Posted : 12/11/2009 9:45:27 AM
Elias was dx with ADHD just a couple months ago. He is in the process of being screened in school...but the medical exemption for that is already a done deal...and he is getting help from an OT and diagnostician already as they work up a full plan for the year.
First off, I would let him know about the testing personally. It can be a GREAT comfort to know WHY you are not able to master something. I mean right now, he probably KNOWS he is struggling but doesn't know WHY...might be very frustrated and feel hopeless even. I understand about his potential fears of classmates finding out but I really...would not be comfortable lying to my child...and it would be lying, the whole class is NOT being tested...
He is old enough to know what a learning disability is and to know, with your support...that it is no one's fault...it is NOT a negative, that IF something comes up there ARE SO MANY THINGS that can help...seriously They have MYRIAD strategies, even tools and special PAPER for kids that just can open doors that have been shut tight.
I personally would sit down and validate his feelings..."I know you do your best and I am proud of that...sometimes in life there are things that stand in the way of our potential and if we need help getting to and past, those things, we should ask for that help"...boys will be men someday and we ALL know what it is like to deal with men who cannot or WILL NOT seek aid because they see it as a sign of weakness. That has to start somewhere...and IMO it starts when they are boys, and we hide things from them or try to do things for them without letting them in on it.
I don't mean to be harsh at ALL, but my 6 year old boy is on an ADHD drug and he KNOWS it...he knows why he does the testing they do in school, and he knows that EVERYONE just wants him to be able to have a fun less stressful, more educational experience in school. His stress level has simply dropped off the scale since we started to ACT and not just speculate.
Learning disabilities are in many cases, medical conditions...like ADHD and it has to do with the brain or how info gets processed...you would not want your own Mom to keep things from you on a medical issue right? Allow him to know, and to feel in CONTROL of what is happening with him...he is NOT a "special ed case" no...but he is special...special to you and his family, and you ALL need to support one another thruout.
The school is even able to BE, because of your own tax dollars. Make sure THEY get reminded of that...and do not ask...DEMAND that your concerns be addressed and never be afraid to go over a teacher or Principals head to get the assistance you require.
Good luck with this and do PM me if you have questions or even just to tell me to butt out LOL. This is all fresh with me and honestly there is SO MUCH that can be done to help nowadays...once you know what direction to head in!
eta: if you are in a financial place to be able to do it...many hospital mental health facilities do their own, LD testing...your insurance may even cover all or part of the cost. We went that route with Elias and it helped us get an unbiased opinion about his issues...priceless IMO. Always remember the school will want to do what costs them the LEAST in both manpower and responsibility...having something from an accredited and schooled individual to show them can realllllly help them get off their kiesters and ACT.