My mom's heart attack and other news (final update page 4!!)

GeorgAnne, you have tons of good, healing, positive energy coming to your mom, you, your sisters, your mom's sisters, and everyone else who cares for your mom and you.  I have faith in the heart specialists of today and will send good thoughts that the doctors caring for your mom have God's assistance in restoring her health and well-being. 

I think the advice to talk to your mom while she's in this medically induced coma is good.  Remind her that no matter how strong you are, that you still need her here with you. Big Hugs!!!!!!!

Best wishes for your mom & entire family!

Well, it's been almost 5 days now.  She is still not awake, although she has been opening her eyes and looking at us. 

They are talking about MONTHS of getting better; hospitals, in home nurses, etc.

My aunts and I are tying to figure out how to peacefully get my 14 year old sis to come and stay with me.  She is at the house now with my other sister, her bf, and her twins.  It would be better for all involved if she was with me and my husband, but I know she won't come easily. She has been getting herself into trouble these last couple of years and she needs an adult to take care of her, which my 20 year old sister is NOT (even though she has kids).  So, tomorrow will be rough...

 I'm so sorry :(

Can you phrase it like *you* are the one who needs *her*? Something like, "I really want family close right now, and sister XYZ is so busy with her twins... would you be okay to come and stay with me for a while? I really want to be with you." That sounds kind of corny, but... maybe if you could make it like this is for you as much as it's for her, maybe she'd be more willing?

I'm sorry that your mom's improvement hasn't been greater but it does sound like there's improvement, so that's good news.

I think Cita's suggestion is a good one. You'll need the whole family to pull together on this and many other issues, so I'd hope they'd support you in this request. The last thing any of you need at this point is to have another person to worry about.

 I just caught this and wanted to add my prayers and good vibes to others in the hope that your mom will come out of this and be better soon.  I really like Cita's suggestion on how to deal with your younger sister.  No teen wants to be told what to do, but they often will come around if their help is sought.  Anyway, I know how hard this is for you and have you in my thoughts...

Georgie I had no idea this was happening. I'm so sorry about this and your mom, you and your family are in my prayers from now on. I know how this things are and how exhausting this is. Try to get all the sleep you can (I know how hard this is) and make a plan with your family about what are you guys going to do. I still think that you should talk to your mom, not asking questions or seeking an answer, but saying how much you all want her back, touch her hand and talk a lot. With your sister, try to find understanding with your other sister and ants, so they will support you to make the decissions and changes, Cita's suggestion is very good.

I'll be thinking about you and praying   ((hugs))

I'm just seeing this today too, so definitely good thoughts are coming for you, your mom and the rest of your family. I think Cita had a great idea too.  If your little sister thinks you need her instead of feeling like she's coming with you because she's less likely to get in trouble she's more likely to want to come.

Joyce

Oh no! I'm so sorry to hear that! I can't imagine how scary that would be. Your family will definitely be in my thoughts and prayers.

We're saying prayers too...
This is a time where you all need each other, stay strong!!!

Thoughts and prayers for your mom...

 Yeah, Cita's right but don't tell her you need her "help" doing dishes or some such.  Simply tell her "ok, those guys have each other and ___has her kids, but honestly *I* need someone who knows Mom with ME too -- I feel pretty alone in this.  Could you ... dang, I don't want to sound weird, but would you come stay with ME."  Yeah, I have ____ (s.o.) but he's not you and I'm worried about Mom and we're sisters and man, I'd love to have you stay with ME.  Would you ... please?"

 All my prayers for a complete and speedy recovery for your Mom.

She is starting to wake up!!!  Yesterday she was nodding yes and no to questions so she can at least understand us.  The one thing that concerns me is that she still isn't moving things when asked.  Hopefully that improves with time.  I'm sure she is scared and confused about what has happened. I don't know that anyone has explained what happened to her.  She also still gets pretty uncomfortable when she wakes up so they are still sedating her when that happens.  She is also breathing on her own for the most part, but the ventilator is still down her throat.

My sister is a whole other story.  I won't go into the whole thing because it would take forever to type out here, but we are making progress.  She feels more comfortable at home with my other sister, but there is no way that can continue (she is not a role model type person and my youngest sis has gotten herself into enough trouble at 14 already) AND she has newborn twins, there is no way they could afford to keep her. 

My DH had a talk with her yesterday about coming to stay with us...he is really awesome with that sort of stuff.  I think that because he's been through the loss of both parents at young ages and through other things they are going through, that she tends to listen to him and talk to him.  She is coming for dinner and to stay overnight tonight so we'll see how things go.  It could be months, possibly 6 months to a year, for my mom to be back on her feet and able to care for my sister.

Good luck with your sis, I hope your DH can convince her to stay with you.

From her reaction you would think we torture her over here.  I even offered to let her paint her bedroom and set it up however she wants.  We have a 4 bedroom house so it's not like we don't have the space.  She will just be losing a lot of the freedoms she had at my mom's house.  My mom has always been way too lenient and it shows in both of my sisters.  I had my dad around until I was almost 21 so he kept me in line.  My sister won't be with her friends 24/7 and that I think is her biggest issue.  But she really needs to focus on school; her grades just keep getting lower and lower and unfortunately my mom has her in cyber school, which I said from the beginning was a HUGE mistake.  You need to be self motivated to keep up with that, and she is not.  Plus, there is no extra curricular activities since she isn' in the school.  DH has been trying to get her interested in sports because she is so tall and lean, but she wants no part of it.  I think she is scared of starting with a group of people she doesn't know.  None of her friends have any interests, unless you count smoking and going on "walks"...  So, now I have this poor messed up kid who doesn't want to live with me because she will lose a lot of the freedoms she had before.