Human Nutrition

It's just my health should come first above everything but I've come very close to completely ignoring my health.

 
The good news is that once you start on the path to healthier eating, it really has it's own momentum.  It's one thing to blindly eat junk food and unhealthy snacks when you're not aware of how many wasted calories you're taking in.  Once you tune in to it though, it's just not very enjoyable, and that's a good thing.  It's one of the reasons Weight Watchers works for so many people.  They don't really say "eliminate chocolate", but when you calculate your daily allowance and realize you can't have any dinner if you eat the chocolate, it hits home.
 
I totally agree with Sylvia's (ashland) advice on the books and magazines.  I subscribe to Health right now, but I've taken Shape and Self magazine before and really loved them both.  I just read in the newspaper this weekend that subscribing to a fitness magazine helped people lose weight and get in shape.  I get upset at the covers of the magazines, even Shape for example.  They often have some skinny woman in a bikini on the cover, but the magazine itself has some great articles and some great recipes too.

ORIGINAL: cakana

I totally agree with Sylvia's (ashland) advice on the books and magazines.  I subscribe to Health right now, but I've taken Shape and Self magazine before and really loved them both.  I just read in the newspaper this weekend that subscribing to a fitness magazine helped people lose weight and get in shape.  I get upset at the covers of the magazines, even Shape for example.  They often have some skinny woman in a bikini on the cover, but the magazine itself has some great articles and some great recipes too.

 
I agree. Shape always has women in bikinis on the cover. Self is better about that. I also subscribe to Runner's World (for the marathon) and Prevention (those are the little ones you see at the checkout in the grocery stores). Prevention is a great little magazine. I've never even heard of Health. I'm gonna look into that one. The Weight Watchers one is great. I love it.

ORIGINAL: jenhuedepohl
Ixas_Girl - have you heard of Flylady? She does a phenominal e-mail list that is EXACTLY what you talked about. I have kind of fallen off the Flylady wagon, but many of the habits & routines I picked up when I joined have still stuck with me. This is a link if anyone is interested: [linkhttp://www.flylady.net]FlyLady[/link]

Wow! she's ... fly! Love it! Her book Body Clutter sounds great! " Dealing with your Body Clutter is not about the "perfect" diet; it is about sound nutrition, personal discovery and a journey that only you can take. It's not about the fat, it's about life."

I signed up for her mailing list. Thanks, Jen!

I'm struggling with this too.  I've been hiking and we've been walking in between hiking trips very often over the past couple of months.  And, I thought this would be the perfect time to start eating better too since I'm already moving a lot.  I started Weight Watchers (for like the 90th time). 
 
I'm really glad you started this, lots of good  info here. 
Thanks! 
Lori
 
PS--Willow's watching her weight too, she needs to take off about 1.5 lbs. 

Check with your doctor before you go on a diet, just to see if there are any health related concerns you might have.  At your university, if there is a dietetics program, you could ask one of the grad students to help you design a program that you could live with.

This is really good advice, hint hint Nutritionists are actually pretty reasonable to just pay out of pocket if you just want to meet once or twice. If you check on the web and can find a nearby nutrition masters/PhD program I be you would be able to get it for way cheaper. The great thing about working with new nutritionists or students at the end of their program is they are really motivated and will be "all over you" in a good way!! It may be a good idea to stop by barnes and noble and buy a book or two as well. Try to get one where the author is a RD or PhD. There is a lot of stuff published by people who don't have the training/experience to back up their claims IMO.

I second (or third?) the food journal idea.  It uts it all into perspective, and if you do see a nutritionist I would imagine they would want you to start one so they know what you are eating, when and how much.  It sounds like you like healthy food but need help utting it together.  I get a lot of recipes from [linkhttp://www.foodtv.com]www.foodtv.com[/link] and [linkhttp://www.allrecipes.com]www.allrecipes.com[/link].  There's a get healthy section on the foodtv website and a healthy living and a healthy eating section on allrecipes site. 
 
My biggest tip is don't go to the grocery store hungry.  That's when I buy crap and then regret it later.
 
 

My biggest tip is don't go to the grocery store hungry. That's when I buy crap and then regret it later.

No kidding. Geez! If I'm hungry, I'll go out to eat BEFORE I go shopping. It's cheaper, and healthier.  I had to stop buying boxes of junk food.

I don't really know where else to post this but I really do need to get it out and part of the reason I want to loose weight is because of this.
 
