Babies...

Cathy, the only military hospital I have any experience with is Travis, and it was amazing.  Even the food was good - or maybe it just seemed that way after being on the *surgical liquid* for 3 days. [] Someone even came to check to see if the food that was supposed to be served hot was hot, and the cold food was sufficiently cold. And that was in 1977 - the old hospital.  I haven't seen the new one yet.

Joyce

Amy, breastfeeding doesn't cause "droops" - weight gain does.  A lot of women who breastfed don't droop, and a lot who didn't, do. [] Don't they have some new creams for stretch marks now?  Stuff that they didn't have way back when?

Joyce

Joyce - '77 is when we arrived at Travis and spent 5 years there before leaving for Germany.  It was a great place to be stationed and I'm so glad your experience was positive.
 
Amy - I felt just like you when I was in my 20s and early 30s.  I was so majorly afraid of the changes a baby would bring...and what if we regretted it?  While I can't say I have major regrets about not having children, if I had it to do over again, I'd definitely go for it.  I see the joy (and sometimes pain) that they can bring and how they force you to grow up and become less self-absorbed.  I think the positives really outweigh the negatives and I believe that the minute you hold that baby for the first time, all the worries about stuff like droopy breasts, stretch marks, etc., go right out the window.  The coworker who just had the twins is in her late 30s and was pretty nervous about the whole thing, but she cried tears of joy for about a week after the boys were born and hasn't quit gushing yet [].

 

Don't they have some new creams for stretch marks now?

 
I think all that stuff, even the new, wonderful, miracle creams are a lot of false advertising.
 
As for the overall changes your body goes through, it's all about perception and acceptance. 

You are so right, Tina.  It's not like stretch marks have to be exposed to everyone - they're pretty easy to keep covered up if you choose to.  I guess we should be glad that we don't get them on our faces. [][]


Joyce

The faster and more weight you gain, the more stretch marks you get. I have had two kids, and I do have stretch marks on my sides. They are noticable if you look close, but I'm still able to wear a swim suit and not be too embarassed.
 
How well off are you? Meaning, are you able to pay for the expensive insurance? Or can you apply for some sort of low income insurance?
 
Waiting a year sounds like BS to me. If you're thinking about having a baby, you should find a company that will cover you now. And let me tell you... before I got pregnant... I drank once or twice a week after the kids were put in bed. As long as you set a bed time for your little one at a young age, you can have 2 to 3 hours of adult time after they are put to sleep. Grandmas and grandpas are also handy when you want a night out.
 

Im okay with money at times... not okay at times.  I started investing in real estate at 19 because I wanted to retire early.  You are always "sitting" on your money... paying for these houses.  So basically Im broke a lot of the time... but Im sitting on a whole bunch of money.  I have made mistakes that I wont make again.  When you sell a house and have $50,000 you MUST reinvest.... we got a little crazy after the second sale and I have nothing to show for that money... dont have a clue where it went.  We have two houses now... this one we are living in with my parents was very risky as to whether we could afford it but we knew in a few years it would be very worth it.  It was and Katrina almost doubled it.  I get all excited to think of it... but then I know it should not be used yet... just placed into a few more houses when we sell.  So I really dont know when I will be cozy enough with it all to take a bunch of it and just invest the rest but of course thats the end result.
 
I think I have their future taken care of or will by then, but now... its a little rough although not too bad.  I did call just now and got a Humana quote.  They are the only company that doesnt make you wait 9mos to a year... their wait is 90 days... $500 maternity deductible and $400/mo.  Thats still a $2,500 major medical deductible on top... but that likely wont be used. 
 
So if I switch companies now I can get pregnant in 3 months.[8|]
 
I will lather myself up with all the cream I can find and pray it will go easy on my body... something you spend soooooooooo much time dieting and working on its just crazy to do something so detrimental to it, lol... Im mostly kidding here.
 
 

Good for you Amy.  You sound like you have a really good head for investing and to have started so young, is awesome.  I wish I'd started earlier.  Checking into insurance is another smart thing and the Humana plan sounds reasonable.  Three months is no time at all (barely enough time to panic and get cold feet []).  If you're already taking care of yourself and exercising, you might be pleasantly surprised at how little your body changes after having a baby.  My SIL looked as gorgeous (model-type) shortly after having her son as she did before getting pregnant.

Thank you! 
 
I will need you guys to guide me through this at times, I really will.  I am thinking when the time comes Im going to panic and not to be graphic but suddenly tell him to STOP! lol Dont do it in there! Wait!  Ah!
 
