Hi everyone! My SO and I got our first dog, a 3 month old Cavapoo named Wuffles after years of 'thinking about it', and we are very excited to bring him home last week. Now.. barely 10 days later we are so very tired and frustrated. Wuffles is my first dog, and my SO's second dog, but he did not train his first. I hope you guys can critique our methods and please take it easy on us, we really are trying!
Wuffles
is only 3 months old, and have not had all his shots nor is he neutered yet. So he cannot go to training classes, the park, or to be socialized.
The Cat
We have a 4 year old cat who has never lived with another animal. Not just any cat, a pretty aggressive and skittish cat. This is why we didn't get a dog for years. We hope that perhaps a small submissive Cavapoo like Wuffles may balance the situation somewhat. For a week, we did not introduce them, they are always in separate rooms. Of course, they smell each other but she did not hiss or anything, just curious and apprehensive. Wuffles is completely oblivious and would just run around loving everything. We rubbed their scents on each other hoping it may help, and gave the cat lots of attention and treats and toys so she doesn't feel ignored. Recently we tried introducing them, me in a slightly closed room with Wuffles and my SO with the cat behind the door, trying to divert her attention with a tin of cat food. She hissed, and we stopped it there. The second time, we put Wuffles in a room and the cat on the other side of the door and let her smell him, but she struck at his paw under the door. That's when we stopped the introductions for now. How do I know when it is appropriate to introduce them again? Will they ever get along?
Wuffle's environment
We live in a house with no yard. Yup, don't ask. So we take him out on a leash. On his first few nights, Wuffles lives in a crate next to his pee pad and a corral is wound tight around these two items. The idea is that Wuffles gets to stay in his crate and have nowhere to go except to go pee on the pad. It works great for a while, he used his pad but then we decided not to use it anymore because it might confuse him. So now he goes outside the house to do his business on the side of the road or the paved cement in front of the garage. I'm not sure if the absence of grass is affecting him?
Oh, Wuffles HATES going outside. I think he was traumatized or something, but every time we go out, he whines and cries and stands between our legs. He hates walkies. We try to walk him after feeding to aid his digestion, but he whines the whole way. The only thing he wants to do is go back home, and boy does he pull on the leash when we're close to the doorstep. Therefore I think he's too afraid to go potty properly. Sure he evacuates.. eventually.. but only a little bit, very hesitantly and nervously. He just wants to go back home, and when he's home, boom! Super happy excited dog again.
The Crate Situation
So, because of the cat, Wuffles is crated inside the closed guest bathroom downstairs. The bathroom door has to be closed in case the cat decides to attack him in his crate, and the crate door is closed in case he decides to get out to pee around his crate. At first, Wuffles loves his crate, he'll take his toys and stash them in it. But as we start closing the doors, he began to whine and cry. Recently, when uncrated, he has developed the habit of taking ALL his toys, even the blankets, out of the crate into the living room. I'm not sure if this is a regular behavior or he really hates his crate and is sending a signal that he wants to have nothing to do with it. It is also quite difficult to get him to go back 'home' whenever we have to leave for work, we have to tempt him with treats in the crate before closing the door. He will whine and scream for about 10 minutes afterwards. I try switching on the radio when ever we're out, and even suggested putting the cat in a room and taking the crate out into the living room (with Wuffles still in it) whenever we can't watch him. My idea is, at least he will see us around him instead of in an empty bathroom. But my SO says this is even more cruel because it would be taunting him with our presence while he is 'locked up'. What do you think?
The Schedule
So.. we both work a lot, but we figured out a schedule which we have kept pretty consistently. In the mornings around 6-7, my SO takes him from his crate, feeds him food and water, takes him out for walkies (if he's up to it) and puts Wuffles back in the crate and goes to work. At 9am, I take Wuffles outside, sometimes he evacuates, sometimes not, and I put him back in the crate. I come home for lunch around 12, immediately after coming home, I take him outside and he usually evacuates then. Then I take him back in and give him water. Usually I make my lunch and let him run around while keeping an eye on him at this point, but recently he has been sneaking off to pee when I'm not looking. Very frustrating! Before leaving at 1pm, I take him out again, then put him back in his crate, close the door, let the cat out and go back to work.
I come home at 5, and immediately take him outside again, then water and food and then outside again. At this point where I'm not sure what to do. I like to let him run around, but he is very sneaky to go pee when I'm not looking. And I usually work at night (making dinner, cleaning, or freelance) so I can't keep my eye on him ALL the time. Should he be crated? Will that be too long? How long is too long to crate a puppy? At 8pm my SO's shift starts and this is his method: he comes home and he takes Wuffles outside, he evacuates, plays with him then feeds him and go (or try to) for a walk. If Wuffles won't poop, crate him for an hour until he does. And only after he poops, will he get to play. If not, back in the crate for another hour. We disagree on this issue.. again, I like Wuffles running around at night, but we both can't watch him and recently he is prone to evacuating indoors. It feels as if it's a catch 22.. if we crate him too much, I'm afraid he may get antisocial or scared, but if we don't crate him, we run the risk of him evacuating outside again. He has been good about going outside when he first got here, but recently he has been having a series of accidents inside.. multiple times a day. It is extremely upsetting and discouraging! Hence all the crating!
I think this is all of it. He is really a happy dog when allowed to run around inside and I love him, but all the business with the crating make me feel terrible. I've been thinking non stop about how to find the balance between all of these situations and still have a comfortable fun home for Wuffles, the cat and us both, but we have no clue how we can do it. I feel like the worst puppy parent ever. Any help is appreciated!