Dog Community

Brownie

Posted : 5/11/2006 7:31:19 PM

Hello my name is Ashley and my moms name is Sandy. I am 17 years old. I have had my dog since I was 2 years old. She is a pure golden retreiver. She was a family dog. When we got ready to leave the house she would go upfront and watch us leave. and if we went outside she would follow us wherever we went. She was very loyal. She started getting really bad about a week ago. May 8, 2006 my mom was washing her and found maggets all over her. and later that night mom said she wouldn't live untill the morning but thankfully she did. And mom was up all night outside with her if she wasn't outside she would bark untill mom got outside. I stayed home from school with her to watch her she had her own little bed outside and her stuffed bunny rabbit with her. well about 9:00 am she got up and started walking around the yard and I was thinking what the heck well then later that day mom called the vet to see if the doc would check her out and if any way to save her. so we took her over there she had her bunny with her. she had to stay in a kenel bc of the maggets and the nurse said that the doc would be there later to check her out and would call us. She thought the maggets would be hot spots. Right before we left mom and I both kissed her and told her we loved her. Later that night about 9:35 pm the phone rang and it was the doc. He said "This Poor Old Girl has so many things wrong with her, Conjestive Heart Failure, Fluid building in her lungs, Inlarged liver, and blood in her stool. He said the best thing was to put her to sleep. He said if it was just artheritus and the maggets he could take care of her". As soon as mom hung up the phone I was shaking so bad and crying I had no idea what to do. I kept telling mom to call them back and say not to put her to sleep. Im so depressed all mom and I do everyday is cry. We miss her so much. I have another dog named Buddy well buddy was always around her. He knew something was wrong with her. well we wouldn't let him outside in the morning the day I stayed home. Finally she was barking then he would bark back at her. So I let him outside and he went and layed with her. now he has been crying he won't go outside hardly anymore. He always looks for her he thinks shes going to come home. We bought this stuffed dog that i was going to put when i buried her but we thought we should give it to buddy so we rubbed it over her before she got burried well when we got home we tried giving it to him but he smelt it and would take it because it wasn't her. The blanket she was laying on the day we took her to the vet was outside and buddy tried pulling on it so he could sleep on it. Then mom washed it and now he won't hardly lay on it.
After we got buddy they stayed in the house over the summer and brownie would crawl up on my bed and when buddy seen she was laying with me he would get up there to and kick me off. Most of the time she would go in moms room and put her chin up on mom untill mom touched her then she layed down beside mom and slept. So now we have another dog to be concerned about his attitude because he knows something is wrong. Because he perks up when mom says brownie and then he doesn't see her. Now we wonder if it was the right thing to put her to sleep. I personally didn't want to but i was being called shelfish. I just wish we could of have went over to see her before he put her to sleep. Now we feel quilty not going over and saying good bye to her. Which we knew we did the first time but it seems like it wasn't good enough. But we did bury her at my grandpas and its a few hundred feet away from the house underneath trees. she loved the shayed. she was all curled up. Her grave is all decorated my aunt got a marker that she is going to engrave on.

todays Date is September 21 2006

Well Hi eveyone this is Sandy sorry that I haven't been on for a few months Im still trying to get used of Browniegirl not being here with me. I has been going on 4 months I still by our other dog Buddy I just wish he would come up to me like Brownie did and put her head on my lap. I thought over time I could get over it but something came over me last night , I guess becasue I was watching T.V. it was Grey's Anatomy Where Mc Dreamy had to put his dog to sleep that is when it hit me all over again. I thought I just better get back in here and say hi to evey one that has wrote to me and Ashley and buddy our dear Browniegirl. we still miss you Brownie you are still in our hearts and we still think of you all the time. love you Brownei girl.......

glenmar

Posted : 5/11/2006 7:54:18 PM

I'm very sorry for your loss.

Sometimes the most loving gift we can give to our dogs is the gift of a painless release to the Rainbow Bridge. Know that you'll meet again and that she is happy, healthy and whole again.

marlania

Posted : 5/11/2006 8:07:43 PM

So sorry for your loss.

Diann Cooke

Posted : 5/11/2006 11:37:47 PM

Hi Ashley

I have just read your post and I really feel for you at this time.Your dog knew how much you loved her and think of putting her to sleep as a gift to her.It was a very brave act of kindness.She was so ill.
My Shedra left us 3 months ago, I had her for 18 years,she was also very ill at the end.
Just let the tears flow.
Take care.Thinking of you.

Sandy Danold

Posted : 5/12/2006 12:04:18 AM

[

] thank you very much writting to me and my mom ,but alot of times she didn't seem like she was in any pain just the 2 last days I just wonder if the vet really checked her out and I wonder how bad it was my mom keeps looking on the websites to look things up that was wrong with her,and she seen that some dogs does make it by eating different dogfoods but who knows right ? only the vet my mom wanted to aske the vet somethings but he wasnt there. But its done and over with but we are hurtting so much it seems like she should still be here with us.

Sandy Danold

Posted : 5/12/2006 12:05:02 AM

Thank you

Sandy Danold

Posted : 5/12/2006 12:11:48 AM

Well we hope we did the right thing but you know how it feels when you think you did the right thing and the next you don'?. well thats how we feel like we would of done any thing to have here still with us and we are sorry to hear about your pet did you take it hard also and do you still cry over her and think about her all the time? there isn't one min. that we dont think of her we can just see Browniegirl all the time and it don't seem right we think she should meet us at the front of the house with her ears up like ohboy you are home at last. we did take some pictures of her grave but didnt know if we should have post them on here. well thank for writting to us.

glenmar

Posted : 5/12/2006 5:51:25 AM

We always wonder. My last cocker was full of cancer, and at her age we opted not to treat. I've done the whole amputation/chemo route and it was HARD on the boy we treated and it didn't extend his life. So with Misty, we wanted to give her the BEST time she had left. Still when it came time for the vet to come out and put her down, I was torn. The poor girl went down hard and fast (in a matter of a few days) which isn't uncommon with cancer. But she was in such bad shape, her BP so low that it took a LOT of meds for her to go to the Bridge...her little heart wasn't pumping hard enough to spread the drug through her system.

