calliecritturs
Posted : 12/1/2009 1:14:12 PM
Hi -- Chelsea emailed me last night. I am so incredibly proud of this woman. She did an incredibly difficult thing absolutely right all the way thru. She told me I could let you all know and I'm going to just paste her email in here b/c I think you will all be every bit as proud of Chelsea as I am. When something doesn't go easily, nor as "planned" and yet she held it together -- it simply demonstrates that this woman's love for her dog was SO deep and SO wide that it enabled her to go deeper than her own desires and fears *Just* to give her dog a peaceful passing:
"Okay, it's over now...
I gave her the ace and the xanax at 4, an hour before our appointment time, just like I was supposed to..but half an hour later she seemed just as alert. So I gave her another one of each (the dosage the vet gave me was 1 1/2 to 3 xanax, and 2 to 4 ace.. I gave her 2 and 3 to start), and another half an hour passed with no change...soo we gave her another one of each, and by this time it's past our appt time (but I had my Mom call the vet and they said no rush).. we finally got there around 5:30, and she was still pretty alert, though less so...
Dr. Haley came in and gave her valium, and within 5 minutes she was...not really sleeping, but verrry sedate. We had originally planned on giving the pink stuff in a back leg.. we always do blood draws and such from the back legs because she's so much less stressy about it, but her legs were swollen, and they couldn't find the vein, and Cherokee was out of it enough, so they stuck it in her front leg instead, and she was gone.. She gave a little shudder, but otherwise she was just still and calm.
I held it together pretty well.. Before I tried to sedate her at home I was kind of a mess, but for like 20 minutes before hand I just laid with her real quiet and calm..then I gave her the meds, and still was fine.. I didn't start crying til after the valium went in, and I didn't fall apart (sobbing, hyperventilating...the whole shebang..sigh) til she was gone..
I don't think it's actually hit me yet.. I keep hearing little sounds, of my nephew, another dog, or a cat, and startling like I forgot to do something with Cherokee..feed her, give her water, change her pee pads...whatever. And then I realize again that she's gone.. I still don't know what I'll do without her, but I guess I'll figure it out eventually...
You can tell the rest of the forum that she's gone if they ask. Otherwise I'll be back in a few days probably.. I just don't think I can do it right now.
Thanks so much ... for all your help."
tonight I'm going to take an I-Dog cue and I'm going to light a candle for Chelsea. Cherokee meant the world to her (far more than many of you know there's a long history here). May the light comfort and help heal her heart and may the support of all her friends help more than she'd know.