Male v.s. Female

BlackLabbie

Liesje

Make sure the breeder is aware of Kayla's traits.  Honestly, to me reputable breeders to the picking.  Now I am not familiar with Poms, but with GSDs, the breeders will do the picking unless you already have a relationship with that person and know the dogs well enough to pick. 

Yes, when we got our first Lab from a very reputable breeder (now owns the #2 Pointer in the world), she picked our first Lab from the litter for us, we didn't, and we didn't have any other dogs. The Lab she picked for us fit beautifully in with our family.

Yup, my GSD was picked for me as well.  I wanted a large, heavy boned, dark male shepherd.  I got a tiny, skinny, light female shepherd! However, she is EXACTLY what I was looking for and I am thrilled.  The breeders are the ones who have raised, trained, and titled their dogs.  They see beyond colors, sizes, and patterns.  Of course we all have an idea of what we want as far as looks, but that should not be the top priority.  Either go with the dog the breeder suggest, or wait until there is a matching dog that does look like what you want.

 IMHO,female dogs, at least mine can be a bitch. Like Kayla, she is top dog and will not share that position with any other dog, especially a female. My vote is for a male who doesn't mind being second.

corgipower

What sort of dominant behaviors does she display? When you say "she knows she's the queen", I suspect that it is because you are elevating her status in you spoiling of her. Not necessarily a bad thing, as long as there is no aggression, and as long as it's on your terms.

Dominant Behaviors:

• Desire to "run" things. Wants to have everything her way.
• Desire to push through doors (in and out) before me.
• Desire to jump and reach for food/treats before I put it down.
• Walks on me, stands on me, paws at me.
• Tries to "stand tall" verses back down.
• Enters areas or gets on furniture before permission. Feels the home is HER domain.
• Keeps eye contact at all times (but I enjoy this and encouraged it)
• Reluctant to listen to comands at time (refusing or slow compliance)
• Hard during play
• Growling and barking at other dogs during play
• Shoves toys in my face while I am on the phone or on the computer trying to break my attention
• "heards" or shoves dogs out of the way when they are walking or moving past (during play)
• Gets extremely playful and cute instead of obeying when told to do things.

Most of these traits have been or can be corrected. She is by no means agressive or out of control. But this is her personality 100%

To respect the balance of my home I want a more submissive dog who can understand they are SECOND in comand (but of course not second in my heart). Not letting Kayla continue to be the boss could be the key to promoting fights.

I disagree with much of the "article" about the difference between male and female dogs. I think that if there are major differences between the sexes, that they will be breed-specific.

For example, when I started looking for a GSP I wanted a female. I already had 3 sons and a husband, so why not get a girl dog? LOL. The breeders I spoke with said that if I wanted to do performance events then I should go with a male. One of them said "there is a reason why they are called bitches." LOL.

Talk to the breeder and see what they have to say because they will know the tendencies in their lines the best. 

PS One common difference the article left out is size. Generally the female of a breed is smaller than a male---of course with Poms there isn't as much difference as there could be with a much larger dog!

Good luck with your puppy quest :)

Liesje

The breeders are the ones who have raised, trained, and titled their dogs.  They see beyond colors, sizes, and patterns.  Of course we all have an idea of what we want as far as looks, but that should not be the top priority.  Either go with the dog the breeder suggest, or wait until there is a matching dog that does look like what you want.

This is deff what I struggle with right now. I know what color I want what size I want... But you are totally right that all these things shouldn't be my top priority.

This is what I would say is my priority list:

1. Less Dominant/More Submissive natured pup
2. Less Vocal
3. Affectionate
4. Size
5. Colors/Patterns
6. Gender

If keeping Kayla top dog is a priority, get a male pup. 

It was important for us to add a dog that would defer to Sasha but not be a doormat, so we chose a confident but not pushy male pup from parents who were very good with other dogs.  I have always liked red Ridgebacks with black masks and squarer faces, and here my little boy is BLONDE, no mask, and a delicate face. But his beauty has grown on me and he is the perfect little brat (er, I mean energetic puppy) for our family.

Dog_ma

If keeping Kayla top dog is a priority, get a male pup. 

I would agree with a male pup if you want kayla to be in charge. In my experience the males are more likely to take things in stride and let the female win the power struggle.

As far as the behaviors (barking, humping) you are worried about, if you are starting from a pup you can train them not to do these things. I have an intact male and we have never had a problem with marking, humping or anything else. Those behaviors are not acceptable to me and my dog learned that from the start.

