(Read this article on Cracked.com... now before you ask "Zach, why?" Read the article. As Americans we DO have some wildlife to worry about protecting our canine companions, but check out what they have to deal with in other countries!
*Note: did my best to cut out the obscenities. They should all be bleeped out.)
Dingoes
are the apex predator of Australia, a place where basically everything
is actively trying to kill everything else. A dingo's diet consists of
whatever it can catch, ranging from insects to large mammals, and as such the species has been blamed for the extinction of several other animal species, such as the Tasmanian tiger, or even the disappearance of the Tasmanian devil from mainland Australia. Unlike dogs, the dingo can rotate their heads 180 degrees in each direction, and can turn their wrist in such a fashion as to work knobs and open your ******* doors. In summary: AHHHHHHH!
kwm00re
Addendum: AIIIIEEEE!!!
Kangaroos, on the other hand, are ridiculous looking marsupials that sometimes star in whacky caper movies with the fat kid from Stand By Me.
Screenshot from the movie Kangaroo Jack not included. Because we love you.
If chased by a pack of dingoes, the kangaroo has an odd defense: It will flee into at least chest-deep water
and wait. If a dingo should follow the kangaroo into the water, the
kangaroo will grab the dog's head with its arms and plunge it under the
water, hit-man style, until it drowns.
But what if there's no water nearby? The kangaroo can't coolly and
dispassionately execute all comers like Jean Reno, then, right?
Wrong.
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Dead wrong.
On land, kangaroos again clutch the dingo about the head with their
adorable little half-arms, but this time they just kick the animal in
the stomach repeatedly until they're disemboweled.
But it doesn't stop at dingoes: To a kangaroo, a dog is a dog is a dead ******* dog. They'll go straight gangland on any domesticated dogs
they perceive as threats as well. In 2009, an Australian man was out
taking his blue heelers for a walk, when one slipped loose and chased a
large gray kangaroo into a shallow creek. The kangaroo did how kangaroos
do: He put that ***** in the water. When the man waded out to save his
pet, the kangaroo kindly obliged him and released the canine. But life
must always be paid for with life: The kangaroo slashed the man's face
repeatedly, and attempted to drown him instead.
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"Beware: Kangaroos will cut your ******* face."
Eventually the kangaroo realized that the water was too shallow to
drown a full-grown man, so it started disemboweling him instead.
Luckily, the report says the man "escaped unharmed" ... or wait -- no,
sorry. This says, "extremely harmed." Extremely harmed. There's a
bunch of underlines here, too: He came away with an eight-inch cut
across his abdomen, serious wounds to his head, back and chest, and a
newfound respect for kangaroos.