In December we lost a 5 month old gsd. And of course, I agonized that I should have rushed him to the vet.....but, my vet told me that it wouldn't have helped. I knew, from looking in his eyes that he was leaving us and that he was at peace with it. He left us snuggled up in his crate with his head resting on my hand. He'd been HEALTHY and it was a shock, but sometimes extreme medical intervention isn't the best thing to do. There was a REASON this little guy left so young and a reason that we fell so in love with him. He lived only 5 months but had more love in those 5 months than many dogs have in a lifetime. And I'll go further here....based on how my other dogs react to one of the pack who isn't feeling well, our Sweet Mr Ears was absolutely healthy until the last few hours of his life. It was his time. It broke my heart and still makes me tear about to think of it, but, it was his time.

Dogs don't show pain. They are very stoic. When they actually SHOW that they are hurting, they are REALLY in pain. So that you didn't SEE that she was in pain except the last couple days, well, that doesn't mean anything. She would have hidden her pain from you.

Your Brownie had a good life. She knew love. And now she's at the Bridge waiting for the day that she'll cross it with you. But, while she waits (which won't feel like any time at all at the Bridge) she's running, young and healthy, and playing with all her new friends. I'm guessing your mom is online looking for answers because she's doing what we all do.....second guessing herself and trying to figure out WHY. That's what SHE needs to do. But, the why is simply that it was Brownies time to go to the Bridge and be rewarded for her life of loyalty. Death is a gift to those who die.....with all the wonderful things that await us, human or canine. It only hurts those of us who are left behind.

Sending prayers for peace and acceptance for you and your Mom.

Run free Brownie.

ron2

Posted : 5/12/2006 6:19:53 AM

Dogs not showing pain is a holdover from their wolf-like ancestry. Ailing dogs would be cast out, killed or left to die on their own. So, yes, by the time you know your dog is in pain, it is excruciating. You did the right thing.

My cat was almost 17 when I had to have her put to sleep because of drastic kidney failure. I was fortunate to be there with her and she went to her final sleep in my arms. It hurt like you know what and still does.

The pain is another battle scar to add to my collection but the pain of loss is the price of the love we give to and receive from our pets. Your dog is at peace and you have done the right thing.

A big hug and doggy slobbers.

forpaws

Posted : 5/12/2006 7:30:05 AM

I'm sorry for your loss also. One is really never ever ready to let go and sometimes it is one of the hardest things to do is to let go.

Glenda, Ron, myself and many of us on this forum have experienced exactly the same pain you and your mom are going through. Please know that your beloved Brownie is now not in pain and is whole again.
Consentrate on Buddy who needs you right now also. He too has suffered a loss of a bonded friend and is mourning her too.

Sending the two, three of you comforting thoughts and understanding of your loss.

As Ron puts it,
Hugs and doggy slobbers.

Diann Cooke

Posted : 5/12/2006 7:30:17 AM

Hi Ashley

Hold in there.You are hurting because you loved Brownie so much and you dont know life without her.All the things you are feeling are normal.It is all part of grieving.I am thinking of you so much.I have a daughter of 17 and she loves dogs too.I have told her all about you and what you are going through.Take Care.

Diann

sharismom

Posted : 5/12/2006 8:43:40 AM

I am sorry for your loss. Run free Brownie[sm=angel.gif]

rredbird

Posted : 5/12/2006 9:09:51 AM

I am so sorry for your loss of Brownie. She sounded like a special girl and I know she knew you loved her and still do. She will be at the Bridge waiting for you and Buddy and mom.

These websites may help, they helped me when I lost my Lani girl.

[linkhttp://petloss.com/poems/maingrp/rainbowb.htm]http://petloss.com/poems/maingrp/rainbowb.htm[/link]

[linkguilt.html[/link]>http://www.angelbluemist.com/frames/guilt.html]http://www.angelbluemist.com/frames/guilt.html[/link][/size]

[linkhttp://www.petloss.com/dealing.htm]http://www.petloss.com/dealing.htm[/link]

Run free and have fun at the Bridge Brownie [sm=angel.gif]

Sandy Danold

Posted : 5/12/2006 2:37:21 PM

This is Ashleys mom and yes I am trying to find out answers that maybe I could of done something different with Brownie. I know I loved her more then any thing and it just kills me to think about her I see her face all the time and wondering how she is doing and if she is thinking of me and wondering if she is also mad at me for doing what I didnt want to do at the time.
I hope she is alot better off I know she is but it just hurts all the time I just want to see her waiting for me when I get off of work but she isnt there. She was my best friend when I would sit out side she would sit right next to me I feel bad since we didnt go back to the vets that night when he called us we should of been there for her but we did say our good byes a few hours before that. I just needed more time with my Browniegirl SHE WAS MY LIFE. thanks for writting to us it helps knowing there is someone out there that cares.

Sandy Danold

Posted : 5/12/2006 2:40:33 PM

thank you for your kind words , and yes she was so special to me and my daugher. we will always love her .and dream about her all the time.