Liesje

I actually don't really agree with many of that article's reasons.  That's WAY over simplified.  Yes, gender matters, but it totally depends on the breed of dog, the purpose for the dog, the dog's lines, and the temperament of the current dog. 

I completely agree.

Really if you want to know the temperments of that particular line, there's no better way than to get referrals from the breeder of people he/she's sold puppies to.  Call them up and ask them about their dogs.  Most people are more than happy to talk about their dogs-even with a complete stranger.  If your breeder absolutely refuses to give you referrals, then don't buy from him/her.   In a perfect world I would want 6 referrals-3 with males and 3 with females.  The issues I would look for are trainability, health, temperment, and anything else that is particular for that breed.  (high prey drive, low prey drive, one person dog, housetraining issues....etc.)

Just got off the phone with my BF and tried to explain to him about everything you are all saying. (he really really really wants a female)

He starts giving me this speach about "sales men" and how they try to convince you something is right for you just because they can't sell it. I started laughing I'm like hun this is the DOG world and this lady is the best breeder in the state. lol geez he sounded like I was buying a car.

Here is his deal (because it's his dog too so we will be picking the pup TOGETHER) he loves American Eskimos but like small dogs. So he wanted an all white Pomeranian female. I told him that's hard to get and white is also more difficult to maintain (tear staining, etc). Then he said well then a creme or lighter color. (as you can see he's all about the look of the dog and Kayla is his first dog so girl = good to him and our neighbors male is just obnoxious so male = bad to him)

I tried to tell him lets say we get a female and they fight and its a nightmare. And he was like yeah idk your right but they are a puppy and we can teach them not to...

ahhhh he's frustraiting haha. by the time the puppies are born I hope I can convince him to pick a dog based on personality not looks & gender. which he will! he just needs to MEET the dogs and he'll be like "ow i want this one..."

Xerxes

Really if you want to know the temperments of that particular line, there's no better way than to get referrals from the breeder of people he/she's sold puppies to.  Call them up and ask them about their dogs.  Most people are more than happy to talk about their dogs-even with a complete stranger.  If your breeder absolutely refuses to give you referrals, then don't buy from him/her.   In a perfect world I would want 6 referrals-3 with males and 3 with females.  The issues I would look for are trainability, health, temperment, and anything else that is particular for that breed.  (high prey drive, low prey drive, one person dog, housetraining issues....etc.)

Ow that's awesome advice! I never even thought about this! Thank you

SalemsMom

Dog_ma

If keeping Kayla top dog is a priority, get a male pup. 

I would agree with a male pup if you want kayla to be in charge. In my experience the males are more likely to take things in stride and let the female win the power struggle.

As far as the behaviors (barking, humping) you are worried about, if you are starting from a pup you can train them not to do these things. I have an intact male and we have never had a problem with marking, humping or anything else. Those behaviors are not acceptable to me and my dog learned that from the start.

This makes sense to me... I could always have him neutered early and I'm going to begin training ASAP... I do have faith no matter what gender... I just have to convince my BF now...

Dog_ma

It was important for us to add a dog that would defer to Sasha but not be a doormat, so we chose a confident but not pushy male pup from parents who were very good with other dogs.  I have always liked red Ridgebacks with black masks and squarer faces, and here my little boy is BLONDE, no mask, and a delicate face. But his beauty has grown on me and he is the perfect little brat (er, I mean energetic puppy) for our family.

EXACTLY!

Thank you so much everyone... the more opinions the better. I'm going to compile all of your opinions together and explain it to my BF

Jewlieee

4. Yes, it's a fact, a female dog can hold her urine longer than a male dog and some can wait as long as ten to twelve hours if necessary. In a household where no one is home during the day, this is important information in deciding whether to get a female or a male.

that is so the opposite of my experience!

Jewlieee

4. I disagree with this as well. I know many male dogs with bladders of steel.

Bugsy has been like that since we got him.  He was about 12-14 wks old and could go through the night from 10 pm to 6 am with NO issue.  we wold take him out and he would look at us like but I don't need to go

Jewlieee

4. Yes, it's a fact, a female dog can hold her urine longer than a male dog and some can wait as long as ten to twelve hours if necessary. In a household where no one is home during the day, this is important information in deciding whether to get a female or a male.

That's the opposite, in my own experience. My male was waaay easier to housebreak, compared to my female, too. He can also hold it was longer, if need be.