I don't usually ask... Update - 3 embryos transferred!!

Just got another update.  They had retrieved 12 eggs, 8 of which were viable to be fertilized.  Of the 8 fertilized, 3 were in the 4 to 8 cell stage for transfer back, the rest were only 3 to 4 cells each.  The 3-4 cell eggs that were slower than the 3 transferred, never divided anymore.  :(   So her only hope at this point are the 3 inside her. 

The 5 that did not get transferred would have been cryofrozen if they'd continued to develop, for future attempts if the 3 didn't make it.  Now she has no more future attempts unless she goes through the whole process again.

She is sad and worried.  We are supposed to celebrate her 39th birthday this Friday night (it was Sunday) but there will be some strain I think. 

 That sounds very similar to my daughter's situation...and the baby is due in 3 weeks!  I'm sending positive vibes that it will be the same for your sister!

tashakota

Just got another update.  They had retrieved 12 eggs, 8 of which were viable to be fertilized.  Of the 8 fertilized, 3 were in the 4 to 8 cell stage for transfer back, the rest were only 3 to 4 cells each.  The 3-4 cell eggs that were slower than the 3 transferred, never divided anymore.  :(   So her only hope at this point are the 3 inside her. 

The 5 that did not get transferred would have been cryofrozen if they'd continued to develop, for future attempts if the 3 didn't make it.  Now she has no more future attempts unless she goes through the whole process again.

She is sad and worried.  We are supposed to celebrate her 39th birthday this Friday night (it was Sunday) but there will be some strain I think. 

Sending lots of "grow into a baby little eggs!!" type thoughts.

Anything you could do to treat your sister and help her relax a little?  Especially since its her birthday.  Happy mum, healthy eggs/baby! 

Sending continued good vibes for your sister.  I agree that something fun and/or relaxing would help redirect her mind for a bit and get some positive energy flowing.  Maybe take in a really funny movie, or have a joint pedicure or something like that.  It's so hard to be in a celebration mode when you know there's an undercurrent of anxiety. 

We're having a bbq this Friday (hope it stops raining!!!) with good friends and family at our house for her.  She does have a gift certificate for a massage or pedicure already.  And me and our younger sister hung out with her from noon until 8pm on Tuesday. 

I am just now seeing this but sending baby vibes like crazy now!  I really really hope all works out for the best for her.  It is so frustrating when you are trying to get pregnant and everyone around you keeps popping up pregnant, especially those who aren't even trying.  Hoping for positive test results for her in a few days!

Thank you all for the thoughts and prayers, but it did not work.  She is heartbroken and very sad.  I wish that there was something I could do but there is not.  It seems like everyone around her (and me!) is getting pregnant and I know it must be frustrating for her.

Why is that she and her husband can not have a child, yet so many that should not have children, do?    Thoughts and prayers that she gets through this would be welcome. 

 I am sorry for her, and for you too... This must be hard for you as well in its own way.  That said, CONGRATS for you! 

Do you think she might go down the adoption route?  

Sending lots of healing/comfort vibes in your general directions... 

 Oh dear, I know how heartbroken she must be...no words can make it better, but I will pray that in time she will not be hurting as much as she is now.  Please tell her she is in my prayers.

I'm sorry your sister's dreams weren't realized.   

Chuffy

.. That said, CONGRATS for you! 

I meant that everyone around me was also getting pregnant.  Sorry about that.

Thank you all for your kind words.  She is well loved and I hate to see her so unhappy.  They've been trying since 2000 and this was kind of the last try.  I'm not sure if they'll try IVF again or attempt to adopt or just give up and live their lives.  They are homebodies so I don't see them thinking that now they can travel or do whatever.  I think she will have a really hard time seeing other people's kids for a while. 

I am so very sorry that she has to deal with this sadness, That old lame cliche about there being a reasin doesn't work for me right niw so I for sure would not force it on you all. Please keep the most positive vibe you can find, plant a garden . a silly one form a craft book or some other crafty silly thing that could let you be kids together again.... One of our 5 girls can not have babies and we have always known what an amazing momma she would be ,  then we have daughters who struggle with the entire concept of being parents.  And we are raising thier kids.... Life, the Universe what ever guides your life is crazy that way....

Best of thoughts and prayers that she finds something that will help her hold on to hope for the future.

Bonita of Bwana

 Thanks Bonita, I hope that you guys are doing ok too after all the things lately.

Leslie, I just saw your last update.  I'm so sorry to hear the sad news.  I'm sure all of you are heartbroken, not just her.  We have very good friends who found out they couldn't have children after a few years of trying.  We had a mutual group of friends at the time who were all the same age, all having babies.  They found it so hard to be around all the pregnancies and babies, that they started avoiding social interactions with those friends.  She felt terrible telling me her wish to stay away from them, but I was a safe sounding board since I was also childless.  Like you said, she couldn't understand why a healthy, happy, well-adjusted couple couldn't have kids, but drug-using teens could pop them out every year.  It's crazy.  They started down the adoption road initially, but it didn't feel right.  They eventually widened their circle of friends and activities, and they have a happy, busy life, but I know it's a sadness that stays with them.  I know they would've been super parents.

On the other hand, I had a neighbor who was told as a young woman she couldn't have children.  Lo and behold, at 39, she found herself pregnant, after she and her husband arranged their life around a childless plan (their house had no room for a nursery, no yard, career choices were made, etc.).  It was a complete shock, but she had a healthy boy and he's nearly 4 now.

Since I chose not to have children, I can only try to imagine the sadness one feels in this situation, but having been close to my friend when she faced it, I know what you're feeling as someone who cares about her.