Dog Community

Feeling Guilty

Posted : 10/4/2006 6:41:05 PM

My SO and I are friends with 2 other couples who both got puppies around the same time we got Ben. They are all different breeds, but all 3 are within 5 days of each other in age. Whenever we saw either of them we'd have fun talking and comparing puppy notes - easy to do when someone else has a puppy pretty much exactly the same age as yours.

We heard yesterday that one of the other puppies went to the Bridge this weekend because of kidney failure - Charlie, a Cavalier King Charles, was not yet 6 months old. [

] The other puppy, Rupert the Mini Schnauzer, was very very ill for a while, and thanks to about $10 000 worth of vet care and treatment he's fine now, though his growth has been permanently stunted and he's about 2/3 the size he should be.

I feel HORRIBLE...not only for my friends who have had to go through these ordeals, but because I find myself feeling glad that it's not me. Ben is as strong as an ox, and his only emergency vet visit came from eating something he shouldn't. I feel lucky, and then feel guilty for feeling so lucky. My friends are devastated, what right do I have to be thinking about me and my dog? [

]

All of our dogs were/are well bred animals with good pedigrees. I guess it just shows that things can always happen.

I'm sorry, I just had to get this out. I feel like a horrible person. Run free, Charlie. [sm=angel.gif]

Kate

whatsh0uldmyl0ginbe?

Posted : 10/4/2006 6:45:43 PM

Don't feel bad! I'd feel lucky too. Poor things, just shows what a commitment puppies are..Run free Charlie.

ewin0210

Posted : 10/4/2006 6:46:32 PM

Kate please don't beat yourself up. The fact that you have so much empathy for your friends shows what a caring person you are. And the feelings you have of being glad its not you is only natural. I think we've all felt that way at one time or another. PLease give my condolences to your friends. That must be so horrible.

nyiceprincess

Posted : 10/4/2006 8:18:29 PM

I would certainly feel bad for them but not guilty for having a healthy dog.Maybe next time one of your friends is looking for a dog you can help them and make sure they find a reputable breeder that does health testing so they can have a better chance at getting a healthy pup too.

fuzzy_dogs_mom

Posted : 10/4/2006 8:24:40 PM

Kate, don't let yourself feel guilty for being glad that Ben is healthy. It's not like you're saying you're happy that the other dogs were sick. I read somewhere, long ago, that the reason some people start giggling at funerals is because deep down they're glad it's not them - not necessarily because they're glad the other person is dead. Make sense?

Joyce

Benedict

Posted : 10/4/2006 8:42:56 PM

Thanks everyone. What you're saying makes sense and I'll do my best to remember it.

I am so grateful that I have a healthy dog - crazy, but healthy lol - and just feel so bad for my friends. I know how devastated I'd be to lose Ben and they are going through that right now. I'll do my best to help them in any way I can.

nyiceprincess - thanks, and that is good advice, but they were/are both very well-bred dogs, from reputable breeders that do health testing. This was just bad luck.

Thanks again, all of you. You're a fantastic bunch.

Kate

agilebasenji

Posted : 10/4/2006 9:45:15 PM

I bet you're not really feeling "I'm glad it happened to them and not me" but more "I'm glad that didn't happen to Ben." You're grateful for what you have.

sue fitzpatrick FITZPATRICK

Posted : 10/5/2006 3:47:41 PM

Life happens-too dogs as well....We went along feeling quite proud of ourselves-a house full of seniors-the eldest was almost 17, and of course we somewhat assumed that the others would have an equally long run, because they were all cared for in the same way and had the same vet attention. Who would have thought that we would lose the youngest one first to kidney failure at 8 1/2 and within four months time, would lose all three.....I certainly do understand that it is sometimes circumstances beyond our control, and being relieved that your pup is healthy is not a reflection on your ability to value other dogs or people's feeling about their dogs. Thank the Lord for your blessing and pray that your friends are equally blessed in the future. And hope again for a happy time, when you can all trade stories and share experiences with your animals