Squirrels In Her Knickers

OMG thanks for the laughs guys......... I laughed so hard I started snorting and crying. Oh my sides ache!
 
Riding my motorcycle once going over a bridge, a bee beamed me in the head and landed inside my shirt.  Being stung, I pulled over on the bridge and pulled my shirt off in my panic not realizing ummm I was braless this day. To make matters worse, there was a prisoner cleaning crew at the foot of the bridge who enjoyed the show. Red faced I got the offener out of my shirt and quickly put the shirt back on, only to realize when I reached my destination I had it inside out.
 
I witnessed a cop doing a one footed jig in the middle of the highway dancing around in a circle because a spider crawled up his uniformed pants. NOW that was a sight to behold. I laughed so hard.

HolyMoly forpaws...*note to self* do ride braless.  I can relate, I have been beaned in the head by bugs that felt like 747's hitting me.  It's hard not to panic.  One guy on one ride had a yellow jacket land in his ear and bite the crap out of his inner ear, he almost laid it down on that one.  To this day we call him 'Stinger'.
I was out doing more yardwork again today and boy was I jumpy, a great big hoppitycreepycrawly the size of a sesame seed nearly gave me a seizure.  I decided to come inside and take a break.  Jules

Hence my other alias...... Buzzy! [sm=rofl.gif]
 
I know, I know... those bugs hurt like H E double Hockey sticks not to mention the goose egg they can leave behind.
 
 

And I thought catching a bee in my mouth as I chased down the school bus hollering "Waaaaait" was bad!
You guys are too funny!!

OMfrickinG--I am hyperventilating and laughing at the same time with tears in my eyes!!! It's too bad somebody didn't have a video camera around--you surely would have won first prize on America's Funniest Home Videos!

I have seen regular spiders bigger than that--we grow 'em big out here in the Pacific NW.  However, to have it crawl up your pant leg would make nearly evryone do the "One Legged Chicken Dance"!!!

Go back in the house, pur yourself a glass of iced tea (or soemthign stronger) and just relax.  You deserve it after a morning like this!!!

ORIGINAL: pofi_pasquale

Thanks, Jules. Thankfully for me, my strip tease was performed in the hall away from any windows and I really had very little reaction to the stings. They felt just like tiny little pricks - more annoying than painful.

It was a yellow jacket, not a bee, because a bee can only sting once, while a yellow jacket or any other wasp can sting numerous times. Just for everyone's enlightenment and in the interest of biological accuracy. [] Glad you are OKAY!!!!

Okay....so here's my story....

1. I had a motorcycle boyfriend in highschool. He had a friend named Burn and they would go riding every weekend. One weekend Burn wasn't around and I asked why. "Wal," my boyfriend said, "He was ridin' a coupla days ago and an' gotta bee inside his helmet, an' it was flyin' around in circles in front of his eyes an' I *guess* it made it hard for him to see where he was goin'."

2. I once put on a clean pair of underpants and a Tshirt and sat down to work at the computer. Something suddenly PINCHED me right in the WOO HOO and I jumped up and grabbed my crotch and heard a CRUNCH! Whipping off my panties I saw I'd squished a small spider right you know where!

3. While living in New Mexico I was cleaning house. I picked up a newspaper off the floor, felt something rubbery between my fingers, looked down and it was a black widow! I flung it on the floor and immediately trompled it flat. Then then adrenaline caught up with me and I had to sit down and heart pound and SHAKE for a while.

Thing is, I've been bit twice in my sleep by black widows. They aren't that horribly poisonous except to small people and animals, and people who are already sick. But there isn't anything like actually having one squirming between your fingers! And I'll never forget how it felt so rubbery! You wouldn't expect that, would you?

omg jeano you had me rollin, I can picture that.  My hair is long and I shed lots of single hairs. Once I was plucking a stray hair off of my arm and I'm suddenly staring at a Daddy Long Legs that I'm holding by one wiggly leg. (It wasn't a hair afterall) Just hold your hand in front of your face  palm to nose and move all your fingers and you get the idea.  Well I panicked and flicked it away but I couldn't find where it landed.  I didn't realize I had looked everywhere but ONE place.  (A realllllly important place).  This was on a Saturday afternoon.  I had gone with my S.O. to a party that night and imbibed a bit.  He drove me home, I stumble into my house, manage to avoid waking anyone up, get stripped down to a T-shirt and skivvies and happily crawl into bed.  I fell asleep right away (no wonder).  Sweet, dreamless slumber.  I wake up in the morning to discover that what I thought was a mole on my cheek had sprouted  hairs  (??!!??)   Nope!  I squashed the Daddy Long Legs in my sleep and it was moooshed onto my cheek and had been there for hours.....EEeeeeWWwwwiieeeee!!!!   Too bad my blow dryer couldn't have doubled as a defibrilator because my chest clinched and squeezed and I thought I don't wanna die of a heart attack at least until I get this uckie bug offa me!!  I can laugh at it all now, but back then just thinking about it was enough to give me the urge to shower.  [sm=blush.gif]  Jules