The anxiety is something Im not used to... intimidated by it is a good word I guess... Lordy Im all over the place with this... now that I seriously thought about it Im even more scared. 
 
I should tell DH to club me over the head and do it, lol....[&o] (in the months of course[8|])  Insurance companies are just lovely.
 
 

I should tell DH to club me over the head and do it, lol....[&o] 

 
Wonderful plan! 
Amy, I am about your age and I just totally get a kick out of reading your posts.  You inspire me and I think you will be a great mother.  I read a lot more than I share on here, but I hope to chat with you as you go through this process.  My DH and I don't have kids yet, but they are in the near future.  I am sure I will learn a lot as you share your thoughts with us.  Thanks []
Christi

I feel your pain Amy...our situations are a little different but also very similiar.  I have had baby fever for a year or more now but not enough to beg DH to give me one now.  I have never been in a big hurry for things.  We were engaged for 4 years so I could finish college b/f we got married.  I am 27 and I have talked about it a lot and know I want kids for sure but am also a planner and a financial planner at that and always worry about if we are financially ready!!!  I always have a 5 year plan in place.  DH is 33 and thinks he is getting old for some reason.  (By the way, go with the insurance...you will probably be really glad you did at some point, even if there is a deductible....and what if you decide to have a second one right away and then there is no waiting period!  There are so many potential things that can go wrong....at least with insurance, even not so good insurance, you get discounted rates and 50% coverage I know with some.) 
 
So anyway, I went off of BC about three weeks ago for the first time in over 10 years and I am already worrying about how we will pay for college.  [8|]  I am also SO VERY inexperienced.  My sister in law made me feel so much better about this though b/c she was one of those people who wanted 100 babies and I always thought she had all this experience with kids.  I found out recently she had NONE and she did a great job with her son, in my opinion at least!!!  I HATED babysitting as a child and really know nothing but what I have picked up from pregnant women and my friends with kids.  It is amazing the things you can pick up from people! 
 
I read in a book that the best time to have a kid is when you are about 75% sure b/c then you heart and your head are aligned.  I think that was what it said, but it made sense.  I know that when I do get pregnant and have a child that I will rise to the occassion b/c it will be my child and I wouldn't have it any other way.  I am going through all the same fears you are.  It is so hard to think of my life changing so drastically but also very exciting. 
 
OK enough of my blabbering...just wanted you to know you are not alone.  There are probably a lot of us out there and even on idog, that are worried about how our bodies will change and more importantly how our lives will change.  At least we have a great support group here with many experienced people to tell us we are not crazy!     

Wow thank you Christi, you made me blush lol!  Glad to see your still around... even if your not posting much.  Very glad to see another my age who is around to share things with.  [] 
 
Sarah... so your trying now?  Yikes!  lol... yes, we can share our fears about this!  Thank you, Im very glad to see Im not alone, or strange, or selfish (unusually selfish that is) ...
 
 

Yes, we are "officially" trying now.  Of course, we are suppossed to wait 2 months after I went off the pill and I didn't go off until a certain time b/c I didn't want to get pregnant b/f a certain time but as my friends say, that is just me trying to plan it all.  They don't know what they are talking about though.  []  The Dr told me not to worry though if it happened before then but I am a stickler for the rules.  You are not selfish...if you are even considering trying and knowing how much committment it really takes, then I think you know you have it in you.  I sometime think I am selfish too, but I bet when it comes down to it in lots of situations, people probably think you are a very giving and unselfish erson even if you don't feel that you are.  Just from the little bit I know about you, I think you will prevail as a mommy!  Just be sure you are doing it b/c that is ultimately what you want in your life. 

Good luck in trying!  We will be the first to know... right?!![]
 
To the people who are already pregnant (congradulations!) and to those of us soon to be trying or trying.. please share your experiences!!

Amy, I breast fed 3 kids all until they were 10 months of age. My breast are not as pretty as they were, but they are pretty good with a good bra. The bra you have is soooo important. Breast feeding was the best thing ever.
 
Stretch marks, thats another thing. I used coco butter sticks and it really didn't help. I have HUGE stretch marks. BUT I also gained 70 lbs for my first.  I lost it all and gained 30 for the next, lost it all and gained 50 for my last. I lost it all, but put weight on last winter. Thats the first time I ever gained weight in my life. I bought Maderma cream, and it has really covered the stretch marks.
 
Good luck!!