I made my BF a promise that I would become healthier and loose some weight.  That was about 2 years ago.  Since I have only gained and I can't figure out why.  Now he is upset because not only did I break the promise but I made the problem worse.  He just recently stopped telling me he loves me because he says I lied to him.  I made a promise, something I don't do often to help our relationship and I couldn't do that simple thing.  He says he doesn't want a relationship where I am unhealthy and will die early, a relationship that he has to worry about me becoming diabetic, he want a physically healthy relationship.  He says it's hard to care about me when I don't show that I care about myself.  Our sex life has suffered greatly because of my weight gain.  When I finally ask why he doesn#%92t love me any more he only said "I love you only as a friend."  That hurt me so much to hear him say that.  I know he's incredibly stressed right now and the both of us hardly see each other now as much as we have in months past because of how busy the both of us are.  I am only hoping that once he is done with school and finishes he double major (BioChem/Psychology) we can work on our relationship and I can finally do what I promised and get this extra weight off of me.  When I met him 4 1/2 years ago I was 80 lbs lighter and we had a great relationship, then suddenly I started to gain weight and well... I would say our relationship was great up until the point that he starting bringing up my weight.  I am short as it is and I gain very easily.  I don't want to be heavy but I don't know what to do anymore, I'm loosing the one person I care about because of how unhealthy I#%92ve allowed myself to become.  He is not unreasonable but to him the fact that he sees it as a lie makes him angry.  Yes, I did promise to loose weight and it seems like all the problems that come up in our relationship stem around my weight. 
 
He is extremely healthy, goes to the gym, bikes, keeps a food journal and eats only healthy food.  He can't understand why I can't do it.  Also being the weight that I am I can't keep up with him while hiking and biking, he has to slow down to my level and gets upset at all the breaks we have to take.  I want to become more active but I also feel that perhaps I am holding him back because I just can't keep up to his level, I once didn't have that problem.  He sees my weight as selfish; by being heavy every one around me has to suffer.  In a way to him it#%92s not really how much I weight but how healthy I keep myself and I can honestly say I haven#%92t been doing that great of a job of it but I can#%92t stand how much my relationship has suffered because of my health.
 

ORIGINAL: jenhuedepohl

I subscribed to MenuMailer at savingdinner.com. It's a service that sends you a menu, recipes and even a shopping list for a week's worth of dinners. All are healthy and balanced and created by a nutritionist. They have several versions, including a Low Carb , Vegetarian, Heart Healthy, Budget, etc. VERY handy for me and works great for my schedule. Especially since she has a crock pot recipe every week that I can throw in the pot on my long work day. And I LOVE that the shopping list is already made! She even chooses the week's recipes according to season so you can take advantage of seasonal fruits & veggies. There's free trial menus on their site if you want to check it out.

I think I'm going to renew my subscription, I've gotten lazy with preplanning meals again. I saved a few months of recipes and reused them and I have the Saving Dinner cookbook, so I haven't subscribed since last year. I miss that feeling of relief you get when you know what to fix for dinner every night.

That is the best idea in the world! Thank you so much for posting this!

ORIGINAL: Xebby

I don't really know where else to post this but I really do need to get it out and part of the reason I want to loose weight is because of this.

I made my BF a promise that I would become healthier and loose some weight.  That was about 2 years ago.  Since I have only gained and I can't figure out why.  Now he is upset because not only did I break the promise but I made the problem worse.  He just recently stopped telling me he loves me because he says I lied to him.  I made a promise, something I don't do often to help our relationship and I couldn't do that simple thing.  He says he doesn't want a relationship where I am unhealthy and will die early, a relationship that he has to worry about me becoming diabetic, he want a physically healthy relationship.  He says it's hard to care about me when I don't show that I care about myself.  Our sex life has suffered greatly because of my weight gain.  When I finally ask why he doesn't love me any more he only said "I love you only as a friend."  That hurt me so much to hear him say that.  I know he's incredibly stressed right now and the both of us hardly see each other now as much as we have in months past because of how busy the both of us are.  I am only hoping that once he is done with school and finishes he double major (BioChem/Psychology) we can work on our relationship and I can finally do what I promised and get this extra weight off of me.  When I met him 4 1/2 years ago I was 80 lbs lighter and we had a great relationship, then suddenly I started to gain weight and well... I would say our relationship was great up until the point that he starting bringing up my weight.  I am short as it is and I gain very easily.  I don't want to be heavy but I don't know what to do anymore, I'm loosing the one person I care about because of how unhealthy I've allowed myself to become.  He is not unreasonable but to him the fact that he sees it as a lie makes him angry.  Yes, I did promise to loose weight and it seems like all the problems that come up in our relationship stem around my weight. 

He is extremely healthy, goes to the gym, bikes, keeps a food journal and eats only healthy food.  He can't understand why I can't do it.  Also being the weight that I am I can't keep up with him while hiking and biking, he has to slow down to my level and gets upset at all the breaks we have to take.  I want to become more active but I also feel that perhaps I am holding him back because I just can't keep up to his level, I once didn't have that problem.  He sees my weight as selfish; by being heavy every one around me has to suffer.  In a way to him it's not really how much I weight but how healthy I keep myself and I can honestly say I haven't been doing that great of a job of it but I can't stand how much my relationship has suffered because of my health.

 
Oh gosh Amanda. . .  I'm so sorry to hear this. I have been in this situation, somewhat. My ex-boyfriend and I did the same thing. I had promised to lose the weight and get back to being active. He was also, like your BF, very active and in shape. He had to slow down for me as well. Instead of losing the weight, I gained more. I did try to lose it, or I thought I was trying, but I only ended up putting it back on and then some.
 
