I hope that I will find the right words one day to honor Keela like she deserves. She is a special girl that taught me so much, gave me so much...and has left a huge hole in my life and heart. She was my first show dog - a trial to see if I would like it. She was a wonderful, loving pet and show dog - a challenge and a joy. A joy is what I want to remember, all the laughs, her beautiful beautiful head, the sillies, the food begging, the leg lifted for chest scritches pleas, the kisses, the back talking foot scratching spitfire pest. 
In other words - a true Miniature Pinscher.
I let her go Wednesday morning after an exploratory liver surgery/biopsy showed liver cancer. I am still reeling from the quickness of it, the finality of it all. It was only a week before on a Tuesday night that I noticed her little tummy swollen. We couldn't get in till Thursday at the vet, but my vet had left plans for us. Blood work and an x-ray, followed by an ultrasound Friday morning. I must say, my vet was awesome. They called her on Thursday, which is her spay/neuter day at the animal shelter, to set up the US on Friday, her day off. We thought, going into the weekend, that we were dealing with gallstones. By Monday, her breathing was troubled, her little tummy so huge. An emergency vet visit resulted in 150cc fluid pulled from her stomach. By now, the blood work was back and things were beginning to be troubling: high liver values, low protein/albumin. Dr. B said we could be dealing with PLE or PLN or a food intolerance or a liver tumor. She was definitely tender in the gallbladder, liver area. So, Tuesday would be more blood work, fasting this time, and x-ray's for a liver biopsy surgery on Wednesday.
I had noticed little things, disconnected things, late January and into February that had me at the vet Feb. 20th - but nothing was found. I regret not doing blood work then, but the outcome would have been no different I know. Keela lived for food, and when she didn't want food, you knew something was wrong. She was in a lot of pain from that Thursday/Friday into the weekend even with pain meds. Monday I could tell she was beyond miserable. Food wouldn't stay down. Just within 5 days, the white spot on her liver had spread to multiple places, and her liver was significantly larger. I was in the surgery room with her, and her liver was enlarged, firm, and just looked wrong - and the biopsy proved cancer. I knew the possibility of what we faced, so I made the decision going in, if it was liver cancer, I wouldn't make her suffer, I would let her go without coming back to pain...
I saw your condolences on the daily chat, and I thank you for them. It has been difficult, this post. Keela had just turned 6, was healthy, so this was beyond a shock that I lost her like I did. Life is full of shock or surprises - whichever you like. Don't regret not hugging/kissing your loved ones more. Do it. Cherish them. Tell them. Hold them like you'll never let them go. I know I wish I had never let my girl go, but I know she isn't hurting anymore.
Keela baby, I love you and miss you so very much...................
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