helpppp

thank you very much for all of the information you have given me!!

You said you took the aggressor to a trainer for a month, correct?  You did the right thing to contact a trainer for help but the trainer didn't do the right thing.  Dog to dog aggression needs to be dealt with where it is happening.  The trainer should have told you that it won't help for the trainer to get the dog under control, the trainer needs to observe and help YOU get the dogs under control.  Dogs aren't cars that can be taken to a mechanic, fixed and returned as good as new.:)  I would contact another trainer but would suggest you find one who will work with you at home.  Good luck.

this sounds like a really easy one- just get rid of the toys/bones whenever the two dogs are out together. If one of the dogs is chewing up the house that dog needs to be confined unless being directly supervised. More exercise and more obedience training never hurts.

so last nite was the first nite i tried putting the toys up, and it seemed like she was just bored then, and began to fopllow the pom around and frusterate him, and growl at him like she was trrying to get in front of him all of the time and show him whos boss!! should i maybe keep her on a lead in the house and not allow her free reighn?

This could be total nonsense, but last summer I was at an agility show and a woman walked her flat coated retriever past an ex-pen of other dogs.  One of the dogs in the pen started growling, barking, and lunging at the retriever.  The dog's owner was mortified, she corrected the dog, apologized to the other woman, and said her dog had never acted that way before.  I heard the retriever's owner say "It's OK, we're using to it.  My dog sometimes has seizures and I think other dogs can sense he is not healthy because often he is the victim of unprovoked attack."  I have no idea if there's any weight to that theory, that perhaps other dogs have a keener sense of when another dog has a weakness and they lash out.