delete

HMM well..either way foods or no foods, meds or no meds...kids need to learn what is NOT appropriate...and have it stick. He will come across things in life and school that he cannot always control, and he needs to have some sort of base of appropriate behaviors and such to operate from.

It's something to balance...yes a diet or a med help but NO they are not lifetime fixes for a problem and you need to have some other tricks in the sleeve to use "just in case". Always use the time when he is not acting out to again and again stress what sort of problem solving he can do himself, to avoid bad situations. If he is ADHD impulse control is a HUGE issue and as he becomes a teen or adult controlling it by diet may not be something he wants to or will continue with...so just make sure he knows HOW to approach people, situations, and boundaries in the socially accepted way as much as possible.

Hope tomorrow is a better day at school for you guys!

I have to admit that I didn't understand initially how important his diet was. Hearing about how it affects him and his learning so, I think I'm starting to get it. I too am on a regimented diet, some by choice (which since I'm off at school, I'll be flexible on, but in the future I probably won't be) and some is by absolutely necessary.

I get upset when my college doesn't have foods that I can eat, a teacher in the position of being in charge of young children really needs to understand the affects it has on him. I'm sorry she doesn't. Good luck with a doctor telling them it needs to be this way. And yeah, I'd be upset too.

Shammy, I think you're on the right track with having the doctor right that note.  Otherwise you're taking the chance that something like this will happen everytime there is a class party or celebration.  It sounds like today was something unplanned, but for parties, maybe you could confirm with the people planning them and make something similar for Noah that he can have.  Also, are there any gluten free snacks you can give the teacher to keep on hand for days like today?  Noah's diagnosis is fairly new, right?  It's going to take him some time to be able to have better control over himself after a dietary slip.  I think it's more maturing than anything.  As our youngest got older, he was able to have a little bit of something that usualy set him off, not because he was "out growing" his reactions, but because he was learning how to control his impulses.

delete

micksmom

think it's more maturing than anything.  As our youngest got older, he was able to have a little bit of something that usualy set him off, not because he was "out growing" his reactions, but because he was learning how to control his impulses.

Right. This is what I mean when I say talk, every chance you get about problem solving (like with social stories mentioned earlier by mrv I think) and even how he's feeling and what he can do now, at his young age to help with that. Even just him telling someone like his teacher, that he's feeling busy or that he needs to move around...so she can have him pass out papers or run a note to another class or sharpen pencils...things like this really can help a child feel some control.

It DOES come more with maturity...but it can't come without him being shown and talked to at length about what to do when whatever method you use is not available. Once they have felt that calmness they do desire it more...it comes with time but they have to learn how to find that calm place on their own at some point too, I do believe that.

shamrockmommy

It doesn't quite "click" with him. He can repeat back everything we talk about, his plan to deal with frustration, the fact that it is not ok to touch others for any reason but he seems to have some trouble getting it to stick

This is even an issue with a young child that DOESN'T have ADHD lol, I have one of each so I know! all of us parents sometimes feel like broken records lol. But it DOES stick eventually, I promise! Just be consistent and keep trying...hang in there! [:)}

shamrockmommy

I do worry about how to teach him impulse control. We go over how to deal with frustration and anger every morning before school.  Also the potty issue, I make sure he knows if he is having trouble deciding on continuing with a task or needing to go potty he should always choose the potty.

It doesn't quite "click" with him. He can repeat back everything we talk about, his plan to deal with frustration, the fact that it is not ok to touch others for any reason but he seems to have some trouble getting it to stick.

He has had an excellent last 2 weeks, NO problems whatsoever, teacher noted a big chnge and then today with the pinching issue after the cookie.

DH is urging me to do a charter school. Not only would it be tailored to Noah but it would also work well with our military lifestyle and all the 'freakin' moving!

Something to think about I guess.

Gina was right about the not clicking being normal, even for kids who don't have ADHD.  Again, it's a maturity thing- the young ones are still learning how to curb that impulsiveness,  It just takes some longer than others.  :)  Hang in there, you will get a handle on it.

The charter school thing- the way you described it it sounds somewhat like home schooling (here in NJ we have actual schools that are charter schools).  My only concern would be socialization.  It might be even harder for Noah to learn self control if he isn't with other kids.  Other than that, it does sound like a good idea, given how often you're moving.

delete

It is not reasonable to expect a kid to follow a gluten free diet.  Heck, I have trouble and no longer go to Christmas parties in the building because the cookies are too dammm tempting.

Second.  and yes I am shouting here.  GET A 504 PLAN now. (a binding legal document that identified the special accommodations needed by a specific child under the 1978 Rehabilitation Act).   If you do not make the situation formal and serious, teachers will fall back into default behaviors.  We all do it.  We are genetically programed to save energy in all forms.  Dealing with one child on special diet, on top of all the other child specific needs in classroom means that if you do not have CLEAR cues in the environment you will fall back in to the pattern that has worked in the past.

