Domestic abuse (LovinMyLife)

    • Gold Top Dog

    LovinMyLife
    The last time I told him that I wanted to separate he told me that he would kill himself if I did.

     

    That's emotional blackmail. Remember, you are only responsible for your own actions, you are not responsible for his, or anyone else's. This is likely an idle threat designed to manipulate you and make you feel bad, but even if he really means it and were to actually try something so desperate, it is NOT YOUR FAULT. Please get help as soon as possible.

    • Gold Top Dog

    what a horrible situation you are in. i just wanted to offer you my support as well. feel free to PM me if you want to talk. i just wanted to say, that staying with your friend MIGHT not be a good idea, because it could give him leverage in a costudy battle potentially. definately talk that through with a lawyer. i really think you HAVE to leave though. he treats you horribly and is starting with you kids as well. i really would offer you a place to stay, but i guess i'm a bit too far away... please keep us updated... i'm pretty worried about you...

    • Gold Top Dog

    Take care of yourself, and **take care of your kids** and get out of there ASAP! To be able to stick things out this long you most certainly are strong enough to go it on your own.

    As for the suicide threats? The police in my hometown actually came and gave a presentation to my high school about that. They said, 100% without a doubt don't even think about it, that if someone threatens suicide if you do or don't do something, you call 911. If you are driving the car out the driveway and your husband says "I'll kill you" or "I'll kill myself," you call 911 and tell them what's happening and they *will* take care of you. They do not take such things lightly.

    A battered women's shelter sounds like a very good solution - they are very experienced in situations such as yours and will know how to keep you safe and in a good place.

    Hugs and best wishes to you and your children.

    • Gold Top Dog

    I have been in a relationship with a violent partner and I am currently in school to help women like us.   I think it is amazing that your friend is looking out for you and also that you recognize what is happening.    I urge you to look into organizations for women leaving intimate partner violence - these can help you with counselling for you and your children, housing, referrals to shelter, any social assistance you may need, etc.    They will also help you come up with a plan to stay safe.    I'm not sure where you live, but if you want to PM me I can help you look for places you can contact or you can call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE and they can make referrals for you as well as talk to you about your situation.

    Suicide threats are extremely common and they are emotional abuse in and of themselves.   Women's organizations and counsellors can help you cope with this. 

    What you are doing is incredibly brave. 

    One word of advice is to cover your tracks online when you write about this and if you look up information on any computer he has access to.   Clear your temp files, cache, etc. 

    As for custody issues, women's organizations dealing with intimate partner violence can give you advice on this, provide you with free legal advice or refer you to legal aid and a lawyer.   However, as a rule it is best to be the first to file.

    • Gold Top Dog

     Ah Sweetie, I'm so sorry this is happening to you.  Truley I am.  I really wish there was something I could do.  If you were up here, I could get you an apartment easy. 

    One thing I haven't seen mentioned so far(though I may have skimmed a few posts) is to make a report about the abuse to the police and get it on file.  That will help as far as any ensuing custody battles go.  If you just up and leave without anything being on file, he may very well turn around and try to nail you with kidnapping, especially if you have to leave the state for help.   

    • Gold Top Dog

    Also, here is a directory of Safe Haven programmes for the pets of women leaving abuse:

    Online Directory of Safe Haven Programs

    I wanted to say some things about some of the suggestions:   the #1 priority is staying safe.   Sometimes a woman feels safer reporting abuse after she has a safe place to stay, sometimes she never wants to report it, sometimes she fears reporting may cause her abuser to retaliate further.   Sometimes she fears calling 911 on her abuser for any reason, including his suicide threats, will result in retaliation.    So while each suggestion is clearly well-intended, there are very real safety concerns many women have and that's okay.   You do what you think is best for your situation.  No one - police or counsellors or anyone else - should pressure you into doing anything you don't think is right for you.  If you do not want to make a police report at this time, you can still record abusive incidents toward you or your children, including threats.   An organization dealing with violence against women will be able to advise you further, particularly about child witness laws in your state and how that may affect custody issues.  

