calliecritturs
Posted : 2/21/2011 10:00:16 PM
You are probably going to have to step back and let your *wife* be the primary caregiver. Let her feed this dog (often one kibble at time works wonders).
There may also be personality differences -- how do *you* reinforce this dog? Are you effusive or quiet? She'd do well to mimic you a bit.
Essentially you are the "key" -- if you're there most everything is ok. But your wife needs to replace you in that for a while.
Suggestion: when you aren't there, have your wife lie down on the floor next to the dog. That's a strategic "I'm no threat to you pose particularly if she's on her back. But just spending time talking to this dog and quietly reinforcing "I"m ok too".
But the other thing is to do some obedience with this dog. Honestly it can be marvelous because it can literally help them come out of their shelll -- "Wow, you mean I can do this RIGHT? You LIKE this??"
IN other words, don't let her get away with just avoiding everyone.
Another really nice trick is to sit on a chair close to where the dog is. Have your wife hold a treat in each hand. Then simply call the dog's name. The first flicker of the eyes towards your wife -- pop the treat in her mouth. You can vary this game -- calling her name from across the room and TOSSING a treat to her (this isn't "come" -- this is just a reward for giving eye contact). But essentially let this dog think that her name on your wife's lips is THE BEST thing ever.