 If you want to do this (gluten free awareness) well, contact my friend Laura Karasek through Facebook.  She has a business allergy conceirge.  In fact, our PTO has brought her to school twice for gluten free cooking demos.  She is likely to help you write a letter or information page that you can include with class newletters that will offer ideas and information about gluten free.  If parents who are bringing in treats realize the concerns, they will often step up and bring a variety of treats to help out kids.  How many kids with diabets get forgotten and end up with to much sugar and carbs at a class party.

I understand your frustration.  Yes in schools we should be perfect in meeting all kids needs all day every day.  But, if you want us to do that, then help us.  We want to do better.  You can help with that. 

It would be in your child's best interest to start developing these strategies and documents.  You can be proactive since the reality for your kids is multiple schools.  The documents (504 or IEP if that occurs) are your gateway to the special accommodations or services Noah may need.  You dont want to start at ground zero every time there is a school or class change.

mrv

...Second.  and yes I am shouting here.  GET A 504 PLAN now. (a binding legal document that identified the special accommodations needed by a specific child under the 1978 Rehabilitation Act).   If you do not make the situation formal and serious, teachers will fall back into default behaviors.  We all do it.  We are genetically programed to save energy in all forms.  Dealing with one child on special diet, on top of all the other child specific needs in classroom means that if you do not have CLEAR cues in the environment you will fall back in to the pattern that has worked in the past...

Good point.  I was assuming Noah had a 504 or IEP. 

shamrockmommy

I got an email from his teacher- which is great, I like to know- but then she said "oh by the way, a class helper brought in some cookies today and gave noah one who took 2 bites of it before I realized it probably had gluten in it."

Shammy I forgot...my dh actually made a good point last night. Cookies in and of themselves...cause excitement in kids because they are a treat...even if he had not had ANY of the cookie the pure novelty of a "treat" in a classroom where such is not routine can trigger MANY kids without attention issues to get very riled up.

This is why in our school things sent for birthdays and such are ONLY given out as the kids are released at the bell. It's not really the TREAT itself that causes the hyper...it's the fact that it is exciting and novel.

I have been at this point to MANY classroom parties and celebrations...and trust me Elias has a HARD time being still and following rules at those...but so does EVERY SINGLE CHILD in the room LOL! It takes the teacher and a few parents to keep a rein on things...and this includes my daughter's 3rd grade class!

So don't consider just the food...consider the circumstances AROUND it. And also consider that if your boy is a smarty pants and KNOWS you have him on this diet for his behavior...he may at some point USE that to misbehave...kids are very tricky at times.

rwbeagles

shamrockmommy

I got an email from his teacher- which is great, I like to know- but then she said "oh by the way, a class helper brought in some cookies today and gave noah one who took 2 bites of it before I realized it probably had gluten in it."

Shammy I forgot...my dh actually made a good point last night. Cookies in and of themselves...cause excitement in kids because they are a treat...even if he had not had ANY of the cookie the pure novelty of a "treat" in a classroom where such is not routine can trigger MANY kids without attention issues to get very riled up.

This is why in our school things sent for birthdays and such are ONLY given out as the kids are released at the bell. It's not really the TREAT itself that causes the hyper...it's the fact that it is exciting and novel.

I have been at this point to MANY classroom parties and celebrations...and trust me Elias has a HARD time being still and following rules at those...but so does EVERY SINGLE CHILD in the room LOL! It takes the teacher and a few parents to keep a rein on things...and this includes my daughter's 3rd grade class!

So don't consider just the food...consider the circumstances AROUND it. And also consider that if your boy is a smarty pants and KNOWS you have him on this diet for his behavior...he may at some point USE that to misbehave...kids are very tricky at times.

Gina, yup, correlation doesn't mean cause. Especially if you are expecting to see a certain thing, you're likely to see it. If you really want to maintain this diet, you might want to just send a box of some sort of treat for him in these occasions. No questions, even if the item might be ok, they just serve the child his or her own special item. The children who I work with who are on non-medically necessary diets are generally allowed an exception for special events, and for the medically necessary ones, they send their own comparable item.

griffinej5

If you really want to maintain this diet, you might want to just send a box of some sort of treat for him in these occasions. No questions, even if the item might be ok, they just serve the child his or her own special item. The children who I work with who are on non-medically necessary diets are generally allowed an exception for special events, and for the medically necessary ones, they send their own comparable item.

My aunt has one with Celiac and his mom gave her a box of "treats" at the beginning of the year, so anytime there's a surprise treat that the mom can't plan for, my aunt can give him one out of her box.

delete