Dog Community

BF had a freak out...

Posted : 4/25/2006 9:01:35 AM

So we're moving this weekend. We have about 1/2 the house packed and I have a feeling most of the rest will just get shoved in a car to drive to the new place. It's only like 10 miles, if that.

Well I have a lot of stuff going on every week. I like to be busy but lately I've been really busy. So last night I had some work stuff to do, tonight is Sister night and I won't be home, tomorrow is riding lessons and Thurs I usually go to agility practice, but I'm not this week cause we're moving.

So last night my BF comes up to me and is like, 'so let me get this straight, you were busy yesterday, you were busy tonight, you're gone tomorrow, Wed and Thurs. WHEN are we going to finish packing?' The reason this is so distressing to me is that he NEVER freaks out. He never gets uptight or worried or anything, that's MY job. And I'm finally like, ya know, we have a week to move and if it takes that long so be it. I'm not going to stress about it because I just make myself sick. Then he freaks out! Ugh I can't win! lol...

glenmar

Posted : 4/25/2006 9:08:36 AM

Here is my moving philosophy....if the move is even slightly local, I wanna get in ahead of time and CLEAN, get whatever stuff I can pre-move, moved and put away, and get at least the kitchen and one bathroom totally functional. We aren't moving for almost a month and all but the bare essentials are packed to go. And as soon as Frank leaves for FL DH will be taking a load to drop off every single day. I'd rather have less stuff to use until we GET moved than have a ton of last minute packing and clutter to deal with. If this is your first move with the BF apparently that's HIS philosophy too!

tashakota

Posted : 4/25/2006 9:16:46 AM

It's our second. The first was even worse and more last minute. Previously, we lived in my house, he made an offer on a house kind of on a whim, but it was accepted. So then we moved all our stuff in two days, helter skelter. Our friends showed up to help and we hadn't packed anything! So I understand he wants this to be different but we've already packed a ton of stuff. Most of what's left is stuff we use on a daily basis. Or stuff that can just be put in a car.

It's amusing as well as unsettling because the roles are reversed here.

glenmar

Posted : 4/25/2006 9:24:22 AM

See, I'd be totally freaking if my move were that close! I'm ADHD and clutter drives me NUTS......last minute stuff drives me NUTS, and tossing last minute stuff in the car helter skelter....well, then I've gotta sort it all to put it away and that drives me NUTTIER!!

This is how anal I am....I know already on X day, we will drain our water bed, takeit apart the next morning and move it to the new house, put it together and fill it. We'll sleep in the motorhome until we actually DO move, but the bed is being drained on Friday, moved and reassembled on Saturday and by Monday, when I want to sleep in it, it'll be nice and warm. A month away and I absolutely know what closets and cupboards everything will go into....but I HAVE to move this way or it's absolutely overwhelming to me.

tashakota

Posted : 4/25/2006 9:31:06 AM

Oh I will probably freak out once we get all the stuff moved and I have to unpack it all but I'm trying to be less stressed. BF thinks I'm a worry wort and I probably am but this time, I'm just relaxin'. We're going in Fri night to vaccum and clean, etc. Then Sat morning, we begin moving. Really all we need for Sat night is a mattress to sleep on. But we don't agree on where stuff is going to go yet, so that's a problem. Even the master bedroom. So I imagine Fri night we'll hash that out. I'm not looking forward to moving and I wish we weren't because I'll miss certain aspects of our current house. But the new one has a lot fewer flower beds to stress me out. I hate weeds and the 10+ flower beds at our current place are too much. I think the new place has 3.

danehaven

Posted : 4/25/2006 9:34:25 AM

I say give BF some boxes. [sm=wink.gif]

rwbeagles

Posted : 4/25/2006 9:37:54 AM

I've never, ever moved and NOT had a fight...this goes back to my childhood days of our moving, lol! Moving is a highly stressful event and it's not pretty....so I don't see anything out of the ordinary here. Part of relationship is being able to freak out occasionally and have the person love you after and forgive you and you can laugh about it [

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glenmar

Posted : 4/25/2006 9:42:41 AM

Oh, absolutely agree with that, but, with a caveot. If HE packs it, he MUST unpack it. When we moved out here, DH absolutely STUFFED two wardrobes with all kinds of crap, and they sat in the bedroom for weeks. They were NOT packed the way I would pack them and I flat out was NOT gonna dive into that kind of mess.

DS is the same way. He wants to wait til the last minute and then leaves the boxes sitting there until they drive me crazy and I do it myself. THIS time, I've already packed the bulk of his stuff. I left him clothing, but that's about it! So, if I end up having to UNPACK, at least it's packed MY way.

tashakota

Posted : 4/25/2006 9:46:36 AM

Oh we've already had our spats and made offers on 4 different houses and had two offers on our house fall through. This has been a process since last October. We've made it this far and we'll make it all the way through.

Glenda, I agree with you. He packs his stuff and I pack mine. I just have more "junk" than he does, according to him.

I have dog stuff, collectibles, baskets, books, etc. He has 7 cases of empty beer bottles for brewing, plus all the equipment and gaming stuff. So we both have "junk" it's just different stuff.

I started packing my stuff a month ago. The rest now is kitchen, bath and then moving laundry, clothes, furniture, etc. Heck I began packing back in Nov when I though we were moving then! lol...

Firestorm

Posted : 4/25/2006 10:41:18 AM

Well if he is freaking out then he can start packing some of the stuff himself and take it over. Get him helping instead ofletting freak out.

cakana

Posted : 4/25/2006 10:45:05 AM

I totally agree about how stressful moving is but I think it has it's upside too. I'm a very clutter-free person but my husband likes to hang on to things. Moving is a great time to get rid of all the "stuff" that you haven't touched since the last move [

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tashakota

Posted : 4/25/2006 11:08:54 AM

Oh I agree! And we have. I just never realized how many books I have. And I don't need them, but they hand on anyway.... oh well. I didn't think we had a lot of just "stuff" type stuff but I guess we do. And moving is very stressful. Up until this point, I was the one "freaking" out because all these things just kept happening and we weren't sure if we had a place, then the house we're buying had all kinds of issues, and it just kept getting worse. Now that I know we're closing on Fri on both houses, I've relaxed a bit.

Firestorm, he's been packing too. He's just feeling like I"m too busy to help.

He packed most of the garage so far. I've done other stuff. It's all perspective I guess. He sees this final week as the week to get all this done and I've been doing a little here and a little there all along.

Firestorm

Posted : 4/25/2006 11:22:10 AM

LOL, then I guess you got yourself a keeper if he is helpful. Moving can be stressful but it will all be done and over soon.

tashakota

Posted : 4/25/2006 11:23:47 AM

Yeah he is.

Both helpful and a keeper! [

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I can't wait until next week is over!!! lol...

probe1957

Posted : 4/25/2006 12:55:30 PM

WHAT??? You are living with a guy you aren't married to? Does your mother approve of this? Next thing you know, you'll be having sex with him. [

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