Hmmmm. I, for one, appreciate knowing the date and day! Thanks for the update. My poor brain doesn't know much these days.
I slept a good solid 9 hours and still woke up feeling draggy and groggy. I guess its going to take time for my body to feel "caught up" after what it went through the past week.
When we left here last Saturday we ended up driving to VA (about 16 hours) and picking up eldest DS. That was great because he was rested and took over the driving for several hours. And, it was really nice to see him.
So wierd the people that were there for us. Really odd. Todd's ex and her husband gave us their bedroom. When we tried to give it back they wouldn't hear of it. She had reached out via facebook after the last trip, and Mike (oldest DS) has stayed with them several times since the March trip. But, giving up her bedroom, cooking us meals.....wow.
I am so pleased and proud of the man my stepson has become. I hadn't seen Rob in 7 or 8 years and he's quite the different person now. Todd is an only child and Rob HIS only child (biologically). Rob and I went through boxes and boxes of "stuff". MIL, over the years, has packed away her "treasures" and primarily all that we had to go through was that sort of thing and the last minute stuff that Rob didn't know what to do with when he packed up her apartment. When he did that, he donated much of what he found there, as per her wishes, Still, we had clothing, and about 30 boxes of stuff to sort through. I think we left 3 boxes packed, but only after we'd gone through them all. I kept telling Rob, that it wasn't my stuff to decide what to do with, that it belonged to him and his dad and I didn't want to "take over", but he was thrilled that I was willing to help, and I guess somehow it made it easier for him for it to be ME pulling stuff out of boxes and muttering and doing a bit of cussing about all that was there. 99% of the stuff went to Goodwill. There was very little that meant anything to any of us, but still, it was something that had to be done.
I've never had to take care of the end of life details before and I'm not sure how I knew what to do, but I got through it. Dozens of calls to get stuff cancelled, make arrangements for the grave to be opened, etc, but DH had to make the really difficult calls to notify family and friends. I would have been happy to do that for him, but it really was not my place to do that, and it would have been really cold to get a call from a virtual stranger. Those calls were very difficult for him.
When we were at the funeral home to take care of all the details, we had a private viewing. I think I shared this with you guys already. But, bless his heart, Rob thot about the frail old man who had been MIL's closest friend for almost 20 years and went and got Mario so he could say his goodbyes. It broke my heart to see that dear old man sitting beside her body, which was laying on a guerny.
After the little mini graveside service on Wednesday, we headed for NY city. DS was working a conference or convention or something with his first step mom. We dropped him off at his half brothers there (Chris is an actor). It was an adventure to drive through Manhatten and into Brooklyn. My heart broke to see the site of the twin towers when we passed by. And then we headed for VA. We didn't arrive until almost 5 AM and bless his heart, the other half brother Jon, was waiting up for us. He had to get up and go to work, but made it clear that we were welcome to stay as long as we wanted to stay, just hang out, chill, relax, make ourselves at home. Ummm, this is the home of MY exes ex. And we're welcome to make ourselves at home?? Wow. And of course, Jon had to have a hug from me. I can't remember the last time I saw either of those boys and it was just wonderful to be so warmly welcomed.
Now, for the more salient points of the trip. VA closes their rest areas at 7PM. WTH???? MA has rest areas with no facilities. As if you can rest with a full bladder?? And the ones that DO have bathrooms, they lock up tight after dark. GA has almost NO rest areas. I soooo hate pulling off the interstate and hitting a gas station for a bathroom when I don't need gas. And, honestly, my bladder needs to be emptied on a long trip FAR more often than the gas tank needs to be filled!
It is sooooo good to be back in my own cramped and furry home. It was heavenly to sleep in my own bed last night. Pee on my own toilet. Get up and make coffee with a maker that I didn't have to figure out......the car pretty much got emptied last night and stuff put away, for the most part.
I have everything ready to mail to the life insurance company today for her final two policies. The funeral home went ahead and submitted for BOTH the policies from John Hancock, even though one more than covered the costs. I'm glad that he did that because it saves us having to file a separate claim, and using one of the few death certificates we got and, its just one less detail for me to take care of. So, one package to mail, I need to send a check to the momument people to put the year of death in the stone, and a check to the Catholic Church as a "donation" for the deacon. How wierd really that a person can die and all the details can be done and over with in a weeks time.
So, back to real life now. Thankfully. And now I can be a little bit less of a rock for everyone else and feel what I need to feel!
And, again, I want to thank everyone here for their support throughout this past week.
Is the Tiki bar still open?????