Tuesday Chat

 I have lots of work today. I can't wait for next Friday, my birthday. I think I may have to work a little bit though, but I don't know. I think I have decided though, I want to do nothing that day. I just found out also that the never ending pasta bowl is back at Olive Garden, so that looks like a possibility. I'm also looking forward to the possibility of some new work stuff. I just sent the email this morning that I am not renewing one of my contracts. That felt so good. I didn't say why (because there is no personal development available for me there, and we aren't working on anything that is going to help that kid live on his own, or closer to it, hold a job, or have things to do with his free time). So, that one is out. I have the possibility of an internship, it's not paid, but it has the opportunity to develop the skills I need to move up. It's what I need right now, and I'm glad if this can be something mutually beneficial to myself and the person offering it. I indicated that I might not be unhappy to get rid of another client. I should be picking up something new and getting rid of something else, and there is another I might get rid of, depending on how my interview goes on Thursday. So, all in all, things seem pretty good. for me today.

In other good news, if you saw my arts and crafts, I will know what to do with the rest of my tie dye stuff on Thursday!

sharismom

Then he asked how I knew about Jo's passing, made some other small talk, then before we hung up (maybe a five minute conversation), he asked if he could call me again.  Um...I guess so (but why?).  In the 4 years I lived in the town and went to church, I really said nothing more than hello to him; I knew Jo and two of her daughters.  Needless to say, I'm a little freaked out, but trying to chalk it up to his grief and nothing more.

You knew her and you know his kids -- he probably feels guilty that he "disconnected" somewhat while she was so ill and he's trying to recapture "happier days" or someone that knew the essence of Jo Ellen ... not just "Poor Jo who has CANCER".  It's pretty typical Tina -- but DO watch yourself that he doesn't depend on you or try to call you 'regularly'.  It's a normal part of grief, but it can feel really weird.  When you have someone you love who dies slowly and 'badly' like that there's a guilt for feeling released from the prison they call 'cancer'.  You might want to look up and see if there is a grief hotline or cancer support group in your area to *give him* the number. 

A week from tomorrow David and I leave to go visit my folks for a week -- and I am NOT ready.  I have GOT to get my act in gear or I won't be!!

  Bugsy good gracious boy go elsewhere

JackieG

Ok, all the grouches, get over it.  All the cheery people, carry on.   Was that helpful?

Paige, good vibes for Gracie.

Tina, I have no advice for you about the widower except be kind but firm.

Thanks Jackie you made that easy

The never ending heat and humidity remains - had a chuckle this morning while out walking and met a neighbor - we said we'd had three Augusts this year.  

This week is fairly slow which means I have to find more to do - this is the part of working for yourself I hate.  I would love to walk into and office and have a clear picture of the tasks ahead.  Well for a month then I'd be ready to go back to this LOL

  Gross he just farted again.  I'm beginning to think cicada's don't agree with him

 Listening to my diaper cat be mad in the bathroom ( she starts making alot of noise!), she can't come out yet, her back side is still unhappy. my poor kitty, too bad they don't make cat diaper cream!

Zoe bug chewed through her harness last night! smacking myself for not taking it off when I put her in the run with bella. So no fun jogging or anythign harness related today. I'm hoping I can just sew it back together.

 My 'i get moody when I drink' BF did just that, he was fine one minute, then he came back i the house, I asked if he was gonna watch the rest of  a movie with me, he said no. I asked if he was mad, he said no, but you could def tell something was going on!! So I though 'ooooookkeeee whatever' and went to bed early. He slept on the couch til bout 6:30 this morning.  HOping he isn't all grumpy this morning. but I honestly don't care! LMAO I'm having a good day so far & I'm pretty determined to keep it that way.  

It was funny because we were having a conversation before this about his friend who is a HUGE alcoholic & probably the most needy & dependent person I've ever met in my life!  and my BF brought up how he acts while trashed, and I had to 'correct' him on a few points. So maybe he was dwelling on some of that?? LOL Nah, I doubt it lol!!

 anywho, everyone have a good day!!!

Lily is at the school helping out...glad she's not here complaining of boredom! Elias is o.d.ing on Wii.

I had an odd dream last night...I know what it means but I dunno that I agree with my subconcious. I dreamt that we all (myself kids n dh) were on a roadtrip and we stopped to get gas and these two dodgy looking dudes were asking my dh for a ride. I was like NO F'ING WAY!! and he said "I have to, they're clients....I need to do my job"...and I put my foot down and said then WE (meaning kids and me) would get out right now and stay at this gas station. AND HE LEFT US!!

