My Gadsby was 14.5 years old, he died in my arms on Saturday around 1:00 p.m. He lived simply to please and love me all those years. As I never had children, my husband and I treated him like a human child, so he didn't really know he was a dog. He had been sick for the last two, and hung on solely for me. He knew how hard it would be for me to live or want to go on without him. We spent nearly every day of his life together, even when I worked, he was there in the office in the chair. He was a soulful and spiritual 18 lb Shih-Tzu, with a very human like quality and spirit about him. I do believe he was really a gift from God all these years. He knew what I was thinking, he knew what I was feeling, he knew how to ease the pain of human suffering. And he did heal a lot of wounds and filled my heart with love and joy I had never experienced before in my life. Even when he was sick, or when he had surgery on his corneas he would always lick my hand and comfort me in his pain..he put me before his own needs. The veteranarian told me that he was staying alive for me, as he had numerous serious health issues and would not give up until I was ready to let him go, which I did on this last Saturday. The pain and grief is nearly as bad as when I lost my mother when I was a 15 year old girl, and quite honestly, it feels very similar. I believe he had a human spirit inside a canine's body. No one will ever convince me otherwise, as little Gadsby never was interested in playing with other dogs, never had any interest in playing with kids, or any interest in other people other than my husband and I. He simply came into this world to be my companion, my friend, my little one, and give me all his love.
The pain and anguish is at times unbearable as we were lifetime best friends for each other and now I am alone. I smell his little outfits he wore and have a piece of his tail and soon his cremated remains will be with me later in the week, but at times I have wished to just go be with him, as this world seems so cold and indifferent at times, and he made life worth living. Thanks for letting me share my little story, I condensed 14.5 years into one paragraph, which is rather difficult, but the essence of the story pervades and the truth has been written in words.