    • Gold Top Dog

    Thanks so much you guys! It means alot to hear your encouraging words. I haven't filed a police report, I thought the police only get invloved if there was physical violence? I could be wrong though...

    Anyway I have to get off the computer, he is on his way home and he is pissed at me right now so I have to go deal with him.

    Thanks again and I will talk to everyone tomorrow!

    • Gold Top Dog

    Please before you get off, clear your internet temp files and make sure your password to this forum is not saved! Clear your cache!  

    • Gold Top Dog

    LovinMyLife
    I thought the police only get invloved if there was physical violence? I could be wrong though...

    I think this may be true and I wouldn't want you to stir up trouble (in his eyes) and then have no where to go. Because he hasn't physically hurt you, my suggestion is to take some time and think thru how best to detach from this relationship. Is there any type of free counseling available where you are. I think calling an abuse hotline might give you a lot of useful information. I don't think that moving in with the male friend is a good idea for a multitude or reasons, but mostly because it just complicates things and you don't need that. You need a plan and you really need someone to give you some support right now. Do you have any friends (preferrably female) that you can talk to? Don't do anything that will endanger you or your children but do start formulating a plan of action. Being a mom means you have great organizational skills, so use them now. I'm really sorry that you're going thru this but I hope you know that you're strong and capable and you are going to figure out how to take care of yourself and your children. If you know what pushes his buttons, avoid that. It doesn't make you weak but it does make you smart and it keeps you safe until you can figure things out. My thoughts are with you and as others have said, we're here to help in any way we can.

    • Gold Top Dog

    LovinMyLife

    Thanks so much you guys! It means alot to hear your encouraging words. I haven't filed a police report, I thought the police only get invloved if there was physical violence? I could be wrong though...

     

    Things that are reportable offenses include making threats against you and forcing you to have sex.   Both of these are illegal and you can absolutely go to the police about them.   However, if you do decide that this is something you would like to do, it is a good idea to have the strongest possible case, including any physical evidence or witnesses, and have a plan for what to do if the police can't or don't handle it in the way you would like.  Two likely reactions from abusive men after police involvement are either escalation or a honeymoon period and both require that you have a lot of support to keep yourself safe.

    • Gold Top Dog

    There are an unbelievable number of us on here who have "been there done that SURVIVED IT" -- my ex wasn't physically abusive (as in violent) -- but he was all the rest.  His thing was sympathy -- threatening suicide, belittling me, telling me it was all my fault, etc.

    There's a fine line between thinking it thru and being safe.

    1.  Given the history of threats, *do not* go to this male friend.  Let him take the dogs (and with particular care that the ex may try to hurt the dog to hurt you so tell this guy to expect it and be careful).  Going to a male will make the bad situation worse and it will weaken your position greatly.

    2.  Report the threat of physical harm and the sexual stuff to the cops.  Make sure you write down who you speak to, what time, etc.  In fact, start a notebook and keep it with you AT ALL TIMES. 

    3.  A shelter is definitely the place for you with all the threat of physical violence and his aggravated behavior around the kids.  They can and will keep you safe and that's important. 

    4.  TUESDAY (Monday is a holiday), get a post office box in your name only.  If you have anything in your name -- any kind of loan, any bill, anything at all, have it go to that P.O. Box.  But even if you don't have any, a PO box is your best friend.  You can get money there, you don't have to reveal it to a soul -- but it gives you an anchor that he can't get to. 

    5.  If at all possible take some money and open your own bank account.  Ir can be at your normal bank -- just in YOUR name and tell them to flag it because you are in a domestic crisis.  But no one but you can withdraw money, and no changes can be made without a password. 

    6.  If you have a car, make sure you change the address for payments to the PO box -- scorned men get nasty.  They'll steal bills and notices so that payments are late. 

    7.  Think twice before you leave -- even if you have to borrow $200, go and get a consult with an attorney.  You don't have to pay for an entire divorce -- just sit down for 1/2 hr (call and tell them you want to buy half an hour of their time -- that you are in a domestic violence situation and you want to leave but leave safe and smart). 