CRAY-ZAY!! I remember in the dream texting him like crazy telling him how much I hated that he did this, that I was going to divorce him and he wouldn't see us again...and those guys were going to kill him, etc. VERY weird. I woke with a feeling of dread and mostly confused because my hubs just isn't like that.

Things are insane at his job and he's been working Saturdays, and later at night, really begrudgingly too...he hates it and it's stressing him out because he thinks he is bad for doing that. Clients have been yelling at him because he has had to tell them the salad days are over and it's time to pay the piper (many have just been paying interest on their loans but now it's time to pay principle and no more loans to you). He HATES being the bad guy because he hates confrontation...been really tough on him.

I have been being supportive but I wonder if part of me isn't resentful and that's why I dreamed what I did. Almost has to be that. Aren't I a selfish byouknowhat???

akyramoto82

Listening to my diaper cat be mad in the bathroom ( she starts making alot of noise!), she can't come out yet, her back side is still unhappy. my poor kitty, too bad they don't make cat diaper cream!

A & D ointment works well on cats. I used it on the tailess kitten I had, Sach....cleared his monkey butt up really well. Don't wet it too much either...that exacerbates the problem. If it is really bad you can also use a touch of cortisone cream. That helps a lot but also thins the skin so it will tear more easily so be careful.

I am not sure what's up with you kitty but that's my experience with kitties with sore bums LOL!

Good vibes for Gracie and all the grumps this morning!

Karen, I totally hear you - for the last week I've been doing more stuff to get my business up and running, but there's not a whole lot I can do until I get my logo worked out and my LLC paperwork approved.  So weird to not have a zillion things on my plate like I did when I was working for someone else!

Today I have a 3 hour small business development class at the local community college's small business center - they have a 5 week series for $25 (15 hours!) and then a 3 week grant writing series for $15, so I figured I'd take them up on it and hopefully get some networking in while I'm learning.

 At 6pm I have the volunteer orientation I need before I can start volunteering at the local animal shelter - looking forward to getting back into that field but on my terms this time.

Yesterday ended with MIL drama.  DH and I got "housewarming presents" from her that are absolutely hideous but are designed to be hung on the wall - one was a tin print that said "I love all creatures...with potatoes and gravy" . 

DH decided something needed to be done so that she doesn't keep spending her money on stuff that we then need to either hide away or give away and worry about hurting her feelings by not hanging them.  He and I discussed it and knew that it was going to be a touchy convo but that it was best to do it now rather than waiting until she visited and saw that we weren't using them. 

Unfortunately the convo did not go well at all - he tried to be subtle about it (thanks, but they don't really go with our decor...) but she didn't get it and he had to basically come out and say that we really don't like the hangings and could she please refrain from giving us stuff like that. [:\]  She got really upset and claimed she would have rather had us just hide the fact we didn't like the stuff which sucks because DH knows his mom and knows that she would be offended when she saw we weren't using them. 

Now I feel like a bad DIL because I'm sure she thinks it's mostly me, when it was really a mutual issue with DH and I.    DH feels bad because these gifts really underscored how little his mom knows who he is and has now decided he doesn't want to get gifts from any one EVER, even me, because "it's too much hassle".  I find it soooo sad that holidays and events that should be fun for him have been totally ruined by his family's issues about gift giving. Boo.

And of course after that whole thing DH tells me that his mom asked him if I was pregnant (I've posted a few baby related things on facebook for friends of mine who are pregnant, but have said twice in the last week that babies are not on the near horizon) and when he said no, she said "well maybe she just hasn't told you yet" or something to that effect. DH just decided at that point to tell her that no, I have an IUD and thus it would be near impossible for that to be the case for the next 4 years or so.  Sigh - didn't really want my MIL to know my child planning methods, but if it gets her to shut up about babies...

rwbeagles

Things are insane at his job and he's been working Saturdays, and later at night, really begrudgingly too...he hates it and it's stressing him out because he thinks he is bad for doing that.

rwbeagles

He HATES being the bad guy because he hates confrontation...been really tough on him.

rwbeagles

I was like NO F'ING WAY!! and he said "I have to, they're clients....I need to do my job"

  I don't know if you're resentful - or if it's really an accurate depiction that you feel your family is threatened (figuratively vs physically) by the stress of his job.

