How do you let them go?

You did a great job.....they are so adorable and beautiful!

whtsthfrequency

And now they’re gone. I actually started sniffling when I was putting away all of the little kitten toys in a box. Wow. Have you guys ever had some foster like this? Tell me stories, I need to feel like not quite a huge mushpot J

 

Stories......hmmmm you want stories,,,    I guess first I would tell you , that I have found when you invest the best of yourself into something, someone who is to be "temporary" in your life you would think you could hold back and only give a little bit. Just enough to keep them healthy and growing. 

Then it occurs to you that they need a bit of handling to avoid being fearful.... and a bit of extra care because they are not growing as you had pictured, instead of being fat and sassy little ones you have these skinny, scrawny little bits, and that won't do.... you want them to be picked first... not last, so you think some more and find the treats that tempt and encourage appetite.  Well how about that, ? As you find the good stuff you realize they are feeling so much better that you must laugh at the return of enthusiasm and adventure....try as you might you realize they have personalities, this one is a trouble magnet, and that one a snuggle buddy.... if you hold a bit of treat just so they figured out what you want and presto like magic you have one who sits or high fives, who comes instead of hides... Of course you are only spending the extra time with them out of curiosity or darn it because they just need to "know things" and you have some insight that may teach them ....

I dogress are we talking about Children or Foster Animals ??   About something you took on in a effort to help or connect... or about something you actually bred and brought into the world?? Does it really make a difference?

I have NEVER been able to let go easily.   I weep when it is time for the pups to go to their forever families and don't get me started on that first day of school !! Saying goodbye, even for just a bit at the airport to any loved one is a certainty I will need the nearest Ladies room to weep for a bit and then splash water on my face to allow me to drive home.

There are those who can help without investing.  My hat is off to them.    They see and accept a job and handle it with competence and skill.  They may take a photo or three to put in an ever growing scrap book of the souls they have helped, that have passed through their lives.  They are not inconvienced  by the pain of eventual loss or the fear of failure. I think they are Older Souls that have learned how to help without getting messy.  My soul some days is still very much in the toddler stage.

So  there are the "mushpots"  like us   Yes I use all the crayons in the box, and I like to add flowers or write in that silly gel on top of a cake.  Why do something halfway when each adventure that is offered to us is a chance to know ourselves better and to learn something deeper or see something almost missed in the Universe?  On my Left wrist I bear the scars of a razor and a night so dark I lost sight of how really Blessed I was.   Rather than allow insurance to remove the scars  and the embarrassment or questions,  I recognize them for what they are, a warning  that life IS finite and we all have to make choices. Not all of them are winners.

I can walk your dog for $5.00 and it will potty in an acceptable place and return home with a less full bladder but bored and lonely. OR I can play with your dog for $5.00 and we can find a bug to watch,  run till our hearts pound,  that toy tucked in my back pocket  made for one excellent tug of war.... your dog comes home comfortable, and willing to wait for you and I had an adventure that lifted my spirits and possibly those of the person sitting alone who watched the happy dog or heard my laughter.... Ripples in a pond, right  ?

I have a LOT of stories,  about actual pups , kittens , ponies  and Kids.  Glance through the photo heavy profile and you will find many of them there.  But all of them come back to what I have just shared.  The World NEEDS mushpots.  It needs someone to add the memory that may change a life, that for a moment thought about the need of another rather than avoiding the possible pain.  The kittens you cared for at a wild guess will be independent, curious, capable of chin bumps and deep contented purrs, that will find the adventure waiting in the new life and bring it to the surface making that new friend their FAMILY without ever forgetting you.

   THAT has to be something to be very proud of,  I would suggest you , you old Mushpot, did a very, very good thing.

Bonita of Bwana

I did the same thing years ago.  I worked at a vet and we got a call that an officer was bringing in a dead cat.  She attacked some guy and they killed her.  We were going to remove the head for a rabies test.

The box was all taped up it was middle of summer..it was hot.  We open the box and two black babies were still attached to their dead Momma. She was probably protecting her babies from the idiot.