    They will tell you how to go about this.  They will tell you what laws in your state YOU must satisfy and what is illegal that you don't have to put up with from your husband.  They will tell you what NOT to do and what TO do in order to protect yourself. 

    Don't try to go in on a free consult -- pay but just ask for like 1/2 hr.  You'll get far more than your money's worth.  Only use legal aid if you have absolutely NO One to borrow money from (and if that's the case, PM me and we'll talk -- I'd bail you out in a heartbeat cos I've BEEN there).  Legal aid is fine in some situations, but if your husband is working and you aren't already on welfare then go with a paid attorney at least to start.  Then, if you have to use legal aid once you get into a shelter fine -- but get the basics of what you need to do and what TO and NOT TO do first. 

    In most states you can work towards getting your own divorce.  You can at least begin it. 

    8.  Don't telegraph to your husband that you're doing this.  Lie like a rug if you need to -- but let everything be fine and dandy.  Be smart.  Think ahead. 

    9.  After you get away from him DO NOT TALK TO HIM.  You have a history of leaving and then caving in -- That's the cycle you have to breakA lot of states/counties have packets at the Clerk of the Court -- it will give you the forms and info you need. 

    10. Someone said it above -- don't cross state lines. 

    11.  Give your family and  your friend contact information.  But also take the numbers of a few online friends -- people who won't mind if you call them collect (I'm volunteering). 

    Friends can sometimes go missing in circumstances like this.  Many of them may fear your husband.  But this is where internet friends can be REALLY handy -- husband doesn't know us and can't touch us.  But you can get a TON of support this way. 

    But mostly let people know where you are.  Let folks keep track of you so that if you go missing they'll find you.  It's worth gold in your situation.

    Take care hon -- email me ANY time.  Callie  (check your PMs)

    • Gold Top Dog
    Oh boy I am so, so sorry. I have been through something similar..the first guy I ever had a serious relationship was very abusive towards me, emotionally and physically. Leaving was the hardest thing I have ever done. By the way you describe your husband, I am almost certain that this will escalate to physical violence, especially if you try to leave while he is home. Please pack your things and leave while he is GONE. I tried to leave once when my BF was home and he put my head through the car window(and then carried me inside and made sure I didn't go to sleep because he likely gave me a concussion :/ )
    "Well, the friend that told me that I should be treated better told me that if I need somewhere to go, I could stay at his house. He lives alone and has 3 extra bedrooms. "
    DO NOT DO THIS. If you leave your husband he will file for custody just to spite you. The simple fact that you are living with another man that you are not married to will discredit you and he will take your kids. Let the pups go to your friends house, but do NOT stay there, not even if you think your husband doesn't know about it.
    Callie gave very good advice about the P.O. box and the bank accounts/bills.
    Do not listen to him saying you can't take care of yourself. You CAN, and you WILL! And don't listen to him when he says he'll kill himself. He doesn't want to kill himself, he wants you to feel bad for him. Once when I told my ex I was leaving him he came to my parent's house (where I had gone) and told me he would kill himself and got a knife and started cutting himself up. I called a friend and when she pulled up he got in his car and left. He didn't want to kill himself he wanted me to feel bad and be with him so he would stop.
    Is there anyway you could get anything he says on record? Maybe you could get one of those machines that will record your phone calls at your house? Or even just a small recorder in your pocket..but it would help you a lot in court during the divorce/custody battles which he sounds like he will really fight if you had "proof" that he was verbally abusive to you.
    If there is anything you need please let me know. Also, change all the passwords to anything you have online, and to your email...especially if you have having these replies notifications emailed to you.
    • Gold Top Dog

    I too am a member of the been there, done that, bought the t shirt, club.

    My first husband was abusive.  Let me tell you that it ALWAYS starts with mental and emotional abuse.  A man cannot hit a woman and "get away with it" ie: we make excuses for them, unless he has emotionally degraded her to the point that she thinks that she DESERVES to be hit.  That she deserves to be told that she is fat, lazy, ugly, stupid, can't survive without him, etc, etc, etc.

