Bittersweet day.

    • Gold Top Dog

    Bittersweet day.

    Last night as I was walking Romeo, I saw someone throw something out of the car and speed off.  My heart immediately told me it was a dog, and indeed it was.  Romeo went ballistic and the dog did not even try to move so I knew something was up.  I took Romeo home as fast as could and went back, I came across the dog and "my roamer" (different story) the one that had been just discarded off was having problems walking and breathing, so I called them to me and made myself as small as I possibly could facing them away, held out a big piece of beef liver on my hand, the older one eventually made it all the way "my roamer" stood a couple of feet back.  I slowly turned around gave him the food, let him smelled me and gently touched his side and worked my way up to his collar, he still had tags, but only old rabies tags, no name.  I was not surprised, so now what to do? I tried to get the older dog to walk, but he would not budge (panting really fast and I could hear something from his chest) so I decided to pick him up (cattle dog mix) and carried him home, had to stop a couple of times he was heavy, "my roamer" followed cautiously.  When I made it home, I put him in my patio, I had already called my dad to tell him to put fresh water and food out for the dogs.  The older one ate 4 large cans of Innova and the roamer ate 6 /8oz rabbit burgers, at first I only gave him 3 but seeing he was so hungry...after they ate and drank water we all passed out and slept all night.  ( My dad kept Romeo in my room)

    Well, this morning I got up really early to walk Romeo, but he saw the dogs and went crazy again, stupid me I came up from behind and tried to grab him, he turned and pounced, got me by the corner of my eye, broke some skin, it freaked him out because the moment I said ouch he looked horrified, forgot about the dogs and started to lick my face, had to clean up the wound and all of that. 

    After I walked Romeo, I walked the other dog, by this time I had already called my vet and she was on her way over, after their walk (with "my roamer" always a couple of feet behind) we went back to the apt and they ate just as much as last night.  The vet came over did tests on the older dog, because the other will not let you come close,  and as I was afraid:  hw +, his ears in pretty bad shape, and also she said he must have had a problem with his hips and legs as he was very wobbly, and he cried in pain when she examined him, he had a pretty bad heart murmur and his lungs did not sound great either, and he had all kinds of worms.  She said I could take him to animal control since he had tags, or the SPCA, but she said because of his age and condition more than likely they will put him down.  In the meantime, my father had been calling different rescue organizations and the answer was "no, we are full"; I decided not to take him to the SPCA, but let my vet do it.

    Now, I feel so guilty and have not been able to stop crying.  That dog trusted me, and what did I do?  I did talked to him before,  I apologized to him, because his humans had not been as loyal to him as I am sure he was to them.  I also apologized because I was not going to be able to keep him, I told him he was very sick, and the place where he was going, was a beautiful place and I described it, the whole time this dog did not take his eyes off of me, neither did the other one, his breathing became elaborated you could tell it was hard for him to breath, it was hard for him to walk too, he would take a couple of steps and he would fall to the ground, after I said my good bye and apologized a million times, I laid down next to him, held him as tight and softly as I could and let the vet first sedate and then give him the last injection, he somehow rotated his head,  looked at me, licked my hand and faded away, as I laid there stroking the dog as he died, the roamer had quietly made his way inside had laid down next to me, and had rested his head on the curve of my waist and just watched.  I am having him cremated and I am going to bury him in my mom's garden by some pretty sunflowers that she has. 

    I don't know now if I made the right thing, my vet said was the most humane thing to do.

    My roamer is a sharpei mix that has been in the area since last October and no one can catch this dog, I mean no one, not animal control, no one.  I gave been giving him food and water, or at least I leave it where I know he is going to be, he usually will not eat until I have walked away, he has never let me come close enough to him to touch him, but last night was different and today too.  Usually once he eats, he leaves and sometimes I will see him in the evenings or it will be days before I see him again.  Today though he has hung around, not in my patio, but across from my apartment, he is laying on the grass under a tree asleep.  I have been working so hard to gain this dog's trust and now I don't know what will happen.  Now he probably thinks the same thing will happen to him if he does.

    I am mortified, it has been a very emotionally draining day.  I am glad my dad took Romeo to day care, because I am in need of some me time right now.

    I am sorry for the very long post, grammatical errors, etc,  but I needed to share with people who understand.  God, I just hope I did the right thing by this dog and may he run free at the Rainbow Bridge. [:(]
    • Gold Top Dog
    I'm sorry you had to go through such a heart-wrenching experience, but it does sound like the right thing to have done...sounds like the HW was very advanced.  The poor dog must have been miserable.  Bless you for being so compassionate...
    • Gold Top Dog
    That's heartbreaking, but I do think you did the right thing.  He didn't really have much of a chance and so much better to end life with someone loving you than to be terrified and scared in a cage. [:(
     
    I think your roamer understood, and I hope he fully trusts you some day.
    • Gold Top Dog
    Well my heart goes out to you. Finding a stray, let alone a injured one is always tough. I remember finding a cat with a broken leg, styaing up with it all night and when the vet opened the next day it turned out she was pregnant!
    Anywho, you DID do the right thing. Even if you wanted to help or keep the oldie he is in need of some serious care which would be costly. As for your "roamer" I can almost guarantee you he has no idea what happened to the otehr dog, how could he?If anything it seesm that your comassion for he otehr dog has made your "roamer" more open to you.
    • Gold Top Dog
    It's good to know there are people like you scattered around looking out for dogs in unfortunate situations. That probably doesn't make you feel much better, but I think you did what was best and the dogs I'm sure appreciate your kindness.
    • Gold Top Dog
    I think you did the right thing. 
     