They must have been only 2 days old.  I cared for them from then on until they were of age.  I lived in an apartment that didn't allow pets so I took them with me to work in my purse/bag.  Every day.

I placed one but kept the other.  I felt horrible that I gave her away.  That they got seperated....I missed her terribly.

Their names?  Tia and Tamara.  Two girls.  I kept Tia.  Tia passed away at 16yrs old.  I think it's been 2 years....

Those kittens are precious!  Good work!

The last kitten I fostered was found abandoned in a hollow tree at 3-5 weeks old.  I was able to find her a home rather quickly because just the week before, someone had told me she wanted to get a cat and had this fascination with bottle feeding it.  Just her luck, I had this tiny kitten that still needed to be weaned!  I called her Princess but she was named Keena.

My latest fosters were not kittens, 18 month old brothers.  Great cats, both of them, even though they had opposite personalities.  Since they were young and healthy, I found their homes relatively quickly (2 weeks).

I was supposed to be getting a kitten my friends found, but one of them decided to keep it. 

I do miss them all, but I have three cats of my own.  I don't think I'd be able to let them go if I didn't have any cats of my own!

think of it this way - if you kept all of them, not only would no one else be able to enjoy them, but you wouldn't be able to open your home to another kitten in need. The youngest I've had were 3-4 days old. I had one make it, and I was very attached. He was a mush, so sweet, but I knew that I can't keep them all (I already have 5!). I stick mainly with the older ones, because they are not so time demanding.

I am very selective on where they go, when they do get adopted. If I don't feel right, they are not going home.

The photo of the two of them at 15 weeks is great. What a handsome boy the tabby is...just stunning. Not to leave out the little girl, she is very cute as well. I'm in that situation right now and I just don't know how I'm going to let my 4 go. I rescued them from woods in a park, where someone had dumped them. They were about 6 weeks old and so eating on their own, but a bit on the wild side. I've been having to work with getting their trust and so of course that is forming a bond between us....one I'm not sure I'll be able to break. I haven't had a lot of experience, with foster animals in my own home, but have done some and some have stayed and others have gone on to a great home. It's never easy, but when we know that the perfect home has come along, it makes it possible to let them go. Some of them just tug at our hearts more than others though.

Thanks guys....the little ones seem to be doing pretty well in their new place. And Bonita, thank you especially for that response, it almost brought tears to my eyes. 

The way I do it is to treat them just like I would treat my students as a teacher.  When you teach you get this class for a set period of time.  A "school year". 

In that time you have certain knowledge and skills you try to impart - you try to teach them what they need FROM YOU to survive and prosper in the future.  What they learn from you they will build on later, so you teach them what they need *today* to move forward and build on.

Yeah -- we're still talking KIDS here -- but it's the same way when you foster.  When you send them to forever homes you are simply "promoting" them to the rest of their lives.  You will always remember them, love them and have stories about them -- but you prepared them for what comes next in their lives.  Hopefully you prepared them to be **successful** in the rest of their lives.

You let them go by realizing that your little piece of this will live forever in their hearts.  They will ALWAYS recognize you ... but most of all, you will change lives of the people who will love them.  Because of you, those animals will be able to enter successfully into someone else's lives.  You taught them the basics so they could go on and learn the rest of what they'll need to know to be happy with those people.  But you started it!!

If you keep them, you limit the impact YOU can have on the world.  If you keep them all you can't help more.  Others will suffer and die because foster homes can't be found if everyone keeps their fosters.  So you spread it on ... and on ... and on.

I have no sage advice, other than I would be proud of myself if I were you;-) You saved two lovely kittens;-). 

I liken it to, carrying a baby for 40 weeks, getting sick, getting big, feeling the baby move, and a parent knew they couldn't keep the child so they gave it up to a family that could give it everything it couldn't, out of love;-)

Now, that I reread this, it doesn't sound quite right!  I hope you get my gist.  It was a wonderful thing you did,  In time your pain will be replaced with fond memories;-)

 AWWW, I want one.  It's been so long since I've had a kitten I could just take a basket full.

I'm speechless, the female cat looks so much like my Zarina!! WOW

You made a very good job and the life of those cats is better because of you!