how does puppy choose his/her master?

i'm guessing you want him to be your kids and wife's dog only, correct? nothing at all wrong with that and i wont question it. to each his own, we have our reasons []
to answer your question.... there isnt really any one particular way. a dog is still much like a wolf. they look for the leader of the pack (you). think about a wolf pack. the alpha male keeps an eye on everything, makes sure nothing is out of whack, or going to cause harm, and to make sure everyone in the pack maintains respect. he is always vigilant and rarely has time for games. but when he DOES play, its a special occasion. its like.... christmas i guess. the other wolves want his acceptance and will do all kinds of things to get it.... even if he doesnt want the attention. the leader makes them feel safe and secure.. so naturally... wouldnt you want to be close to the biggest, toughest, head honcho in charge instead of being his enemy or have him feel indifferent to you?

i think, personally, its perfectly ok if he is your family's playmate during the day, but your quiet, respectful companion at night. he probably feels like king of the mountain when its just you two. you're different than the others. you arent bouncing around giggling and making goofy noises at him. i'm guessing of course.... if you dont want him to follow you around and be your shadow then you might want to consider kenneling him or teaching him to sleep in a crate at night (that is not being mean to the dog, some people think it is... but its only mean if you lock them up and forget they're there for hours upon hours because its convenient)

i dont really think he'll cling to you during the day and ignore your family. i think this is just his special time to be with the leader of his special pack and he feels safe and secure with you.

but all breeds are different. some, like rotties, will choose one member of the family as their favourite - so i have heard - but will still protect the rest of the family. i grew up with dogs, they were all MY dogs, or mine and my sisters, but when my dad was around they would all try to get his praise and acceptance, follow him, try to make him play games, anything.... even though they KNEW he wouldnt do it.... he never did play with them.. the dogs belonged to the kids and it was our responcibility to play, clean up after them, and feed them... if we failed to do that then he would threaten find homes for the dogs(which is really putting it nicely)
he would absolutely NOT participate with the animals because in his mind if he did that then his kids would assume he would do it all the time which would defeat the purpose of teaching a lesson in responcibility. "You wanted it, YOU take care of it"

thanks so much for your post reply!

i read it over a few times and you had some very good info. !

i look forward to other replies as much as I enjoyed reading your reply.


the puppy seems to only sleep if he is laying against my foot [touching me] as I type these very words. I've already discovered I can't move my foot away from him until he is indeed in a deep sleep if i want him to stay put down their and stay asleep.

i'm very tolerant of him tonight but think i'll become less tolerant of his shadowing me around in the future nights - which will either make him go away from me more or respect me more and follow me even more [the alpha male thing]. it will be an interesting experiment to me [in my mind as a science teacher] to see if he still wants to shadow me around every night if i slowly give him less affection - i'm guessing he'll disregard my subtle attempts to pay less attention to him [at night] and the pup will continue to follow me around anyways as he will someone "think" that my attempts to give him less attention is a sign from me to him that he should try to please me (me being the alpha male in his eyes) more [and thus follow me around more and try to please me more] - i'll report back how this pup psychology works out for me - LOL.

we did buy a metal cage for him to sleep in at night - but my wife said i should not stay up at night on the 1st floor [which i do every night] and also keep him in the cage while he is awake and obviously knows i am awake down here too. my wife said that it is best i keep him un-caged and only put him in the cage when i decide to go to bed - i dunno but sounds logical to me [you tell me]. just seems right that i don't keep him caged up while i'm awake at night messing around and walking around and him being awake in cage and crying to be out of cage knowing i'm also awake like he is [again you tell me]. my plan is to keep him out of cage at night when i'm awake also and then when i decide to go to bed to put him in cage and I [and family] forgets about him until we awake in morning hours [we all sleep upstairs].

i certainly understand that i could definitely separate the pup from shadowing me by simply caging him at night when I'm still awake [which I may do in future at some time] but quite honestly this first night together with pup I have actually enjoyed his companionship as it is just he and i and he certainly isn't as needy as those sleeping upstairs [my 2 young daughters and even wife]. LOL! perhaps, just maybe dog and I will be ok together after-hours and especially as he ages and becomes more and more like me - only time will tell.

i'm no expert on crating a dog, though i have done it..  i taught a jack russell puppy i had once and she looooved her crate. she would try to guard it from other dogs (she kept a milk bone stash in there and they knew it) with her crating it was only for being away from home (some people dont like dogs sleeping in their beds or on their sofas) or when i was working or in classes. i lived close by, and my room mate was usually home so someone would let her out to frisk around for a bit before going back in.
for the most part....the dog slept with me at the head of the bed. but if i was home and awake, especially when she was a puppy, she was out of the crate and with me all the time. i kept her on a leash inside the house - her by my side - to prevent any wandering off the hide presents [8|] made the house training easier. if she started sniffing around, i would know it right away.

i think eventually he'll start to recognise his place in your home but will still look to you as the "law giver"
my folks split up when i was young so every other weekend i was with my dad and half sisters and their dogs - different family structure than my home with my mom and older brother. neither one cared about dogs and didnt have time to bother. So inevitably because i took the interest in training and grooming and feeding the dogs looked at me as the boss, despite being a kid.
There was one point (with my first dog) my mom did have to show me the ropes on care so of course the dog looked at her as leader, and i was the brainless puppy.... if my mom was outside working in the garden Sandy would be laying close by in the shade. if strangers came to visit, Sandy would be between my mom and them - she almost attacked a service worker once because he got too close - She was more my mom's dog than mine you might say.
later on though, years later when i learned more about dog psychology and training my dogs all began to look at me as the boss.
 half the time they didnt show my mom any respect at all. if she was eating her dinner in front of the tv they would beg shamelessly, one would even inch closer and closer trying to steal a bite... but with me they wouldnt dare do that. they wouldnt even make eye contact with me if i was eating, and they made sure to stay on the other side of the room lol i just refused to tolerate rude dogs and they all knew it. if they tried to beg then they were sent to bedroom and werent allowed to come out till i said so - didnt even have to shut the door lol
 but my mom? sheesh [8|]she would swat at them, yell at them, push them away and they would dodge or duck, but still wouldnt clear off. Dogs KNOW who deserves respect and who doesnt. the problem was my mom no longer took an interest in them. even though she was the grown up, bread winner, adult in charge.... i was the one spending all my time with the dogs. if my mom ever fed them it was because i was out of town - and that happened maybe once or twice every other month. she just couldnt be bothered with them anymore since they were my dogs, i wanted them after all. i was practically grown so i should be the one taking care of them. not her... but there are many people here that agree that if you want your dog to show more respect to someone then you let that person take over ALL the canine care.

I think dogs pick out who is the most interesting to them. It can vary for different dogs depending on what they deem important.
 
Our first dog definately picked DH although I did ninety percent of her care. He'd come home from work and play wonderful games with her, and for her two ten minute sessions of games were more important than anything else. I was somewhat ill during her first year of life and didn't have the high energy she loves. It's changed a bit though. I've wormed my way into her heart by taking her exciting places.
 
The second dog finds me more interesting. He's far more food driven and not too interested in play time.

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I guess it's you. You want the puppy more than a pet.