Dog Community

Brother In Law Dies

Posted : 1/20/2007 6:05:30 PM

Well here's a good one for you..My husband's (passsed away 4 yrs. ago this Sept)borther, (my brother in law) passed away and NO one was told except HIS immediate family. Not even his other brother or sister. I found out by reading the local newspaper that happened to be at the food court where a friend of mine from church and I stopped to have a light lunch. I was stunned. I STILL have heard NOTHING from anyone except that I called his brother from out of town and told him. But his daughter had seen it in the paper and already called him. He was at Fred's funeral and I haven't heard or talked to him since. Not a very closed knit family..that's for sure. He apparently had a immediate family type service and no one else was there except them. And then he was cremated. I don't know if I should call the sister in law or not. I did inform them about Fred but don't you think this is weird?
Any insite from anyone? Advice??

Michelle

Posted : 1/20/2007 6:33:37 PM

Wonder if the circumstances were especially difficult or something, like suicide or something of that nature? I think I would call. What's the worst, they hang up and never call you again?

fuzzy_dogs_mom

Posted : 1/20/2007 7:53:42 PM

Yes. Weird and then some. Usually family members are notified first, even if you have to enlist the aid of a friend to help make the phone calls.

Joyce

bragg1120

Posted : 1/20/2007 10:53:13 PM

I'm so sorry to hear your news. I would call to give condolences... ask if anything is needed, the worst they could do is hang up. Some families are odd... when my Dad was going thru heart surgery (5 passes) everyone knew about it and we had so much support. When my uncle went thru his heart surgery, NOBODY knew until after he came home. Some people react differently in these situations. I would think that support is something everyone would need.

gail_j

Posted : 1/22/2007 12:42:54 PM

Thanks for all the advise. I think I will get a card to let them know that I know and will say inside that I have notified his brother and sister. I know he didn't kill himself..He was very sick with emphazimz(sp?)and had lost one lung I think at some time or other. I know his Dad only had one lung. If I rmember it right the Dad lost it from cancer and I know the son John had cancer. But even so I would of thought they would of notified me as I live in the same town and had just talked to his daughter (the one they kicked out of the house when she came home preg. and threw bleach all over her..Mom was washing floors at the time so then their daughter came and lived with us until the baby was born etc. etc. That was 23 or so years ago and nowhat baby just got married two years ago). Didn't let me know she was getting married either. Then not that long ago..maybe a month or less that I had talked to her to my niece. But for now that is the most I can do I guess. Thanks again for all the help!!

dyan

Posted : 1/23/2007 9:36:21 AM

Thats weird Gail. I will be interested to know if you get an answer to your note!

ladiebug

Posted : 1/23/2007 11:19:20 AM

I'm sorry for your loss, I'll pray for you and your family.

When FIL had a heart attack, he instructed MIL & BIL not to tell DH & I,; he claims he didn't want ot worry us that we had enough on our plates. I'll admit I was pleased with BIL when he called and informed us.

Some people feel that they're doing you a favor not to worry you, or cause you grief with such bad news.

ersonally, I want to know.