy but hes can be a real hard nose kwim? Tink is almost 5 months old btw.

Not to get too personal but weve had major issues and differences concerning his 17 year old who has lived with us for a little over a year...hes always making excuses for him...he lies because thats all he knows because thats what his mother does and this and that....but my Tink not being PERFECT at house training and hes ready to throw her out!!! I feel like this is the icing on the cake so to speak because of the "other" issues that we have.

Ive asked Robert time and time again to do something about his son...and hes as i said always making excuses for him...but because Tink is "mine" he doesnt want to..

Even accidents arent that hard to clean up after...they are normal stools (no pee accidents) and we have a carpet cleaner that I use right after the mess is found out.  Grrrrr Wonder if hes going to be hard on Sara for accidents when shes potty training?!?!?! Same thing right? Cept for one baby being 2 legged and 1 baby being 4 legged!!!! Seriously thinking about visiting my mother for a few days just to get away..she lives about 2  1/2 hours from us...

Im feeling hurt and angry about this...so what if ive only had her for 2 or so weeks, shes already my baby

I'm sorry, but who elected him king?  You are one half of this family.  If you cave to this, he will have dominion over everything else you do for the rest of your life, too.
Why are you "asking" instead of discussing your wishes like an adult?  Sorry, but I just don't understand how some women abdicate every ounce of their power to some man.
You are an adult.  What's he going to do if you keep your dog, shoot it?  Divorce you? If those are possibilities, I'd just hasten the process and get out while I still had a life.
No man would ever tell me to get rid of my dog and still be in my bed in the A.M.
No dog I know has ever been trained in two weeks, especially if you are re-training someone else's mistakes.  He needs to give her a break, and, frankly, he needs to treat you as an equal partner.

Why are you "asking" instead of discussing your wishes like an adult? Sorry, but I just don't understand how some women abdicate every ounce of their power to some man.

 
 
I see it all the time!

BTW, a dog that is returned to a shelter in Texas has a good chance of being euthanized.  Hope your hubby can live with that. [:@]

[color=#000000]Sorry, but I just don't understand how some women abdicate every ounce of their power to some man.
[/color]
 
While I can see where you are coming from (and I can, really), I think the tone of this post is a bit much, and the assumptions of what might happen should she keep the dog are perhaps hurtful to TinksMom, who probably loves her husband. I don't think the bit about shooting the dog was necessary.
 
But that's just me.

Weve started crate training tonight..will see how it goes.

Glad you have started.  Now the important thing is to keep learning about training and making this the best dog ever.  Did you read up on crating?  Eventually the dog should really love it like a child loves a crib...Makes it nice for all concerned!
 
editing in:  Here is a success story in progress!  [linkhttp://forum.dog.com/asp/tm.asp?m=202295]http://forum.dog.com/asp/tm.asp?m=202295[/link]

Why are you "asking" instead of discussing your wishes like an adult?  Sorry, but I just don't understand how some women abdicate every ounce of their power to some man.

 
I am going to get flamed big time, but that was way out of line, she already feels bad enough, came here for advice from people that she feels will be able to guide her and gets that? Sorry, but even secure women need advice.
 
Now about the subject, Tinksmom I feel for you, I have a pup again after 12 years, I was so use to my easy going girl that when I got the devil in a GSD coat I was very frustrated the first couple of days. Now im back in the groove so to speak. I did take one piece of advice from this board, something I had never done. I bought a crate. And it was the best advice I have ever received.
 
I want to ask you what your feeding her? The rule is the better it is going in one end the less that comes out the other end. Also do you have her on a feeding routine? Mine gets his food at 6 am and 4 pm daily, weekends and holidays, no exceptions. He gets kibble and treats between those times while we are training him, he has a HUGE food drive. It helps so so SO much when needing to know that they will have to go out. His water is restricted because he will play in it or dump it if I let him. The bowl always has "some" water in it but is never full.
 
He also wears his leash in the house and in the fenced in yard, the only time it comes off is when he is crated. I have gates for all the doorways and I also have some of Babe's old leashes attached to various things in each room so that I can tie him up if I need to restict his movement in a room. He is not allowed to free roam the house, I made the mistake of thinking he would be fine for a few min one morning while I took a shower and the results are over in the photo section under crime scene, was MY mistake, not his.
 
Good luck!
Dawn

I agree we should not bash her on her situation but help her to fix her situation.  She needs help so let's help her.

ORIGINAL: Truley



I am going to get flamed big time, but that was way out of line, she already feels bad enough, came here for advice from people that she feels will be able to guide her and gets that? Sorry, but even secure women need advice.

Agree!

I just want to add that my husband also got very frustrated when Kobi was a puppy and at times would have been glad to see him gone. Not only would he pee on the carpet but managed to destroy approx $1000 worth of stuff despite the fact that I watched him like a hawk. I think we all have puppy horror stories. By the time Kobi was 2, he and DH were best friends. Yesterday when DH came home, Kobi was not at the front door wiggling and greeting him as usual. I had actually just put his food down and dinner trumps everything. DH barely said hello to me and went looking for the dog. So hang in there and try your darnest to keep the peace. It only gets easier!

I agree w/ all of the other posters. And would like to re-iterate please don't deprive the pup of water.
Why is everybody jumping on Anne, I think we all know her perspective on this, if you've ever read any of her posts. I think the younger ladies don't get what Anne is saying because you need to get older to get it. Once the hormones aren't driving your brain, you see things differently. You don't take the same  poop that you did when you were younger. And I think Anne has seen this scenario many more times then any of  us has, in her classes.
Gina "the shoot the dog thing was to bring home the point I think that he wasn't of course going to do that so why not take the time and have a conversation like two adults about the dog situation.
Two weeks is too soon to decide if any new thing in your life is good, bad, or indifferent.
I also think this says a lot about a person's character (hubby), but like everyone else said if this dog wasn't agreed on by all parties before... we reap what we sow. But again the dog suffers sigh

Good luck with the crate training, in my experience it doesn't take longer than a week for the dog to feel comfy in it[]

Why is everybody jumping on Anne, I think we all know her perspective on this, if you've ever read any of her posts. I think the younger ladies don't get what Anne is saying because you need to get older to get it.

 
Sorry Deb, but I disagree and I'm not much younger than Anne.  Anne has some of the very best training advice anyone could hope for, but I think that sometimes the tone is condescending and/or inciteful.  I understand and appreciate her passion, just not always the way she displays it.   As we've all discussed, the internet doesn't allow for the best communication.  I don't know about anyone else, but I've been guilty of blowing my stack a time or 2 with my DH and making comments like "that's it, .....blah, blah, blah".  Perhaps that's what Tinksmom's DH did.  I just don't think that slamming her (or her DH) was helpful. 

Wendy, my experience with crate training has been very positive, and I am glad to see that you are working on it.  Especially with a young child around, it gives the dog a safe place to go when things get a little noisy or hectic.  I am confident that your husband will come to see the positive effects that it will have.  Take it one day at a time, and point out to him each day's progress and successes, and leave out anything else.  It will work!

ORIGINAL: spiritdogs

If you cave to this, he will have dominion over everything else you do for the rest of your life, too.

What's he going to do if you keep your dog, shoot it?  Divorce you? If those are possibilities, I'd just hasten the process and get out while I still had a life.

Deb, I think I may be even older than Anne. I just think her 'perspective' was a little over the top. But I do think she's a great dog trainer. Marriage counselor - maybe not so much.