Our 4 year old Jack Russlle/Rat terrier mix Milo crossed the rainbow bridge last Wednesday 3/30, at age of 4.... We rescued him from the local shelter and we had him only for 10 months.. He was dignossed AIHA back in January, he had been fighting over this nasty desies for almost 3 months... He just had spleen removal and stone removal from stomach on 3/24 and he was doing so well after he came back home that weekend, 3/26. Everybody thought he would recover perfectly. He was doing so well, he ate good, barked and acted like a little puppy. Nobody thought he would be gone so quickly and unexpectly.
I often wonder if I did something wrong... I shouldn't let him go up and down steps or let him eat this and that.... I often wonder if my decision of surgey was the right decision.... No matter how much I wonder how I have done.... he won't be coming back... he is gone forever... physically anyway....
I miss him so much and I am having hard time to fall asleep at night. I am so used to have him and snuggle together till I fell asleep..... I am sure I get enough hour of sleep but I feel like I haven't slept at all. I feel no motivation for anything. We had another dog before Milo but we were prepared for his death because of his age and his illness -cancer. I wasn't ready for Milo at all....maybe that's why his death hit me so hard....
I am looking for another dog to rescue or adopt... I can not live like this any longer... it's been only 4 days but my house looks like bumb dropped but still i don't feel any motivation.... his kennel is still here and his dishes are here... dogs foods... treats... toys.... every corner of house reminds of him... and I can not stop thinking of him. Not many people understands how I feel... I know he was a dog... family pet... but he was a part of my family.... to me anyway..... I feel like I lost my baby. My husband and kids already moved on... but I am stuck here and still crying about his sudden death.... I might be able to move on when his ash comes back to me....
Thank you for listening....
Meg