Tipping Question

Although I've never waited tables, my daughter has.  So, I understand second hand what wait staff go through.  However, I always go into a restaurant with the intention of tipping 20%, if the service is good.  If it is so so, I'll tip 10-12%.  If it really stinks...nada and words with at the register.  They always ask how everything was at the register...and I always tell them frankly...good bad or ugly.

As far as takeout...we typically tip big for deliveries; and generally not when picking it up UNLESS it is a small mom and pop place.  Then, we will leave about 10%.

 I would have tipped .01, very insulting.

Yes, the servers DO depend on tips, but that should mean that they work even harder to EARN those tips.

As for having a bad day??  Get real.  My life has been pretty much in the crapper for the past year and a half, and by golly whe I'm at work, I am ON;  I don't get tips, but my customers think I'm the greatest thing since sliced bread, regardless of my mood.  If I have to fake it, I do, but typically being around people picks me right up, regardless of my crappy mood.

I fully understand they rely on tips for their wages (the car thing was just a simple comparision, nothing realistic obviously!!)

however. If I am PAYING for a service, it better darn well be a service worth paying for! I don't make a ton of money myself, and I don't have money to waste on poor service. Nor do I have the patience or tolerance for it. I would have gotten a manager long before the situation escalated as it did (I've done it before)

BEVOLASVEGAS

I left him a note of "tips" of how to better serve his customers, & a penny. 

I was going to say "a penny".  HOWEVER -- at the same time, I would **definitely** (and yes, i've done this before) hunt down the manager on duty and ask to speak **privately**.  Then I'd tell them that the service was horrible (and I'd list it all) and I'd tell them that my gut reaction is never EVER to come back, and that server ruined it for them.  Usually you'll get a special invitation back and royal treatment. 

I honestly talk to managers a LOT.  And truly -- more often for GOOD service than bad.  I try never to be so rushed that I can't be constructive.  But I never walk out "mad" without telling someone WHY because otherwise no one is going to know how bad that server is, and it will be repeated.

We rarely ever get curbside service -- I don't "tip" at a drive thru (like McDonalds).  But I *do* tip at curbside.  Why?  Because that person is simply a server who is at curbside.  They have to put your order in, go get it, package it up (the kitchen doesn't do that) and they're the ones that futz with anything special and make sure you have everything from cutlery to napkins.  In short, they do everything for you that a server woiuld do at your table EXCEPT they don't run back and forth if you want "more".  However - they DO have to make sure everything is ready all at once, and they have to pack it up WELL.  I mean if you were going T O the restaurant to eat you'd drive there.  So 'driving' doesn't make the difference.  To me the BIG difference is that curbside people don't make even minimum wage. 

 Yikes! I've never had service that bad...not sure what I would do about the tip, but I would definitely have talked to a manager about it. I wait tables for a living and have for 15 years (and yeah, I make $2.13 per hour, but if you're good the money is good)...I normally leave 20% and 15% if I think the service was bad...but that was pretty awful service you described, I'd probably leave 10% in that case, but I realize I'm just being nice because I'm in the business and most people would leave nothing. It sounds like he got slammed and had no one backing him up, busser, manager, other servers, whatever....if it's that bad the whole staff is to blame imo, including the manager, they are paid to notice stuff like that, empty drinks, people looking around for their server, they should be spotting those things and intervening before it gets to the point it did.

 To go food I tip 10-15% on...at my restaurant the people doing to go food do make minimum wage plus tips because so many people don't tip on to go food...delivery 20%, counter service like starbucks or something I might leave my change.

 My step-mom (waitress for years) said if the service is terrible to leave a penny.  That way they can't think that you just forgot.

So, if I had a penny on me (rarely have cash) that's what I would do.  

Delivery drivers I tip, carry out I don't.

I usually tend to over-tip if the service is very good (above expectations) or if it's a place I go to regularly, like the bar/restaurant overlooking the ice where BF plays hockey.  But then again, I'm friends with a couple of the waitresses who work there, because they're wives/gfs of BFs teammates.

Once my BF in college was at a restaurant with a few of his buddies.  He said the waitress was so terrible they left her a penny tip...dropped in the bottom of a half empty water glass placed strategically on top of the bill.  How's THAT for getting your message across, lol!

Only one time have I ever not tipped.  It was after a hockey game, almost the entire team and several of us gfs/wives went to a bar/restaurant owned by a fellow teammate.  There must have been 15 of us there.  Everyone ordered food, and there were several pitchers of beer ordered for the table.  Obviously, a potential table for a really big tip for the server.  Our waitress was sooooo bad....taking forever to bring orders/refills, really nasty attitude, etc.  At one point a waitress who was a friend of one of the guys stopped by to chat with him.  Our MIA waitress came running over and yelled at her in front of all of us accusing her of stealing her table!  We were all sitting around with empty glasses waiting for her to come back with our refills, and we look over and she's behind the bar playing with her hairdo in a mirror!  We had to track her down on more than one occasion.  She was just terrible.  So, when the bill came, which she had to divide up cuz not everyone had cash, the whole table agreed to not pay her a single penny in tip.  BF paid for our tab with his card, and left the tip line blank.  Big mistake...she WROTE IN a $20 tip for herself on BFs slip!!!  BF discovered it when he checked his bank account a couple days later.  Our tab was only $20...she gave herself a 100% tip!  Since BF knew the restaurant owner, he called him up and told him about it, and he fired her.