    On the other hand, I can't imagine a place where a roamer runs free for 9 months or so because nobody can catch him.  
    • Gold Top Dog
    It always hurts to put a dog down, or any other animal...especially when it is not yours.
     
    One thing is for sure...you did NOTHING wrong.  In fact, you probably did more right for that dog in the last 24 hours than his former "family" did for him in his life time.  He was old, he was crippled with heart worms, his death probably wasn't far off anyway, and rather than allow him to suffer anymore, you did the compassionate thing and let him go.
     
    I'm sure he was terrified being chucked from a car, and terrified being taken to someplace strange...but I'm also sure the he knew you were for his good, and that you were only helping, not hurting.  If there is one thing I know about dogs, it is that they have a huge capacity to forgive.  They don't forget, but they forgive.  And, with you, overall he probably thought there was nothing to forgive you for, and was probably grateful that you let him go in peace.
     
    As for your roamer, I wish you great luck with him.  Perhaps a humane trap would work (Camoflauged).  It stinks, but I think one moment of betrayal is worth it to get him a home permanently.
    • Gold Top Dog
    You are an angel, and now you have one waiting for you at the Bridge.  I hope the SOB that threw the dog out never has another happy day.
    • Gold Top Dog
    You did the humane thing.  After being thrown out of a car - outcasted - you gave him a last little bit of dignity.
    • Gold Top Dog
    Thank you for all your replies.  I lit up a candle for him and said the prayer of St. Francis of Assisi ( I am Catholic and he is the saint defender of animals who lived surrounded by wolves).  I know he is in a better place and this brings me a little comfort.
     
    Willow--I know is hard to believe, he is amazing.  Even though my driver's license says "Houston", I live 20 miles outside of the city, is not very developed and there are a lot of country roads  a lot of forest, so you see rabbits, squirrels, deer, cows, all kinds of animals.  He is my superstar for having survived all this time.  I have made fliers of the picture I was able to take of him once and posted all over, but nothing and because he is always going up and down early in the morning and evening, people around here already know him and do not bother him which is good. 
     
    I live on the first floor and across my building there is some sort of a courtyard flanked by two other buildings, well he dug a little, I supposed to have some cooler dirt and has been asleep since this morning, every now and then he will raise his head look over my way and goes back to sleep.  If he so much sees you approach him he gets up and runs away, before yesterday he would have never come back, but today he has, hopefully a good sign.  I hope to gain his trust little by little, my vet fell in love with him and said she will keep him. 
     
    • Gold Top Dog
    The greatest gift we can give to our furry friends is a sweet and gentle release from their pains, and death with dignity.  Wow, this guy died in your ARMS....feeling LOVE and compassion.  What a way to go....just a gentle drifting off to sleep in the arms of someone who gave a damned.
     
    Bless you for giving him that gift.
     
    Run free sweet boy.
    • Gold Top Dog
    What a very sad story...do not think for one moment you betrayed that dog! You didn't. You ended his suffering!
    • Gold Top Dog
    So sorry for the pain you feel but you did the best you could for the old man and I am sure he is at the Rainbow Bridge talking about the sweet lady who loved him enough to send him there!   Unlike the poor unfortunates who die unloved he has someone to wait for to cross over with!  Bless you for having the courage to help and not pass it on to the pound to do. 
     
    As for the 9 month roamer - I read in news about a golden retriever that had been on the lam for 2 years. He escaped right after being brought home.  The new owners, neighbors and even Animal Control all tried to capture him.   He outfoxed them all!  I believe it took a ACC officer with a net gun to capture him finally. 
    It happens sometimes and should not reflect negatively on your efforts.  He has made contact with you once - in time he will again. 
     
    Bless you again for caring.
     
     
    • Gold Top Dog
    You did not betray this dog.  Instead you gave him a moment of dignity, a moment so pure that it has touched your heart and ours.  The trust that this dog had in you was completed by your act to end his suffering.  If he could have spoken to you he would have said his thanks.

    I've never seen a more selfless action.  Thank you for sharing this with us.  I think this dog was cast off near you for a reason.
    • Gold Top Dog
    Thank you for sharing this.  It is so sad to hear about dogs who have been mistreated like this.  I think that the lick on your hand that he gave you was a thank you.