 Tina, I'm sorry I didn't respond earlier (mind's kind of a jumble of stressors today).  Anyway, I sort of took it the way that Callie took it.  Just like we come here to talk about our animal friends who have passed away, I took it that maybe this guy wanted to reminisc with someone who knew Jo Ellen before the illness - could think of her in the positive experiences, replay those old memories that give us laughter or support to move on thinking of their life before cancer was ever the dominant theme.  Maybe it helps him to recall those experiences, funny stories, etc - and maybe that's why he wants to call.  Just be clear you have a "very special friend" (and he never needs to know if that's a real thing or not) and move forward if you want to.  Only you can set your boundaries.  good luck

Yeah, I mentioned Gracie not stretching to get off the couch as usual.  It happened twice in about 4 days, then a spurt of normalness, but I watched her stretch the other day and heard a crack (like when you pop a joint), and she's just not doing her fully extended stretches like she's known for.  Something is up.  I asked my sister if I could float the rent for a month (in case this turns out to be several hundred dollars...) and she said yes, for a month.  Phew. 

Thx for the good thoughts for her.

 It's my day off. The puppy did not get the memo about sleeping past 6. She has started barking if she sees one of the other dogs, and Elf had jumped off the bed. So, took the puppy out, praised her for going and popped her back in the crate.  Then, bark, bark. She was hungry I didn't want to go all the way to the kitchen (I was going to be getting up to run the lad to work in half and hour or so anyway) so I gave her the little bit of leftover kibble from her dinner last night. She ate that, but then promptly let me know that those tiny kibbles were not enough, thankyoumuch.   Ahh, puppies.

We really have to work on some sort of attention span..she has no attention span to stay focused on appropriate chew items. Kibble in a Kong held her attention for a few minutes, but everything else she just wanders off. She's like a little ninja..last night she chewed through the printer's usb cord while sitting at my feet!  We do the redirect to an appropriate object, but apparently our appropriate objects are not fun enough Aesop was older than she is when we got him, so I'm hoping she grows a bit of focusing in a few weeks ...but then I think back to when we picked up Aesop and their breeder called the smooth pups in the litter the little velociraptors and commented on how they'd worked in a group to disconnect the washing machine hose

That aside, she's a splendid puppy 

 grab01 - you mean puppies CAN have an attention span?! Ari didn't develop hers until she was about a 1 1/2 years old Thankfully, she never had an interest in wires or furniture, unfortunately she a keen interest in human flesh. It's why puppies are cute...it's all about survival. 

I think tonight is a Ben & Jerry's kinda night. Their new (I think, or at least new to me) Mud Pie ice cream is going to be the complete and utter undoing of my weight loss progress. 

rwbeagles

akyramoto82

Listening to my diaper cat be mad in the bathroom ( she starts making alot of noise!), she can't come out yet, her back side is still unhappy. my poor kitty, too bad they don't make cat diaper cream!

A & D ointment works well on cats. I used it on the tailess kitten I had, Sach....cleared his monkey butt up really well. Don't wet it too much either...that exacerbates the problem. If it is really bad you can also use a touch of cortisone cream. That helps a lot but also thins the skin so it will tear more easily so be careful.

I am not sure what's up with you kitty but that's my experience with kitties with sore bums LOL!

 

thanks for the suggestion - this is cricket monster who was hit by a car in May, tail amp, and no control over bowel & urinary functions, hence the diapering so she can hang out around the house. So ya her poor bum has just been diapered too much! so I'm giving her a break - which she hates!! she hates being shut in the bathroom. currently trying to build her an outdoor pen to hang out in, so it least she can not be locked inside and and she can leak all over 'outside'! LOL I was just worried if I put something on there, she'll lick it off.

Callie & Paige, I truly hope you both are right.  There were a couple of other things he said to me that I don't want to post that sent the red flag up.  I will be looking up grief support numbers to share with him just in case he didn't realize that hospice offers those services to family members after the death.

Goose, you are lucky that you are such a cute puppy!

Erin, good luck with your MIL.  Families are never easy.

Gina, your dream starts out sounding like a book I just read called "The Cold Kiss".  It was about a young couple giving a ride to a guy they met in a diner.  The g/f was the softie, b/f gave in, then murder and mayhem ensued. 

 Ah mornings.. Fun... I feel no sympathy for Alex right now... He drank way to much of homemade brew last night and has been sick since 8 this morning.. I think it's karma for picking a fight with me last night.

I found out yesterday that I can get a copy of Culture Clash through my local bookstore! So I ordered it. LOL Thankfully I can do lay away with them so it's not that big of a deal. 

I need about 6 more cups of coffee before I make it out the door in a couple hours.. Didn't sleep well since I had this stupid sleep machine hooked up to my finger.  And I get to do it again tonight.. Yippee...

sharismom

There were a couple of other things he said to me that I don't want to post that sent the red flag up. 

eekers - trust the red flags! Good for you for directing him to support services. 

Today has been totally jacked up - and it's only 10am.  Weird.

 2 pages of chat already! I still need some coffee.