I tend to tip 20% when we eat out unless the service was horrible I will go closer to 15%.  There are times though I have left much less and probably would have done that in your case Amanda.  We eat at a lot of the same places though and often get special treatment such as being seated faster even though there is a line and we didn't call ahead.  And we get a lot of the same servers and they take good care of us.  I do not tip for takeout but so tip the pizza delivery guy and tip the change on a dollar at places like Sonic. 

 I tip my hairdresser, aesthetician and pedicure lady 20% as well.  It sounds like I am on the high side...

 Amanda, I hope your experience is better tonight.  I am dying for some sushi lately!  I need to get some soon! 

My tip starts at 15% and goes up or down depending on service. I could care less how much a server makes per hour, if I get terrible service, I tip accordingly. Now, if the server screws up once or twice and apologizes for it, then I overlook it, everyone has a bad day, but if I get terrible service and no apology, then well they clearly don't care enough to get a tip.

Yes, servers may make only $2 hour, but they go into that industry with the understanding that their tips can make or break their bank accounts. They should not expect to be able to be rude and also get a good tip. 

Wow, I sound like a b*#$$. I usually have good to great service and my tips are usually end up at 20% or over. I do like to tip well when its warranted, I know servers don't have an easy job. Fiance worked in a kitchen for many years.

On occassion I leave just change... for times where we were treated like they expected us not to tip well (ie, there was a group of teenagers or early 20s people) -- you treat me like you dont expect a tip, then you dont get one.

Usually I try to tip 15%, depends on the place and how much the bill was.  If I order something special, it had better come special (particularly if it's meat -- when I ask for no pink, and get something bloody, that is not acceptable!).  Other than checking on us and refilling drinks, I'm usually not too critical.

I feel like if we order 4 dinners, the tip should be xx.xx,  if those 4 dinners cost $80 or they cost $20, the server did the same amount of work.  I don't tip according to that, but the whole service industry is a little weird overall.  Why should servers at at a fancy place make oodles of money in tips compared to someone at a cheap place?  Same amount of work, technically.

Interesting thread, though, I enjoy seeing the different attitudes on tipping.

NicoleS

Why should servers at at a fancy place make oodles of money in tips compared to someone at a cheap place?  Same amount of work, technically.

Because the servers in a nicer restaurant should be a better quality of server.  They're held to higher standards, their people skills better be better -- jobs in GOOD places don't grow on trees, and servers often work their way up to better places.  Servers in nicer places also get stiffed bigger when idiots walk out without tipping for no reason. 

The assumption here is good vs. bad service and tipping accordingly.  But a lot of people will try to get out of tipping entirely just to be cheap.  Or if something is wrong with the meal and part of it is comp'd some peole will penalize the server  by tipping only on the "bill" rather than on what it should have cost.

David and I are both really good tippers for good service.  But we'll both mark them down for various things.  WE're also really prone to telling a server up front what's IMPORTANT to us.  If I tell you I want my soup really, really HOT, I mean it.  If I tell you not to let my husband run out of water or whatever he's drinking in addition to that -- then ... don't.  We generally "start" at 20% and then dock them from there for stuff not up to par. 

The original post up there?  First off -- we would have walked out WAY before you did -- and I would have had a LONG talk with the manager first.  (I just GOTTA get over this shyness thing, you know?  It's really debilitating to be as afraid of people as I am?? *******B-=L-AAAAAAAMMMMMMMMM******* That was lightning striking me for that porky!!)

It's funny tho -- we tend to be popular.  We have a couple of places we've been going to for years ... and last night one of the servers at Carrabbas (not our server for the evening) comes out to me and hands me a bottle of pet shampoo -- he and his wife make soap (side business) and a couple of weeks ago he and I were talking about one of his dogs with arthritis and I handed him a tiny bottle of essential peppermint oil I have that's really good for that (it's a $2 bottle -- but the guy at Morningstar will give them to me as premiums) -- no biggie.  But they KNOW we expect a lot but are willing to pay well for it, but we also make the effort to get to know them (even in a city the size of Orlando). 

My point is -- it wouldn't have bothered me one iota to have walked out of that restaurant for such appalling service (with ZERO tip or a "penny" but also a long talk with management about the lack in the entire staff who ALLOWED this guy to consistently avoid you -- whoever mentioned it above was right -- the OTHER servers should have backed this guy up!!).  But on the other hand I think it's important to reward good service too.

But no -- servers in a nicer restaurant are there for a reason -- you can work a room and make good tips at Dennys or Perkins ... but mostly they don't.  But there are some folks who PREFER to work there rather than a higher end place.    They may feel more at ease with the clientele at one place over another.

I never thought of tipping for takeout.  Hmmmmm.

I usually drop a tip at Starbucks or Dunkin.  On the very rare occassions that we do eat out, I tip 20%. More if the service is exceptional, but by golly, it drops like a rock from a skyscraper when the service is sub standard.

glenmar

but by golly, it drops like a rock from a skyscraper when the service is sub standard.

You DO have a way with words, Glenda!

NicoleS

  Why should servers at at a fancy place make oodles of money in tips compared to someone at a cheap place?  Same amount of work, technically.

Actually sometimes it's more work.   The cheaper places are more likely to be the places where people bring kids.  Ever been in a place where there are two or three baseball or soccer teams having an end-of-the-season party? Yikes!!!  If the size of the tip is going to be based on the size of the bill of course the people who work in the pricier restaurants are going to get bigger tips, especially if there's a bar tab. If it isn't going to be based on the tab, everyone would be either seriously under or over tipping.  How would you ever be able to  determine what size tip to leave?

Joyce