Dog Community

4 deaths in 4 months

Posted : 6/13/2006 8:31:09 AM

In the last 4 months I have had 3 close deaths, of high school friends. People that should have just been beginning to live are already dead. And just a few minutes ago I fond out that another one is dead. Another one, barely 19 years old. I cry for him, and I cry for all those friends that have died, and for the ones that are alive and having to suffer all of these tragedies. It makes me see that I am not an all powerful, invincible teenager. These people thought they were and look what happened.

I am getting old before my time. I am not suppose to go to my friends funeral yet!! They are not supposed to get their high school diploma from their coffin, that is not at all funny. I wonder who will be next. We lost the first one in a motorcycle accident. Irresponsibility was key. His beautiful face was forever disfigured, I still wake up crying at night when I think of his face, so beautiful in that picture above the coffin, and how it was forever changed in less than a minute. February 15th was the day we lost this 17 year old baby and I will NEVER as long as I live forget him. RIP

The second, a wild child 18 year old, she was so full of life. I#%92d only spoken to her a few times, but her death struck me hard. She was 5 months pregnant when she was hospitalized with bronchitis. She got a bacteria and passed away 2 weeks after the first.

Two weeks ago another went. This one was about 20, and living in a rough neighborhood. He was hit by 9 bullets in a confusion, and now this baby will be forever gone.

And now this one. He is one of the ones that most affects me, because now it is very real that the world makes unexpected turns, and that anyone, anywhere can be next. He was on his motorcycle on his way to work. And 100 yards from his job, a car almost hit him and swerving to avoid the collision he hit the sidewalk, and there goes another angel.

I don#%92t know what to do anymore…. I feel so lost

RileysMommy

Posted : 6/13/2006 8:38:46 AM

I am so sorry for your losses. It is a rough time for you but it can only make you stronger as you go through life.

{{hugs}} for you.

~Mary

Benedict

Posted : 6/13/2006 8:39:16 AM

Lizzie, I am so sorry. I have had friends die very young too, and it is so hard to handle - I am still not completely over their deaths, to be honest.

I wish I knew what to say, but know that my thoughts are with you.

Kate

glenmar

Posted : 6/13/2006 8:43:06 AM

Not to get all religious on you, but I firmly believe that everything happens for a reason. What that reason is, we may never know, but there IS a reason. It's not just random.

My thots and prayers are with you tho as you deal with such crushing loss.

huskymom

Posted : 6/13/2006 9:39:28 AM

Lizzie, I am soo sorry for you loss. I know how you feel. I lost my best friend in the world to Cancer 2 years ago, and I still feel the crushing loss everytime I think of him. Young people are not supposed to die. I wish I could offer you advice on how to get over this, but honestly I don't think it ever gets easier. All I can offer you is my condolences. And that you have.

boneyjean

Posted : 6/13/2006 10:23:25 AM

I am so sorry you have had to deal with so much loss all at once.

I can also feel your pain. I lost my cousin 2 years ago (Man I can't believe it has already been two years) and that dreadful day and week will forever be in my memory. I still hurt for him. This year, I lost my father in law to cancer...2 months to the day after he found out. It was almost worst watching him suffer and dying then letting him go. Then a month later, one of my good friends step dad had a brain anneurism and was found dead at home when they got home from work. I feel the same as Glenda, as unfair as it may seem, everything happens for a reason. There is nothing that will make the pain go away but you will learn to deal with it and hopefully if nothing else, it will help open your eyes to the fact that we are not immortal. The only certainty in life is death and we will all face it as some point in our life. Talking about it can be a good way to deal with it. There are also grief support groups you can go to where there are people dealing with the same feelings you are having. I know 2 people who are going to those groups and have found them very helpful and comforting.

dackelfan

Posted : 6/13/2006 10:23:45 AM

I am so sorry for your losses. It's been similar for me. I have had 4 friends from school die from the time I was seven to age 16, then one we used to hang out with and partied with and then my best friend due to a workaccident. Then for 10 years things were okay and then in the past 2 years we lost 3 more people: my brother, my mom and then someone who used to live here lost their child a couple months back. All these losses have left their marks on my life. Things have never been the same, but life still goes on somehow. There is an online griefgroup I had turned to and they have helped me a lot just by listening to all of my emotions that have flooded me when I felt like people got tired of listening to me these people were still there for me, they understood. I hope I can post this link here: it's [linkhttp://www.grief_group@yahoogroups.com]www.grief_group@yahoogroups.com[/link] Take care.

loveukaykay

Posted : 6/13/2006 10:38:21 AM

Im very sorry Lizze. Thats life... You just go through day to day and do the best you can and sometimes thing come out of nowhere and BAM.... its like we live in glass bottles of bodies and they can break at any time. All you can do it live life to the fullest and love and enjoy what you can while you are here. Try not to let it bring you down, use it as motivation to make the most of your time. Good luck, Im sorry your dealing with this.

Julitza

Posted : 6/13/2006 12:51:08 PM

Thanks to evryone for their support. Even though I have only been here for a short while I knew I could count on everyone.

I agree Glenda, everything happens for a reason. But I am still trying to figure out the reason why so many people who didnt even get a chance to start living, lost their lives.
I guess when the pain has numbed itself a bit (because the pain will never go away, I can tell you that from when I lost a cousin when I was 7) I will be able to cope better with the situation.

This just makes me scared, I mean sometimes I wake up and go look at my son and I think 'Will this be the last time I will see him?' Makes me paranoid that my friends are dying so quickly. Now I know how my great grandmother feels everytime one of her friends die. We just wonder 'are we next?'

ron2

Posted : 6/13/2006 5:53:01 PM

I know too well how you feel. It never gets easier. You just learn to live with it.This will ruin my tough guy rep, but, oh well. A teddy bear to sleep with helps when someone close to you has passed. I had one that helped when my mother passed on. It helped again when my first wife passed on. I've lost my father. 4 friends, a dozen of my second wife's family members. And I've grieved for friends who have lost their friends and family.

You'll make it. You find what you have to do in life and stick to that and let the good memories accompany you.

gradyupmybutt

Posted : 6/13/2006 8:56:58 PM

Teddy bears are great! When my mom died & then the next month my grandmother died my mom's teddy bear helped me sleep & was just there when I needed to cry & felt like I had cried to all my friends once too often. All I can say is my heart is with you & I'm sending cyber hugs your way.