calliecritturs
Posted : 5/5/2008 7:37:24 PM
Absolutely -- I've been there way too many times myself!!!
Has he thot about temping at all? Pretty much each different type of job has some kind of temp agency. And even if it's not something you'd want to do ALL the time, even manual labor (not daily labor but assembly work, security guard work etc.) can be a lift if it helps some money come in and helps him walk away feeling just a LITTLE bit more productive.
When David and I first got married, he had been an upper level executive in the UK. Let's just say he made literally almost 20 times what I did. *sigh* That company was 'sold' and he was the one who stayed all the way to the bitter end until the doors were locked. THEN he came here.
He had played with the idea of an internet company but it just wasn't a good enough money-spinner to work. But unfortunately when he got HERE it was horrible for him. The US is **SO** degree-bound. If you don't have a college degree you can hang it up. And ALL of David's background was experiential -- he had some university, but he'd never had to finish a degree and had been working in fraud and accounting management for YEARS.
He came here? Shoot -- he temped for THREE YEARS here with Account Temps and other agencies -- essentially he was a glorified copy clerk ... and sometimes not even a 'glorified' one. But he brought in money. It is easier to GET a job when you have one -- even if it's not one you like. People respect your time more if you are working.
Ultimately David wound up placed in a job where he moved laterally and wound up with a virual career-change. It wasn't so much of a change -- just a different field (not even a field they HAVE in the UK). But it was a place that enabled him to get over the hurdle of being a white non-American with a "funny accent" (and that was a HUGE big nasty problem at first -- I had no clue there was so much discrimination out there and this was all prior to 9/11 for crying out loud).
But eventually it fell into place, he got a GOOD job and was able to prove himself. But we had some sparse times back then -- and every little bit he could bring in helped even if it was just copy work. We only had one car (in a city the size of Orlando that was*tough*) -- so often we'd have to leave the house at 6 a.m. so he could take me to work and drop me off so HE could go wherever he had to work for the day ... so usually it was 6-7 or better before we got home at night. LONG days ... long days for the dogs. But we did it and managed.
Take heart -- these are times when everbuddy has to haul in and squeeze -- and the difficult thing is many of you have never known that before. The last 20-30 years have been pretty good ones here in the States so a lot of you are limited to "When I was a kid I had to walk 17 miles in the SNOW to school" stories from relatives.
But it's times like this when you learn to pull together that will either make a marriage/relationship work ... or tear it apart. But the making it work part is the best part, honestly.
Good luck ... wish I could do more!
So stuff like being a security guard at night can leave him open to still interview days. A lot of places like hiring people "for the summer" ... or "part time" -- and it can be good for the ego if nothing more. It's better than sitting around hating yourself. (and that does happen after a while)
But ... in doing temp work, it enables you to have another set of eyes looking at your resume.
I'm not trying to be a buttinsky -- but man, all the times *I* have been unemployed and had to start over in my life ... I tell ya -- all I'ved learned better count for something with sumbuddy!! LOL