    I'll not go into everything the jerk did, but yes, there was rape, when he'd come home reeking of another woman who he'd just been with and want more from me......there were beatings that left me hospitalized and my daughter born too early and dead, and she was the result of a rape AFTER I left him, there were kidnappings of my kids.....lots of horrible stuff, but what finally MADE me leave was when my 3.5 year old son apologized for not protecting me from daddy.  That was my wake up call.  I sent my children out of state to live with a relative, I got MY stuff together and I finally was able to leave.  This was 28 years ago when police wouldn't do anything unless they witnessed the beating.....when Judges only reluctantly gave Orders of Protection IF you looked like raw meat from the latest beating, when kids weren't "kidnapped" because after all, he was their parent too......things have changed for the better for battered women, but gosh darn it, you still have to get your ducks in a row.

    And you have to leave.  It isn't safe for you or your children to stay.  He hasn't started hitting....yet.....but he will.  Please get yourself safe before that happens.  Cut the cord and KEEP it cut.  If he wants to see the kids, make the exchange through a third party so that YOU don't have to see him.  If his child support is late, a third party should call about it.  If there are issues with the kids that need discussing, again, a third party or via US mail.  Talking to the man is NOT in your best interest.  SEEING him, at all, for any reason, outside of a court room, could be extremely dangerous.

    He isn't going to change because he can't change.  He doesn't see anything WRONG with himself.....just with you.  And I'm betting that his crazy mother reinforces him.....supports him in everything he does and thinks that YOU are the problem.  That was the case with me.  She happened to be visiting and I was doing a zillion things at once, while HE sat on his butt reading the paper.  One of my boys got hurt, and of course it was MY fault that I wasn't watching him.  When I pointed out that HE was just sitting there NOT doing a zillion things he threw me to the floor and choked me almost to the point of passing out.  Mother dearest?  She told me "its that MOUTH OF YOURS"!!  Get yourself together.  Do whatever you need to do legally, and GET OUT.  While you still can.  PLEASE dont believe anything this man says.  He won't change, he doesn't love you...he OWNS you.  He isn't capable of love if he is doing things that hurt you.

    I'm here anytime, via pm or phone.  And yes, you can call me collect.

    • Gold Top Dog

    You all made me cry. I have never been in this type of relationship, but my sister did. Once.

    My sister had a run in with a BF in her teenage years that was this way, and then he actually hit her. She had the wits to run to the nearest safe place which was my work, got behind a bullet proof locked room ( I ran a gas station at the time) and had the attendant call both the police and myself.

    By the time I got there the police had him in a cruiser and EMS looking at my sister. Since I knew the police officers in this small little town, they knew what would have happened if I had got there first. They very politely turned their backs and tuned out what I said to that young man. And I meant every word. The only other person who knew of this was 1 brother.

    The advice from the ladies in this thread is awesome. I can offer nothing more than support and prayers for you.

     

    • Gold Top Dog

    As a mother, you are usually awarded primary custody. The best he could is shared custody. Seriously, you would have to be a convicted murder awaiting sentencing for a court to even consider terminating your parental rights.

    As for being on your own, check this out.

    My mother was married at 17 and had me at 18. My younger brother was born two years later. She and my dad divorced when I was 3. My mom, having married at 17, had no high school diploma or GED and never did. And she managed to get a job as a key punch operator in the data processing dept of Phillips 66 back in the days of the IBM 360 Mainframe series of computers (back when dinosaurs still roamed the earth.) And eventually taught herself COBOL, FORTRAN, Assembler, RPG, and RPG II. And eventually became a systems engineer, creating software systems for Firstbank and NBC back in the early 80's. Without even a high school diploma. She held us to high standards because she held herself to high standards. The only person that can tell you that you can't do something is yourself. So, don't sell yourself short.

    You like walking dogs? Be a dogwalker. You like grooming? Be a groomer. You like digging ditches whether it's 16 F or 100 F? Be an electrician. Big Smile As an apprentice, you will get plenty of that. Devil If your marriage is not happy, that will translate itself to the kids. While I agree that your husband might be contributing to you lack of self-confidence, let him be the only one doing that.

    You're smart, capable, caring and you can do anything you want to do. You're here, aren't you? The first step in your own march to self-reliance.