I don't know your relationship with your BF so this is why I say I have kind of been in your position. My ex BF and I always had a bumpy relationship. I ended up resenting him for not loving me and accepting me the way that I was, which at that time was 140 lbs. I would do a happy dance right now if I were 140 lbs again. I didn't look bad at all, I just wasn't in the shape that I used to be in. I finally realized, after watching Dr. Phil [], that I would never lose the weight if I was trying to lose it for somebody else. It just wasn't going to happen. I had to want to lose it for myself. In my case, I realized that a big part of the reason I was so attached this jerk was because I felt like I couldn't do any better. I felt like I was lucky to have someone like him be attracted to me and want to be with me and this belief really had an effect on the relationship. It set the tone. I'm pretty sure he felt the same way, that I was lucky to be with him. I am NOT saying this is the same for you, but that's just what it was for me. It took what seemed like forever for me to realize that I DIDN'T deserve this guy, but I deserved much better and I left him.
 
If I were you, I would talk to your BF about this. Tell him that it hurts you and it doesn't help you in your weight loss goals to have someone who seems to be criticizing you and making you feel bad about yourself. You need someone who is encouraging and positive. Someone who is thinking about YOU and YOUR needs instead of him and his own. For example, in the work place, I'm sure that the bosses who are nice, encouraging an supportive and have an open door policy are more well-liked, respected and have employees who work harder for them than a boss who is negative, condescending and criticizing. He shouldn't be punishing you in any way for not keeping your "promise". Your promise should have been to you anyways, not to him.
 
 

Amanda - I can understand what you're feeling and I'm sorry you're going thru this.  If the pressure and distancing from you BF is making you depressed, then it's likely contributing to some of the weight gain.  Personally, if you were fine with how you looked and felt, then it might just be an issue of his expectations vs. reality.  But you're unhappy too and I think ultimately you'll feel a lot better about yourself and the relationship if you accomplish your goal of losing the weight you want.  Being able to share recreational activities you both enjoy is probably a big deal to him, and frankly, it would be to me too.  You don't have a physical disability to prevent that, so it's in your hands (and that's a good thing) to turn it around.  What's that saying "the longest journey begins with the first step?" or something like that [].  You can do this, and you can start today.  You don't need some huge action plan or a mtg with a nutritionist to get started.  You simply need to take the first step.  It can begin with the next meal and can continue with a 15 minute walk afterwards.   Your BF may not believe you at first, but that's okay.  The only person who really needs to believe you can do it, is you []

Oh gosh, that's so tough.  You have to be sure to this for you and not him.  Dont jump in the deep end either, I think taking it slow is the best way to go.  If you restrict your diet too much you may be more likely to over indulge some days.

Every time I talk to him it's always "we already talked about this and you know you broke your promis"  then "how would you feel if someone promised you something and lied about it?"  So I did make that promis and now I have to loose the weight to show him that I am serious about having a relationship with him. He has tried to help me loose weight but I've never taken his suggestion because the way he goes about it makes me feel horrable about myself.
 
He said that until I can keep a promis that he can not trust me.  He is very upset that I lied to him about loosing weight.  He tells me to "just do it", "it's not that hard", "if you cared about me you would not have a problem keeping a promis".  He doesn't have the cravings for food the way I do, he doesn't know what it's like to have my body and my mindset, for me it is hard and he just doesn't understand.
 
I really am alone at this, I have no one to talk to.  My Mom is even worse about critizising me about my weight and I don't really have any friends who can relate.  I have no one, the people who are closest to me can't even beguin to understand.  I am so falling apart right now and even as I'm typing I'm crying my eyes out trying to figure out how to handel everything.  It really makes me hate myself for even being alive and traped in this body I have, I feel so worthless.  I know I need some help but I have no where to turn.  I have tried being strong but for everything I do it only comes back even worse.  I can't stop crying now, but I  don't know what else to do.  I've cryied in front of him several times and he's gotten to a point that he just ignors my crys for help and tells me to stop being such a drama queen.  I don't know how else to work something out other than just let my emotions take over.  I don't even know why I'm posting it here...

I'm really struggling today, LOL!  A chocolate Heath bar crunch cake is here at work!  I just took a little bite.  I felt guilty having any more than that.  Especially, since I told Willow no cookies before I left.  Poor baby, can't be on a diet alone.  []

It sounds to me like your boyfriend is the problem, not you.  Promising to lose weight is a lot different than promising to take the trash out or something.  I don't think he should have asked you to make that promise in the first place.  If he is genuinely concerned about your health, that's one thing.  He should have been supportive and helped you accomplish YOUR goal, not his.  You will never be able to lose the weight if you feel like crap all of the time, and like other people have said, you have to want to do it for yourself.  I don't know the details of your relationship, but it sounds like you need to at least take a break from each other.  That way you can have some time to think about what is important to you, without being judged and criticized by someone you love.  I know it's hard to hear and I hope I didn't offend you. 
 
BTW- it IS hard to lose weight, I know because I am going through the same thing.  I suggest you go out and buy yourself a gift, maybe get a pedicure or something.  Then, go home and have a glass of wine (provided you are 21 of course), take a bubble bath and listen to some inspirational music.  You can always PM me if you need to talk.